Platonic is a Funny Word
by mind-the-apostrophe
Summary: Patrick Woodhouse is a charismatic college student who has the inexplicable urge to butt in to other people's lives. He also has a best friend, Zoe Knightley, who restrains him as best she can. - Modern Emma with a gender twist
1. Chapter 1 : Meet Patrick Woodhouse

This is a modern version of Emma with an obvious gender reversal. Enjoy! Please review! Story is being completed and all chapters will be posted by end of July.

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**Chapter 1: Meet Patrick Woodhouse**

There was something about Patrick Woodhouse that made you both love and hate him. He had the annoying habit of making everything in life seem easy. Not many people – especially women - were immune to his smile, swagger, and short blonde curls. It was hard to articulate the source of Patrick's charm. It might have been his confidence, ease, or his ability to command a room. Whatever it was, it was clear that the world was his to conquer. At one point in our lives we've all met Patrick Woodhouse. At one point in our lives most of us have either cursed or fallen in love with a Patrick Woodhouse. He was _that_ guy: t_he guy_ guys wanted to have a beer with and _the guy_ girls wanted to snatch up.

"Just pick one already!" his friend Taylor urged at the bar one night. "Seriously, Pat. There are about five girls staring at you right now from what I can see. Put them out of their misery and just talk to one, will you?"

Patrick smirked. "It's just too easy. Now where's the fun in that?"

"Ok..." Taylor was trying to understand his friend's twisted logic. "So you want a girl who doesn't want you...?"

"Oh no, I want her to want me." Patrick said. "I just don't want to her to be so eager. That's a bad sign."

"Yeah that makes absolutely no sense whatsoever." Taylor said.

"Yup." admitted Patrick. "But then it wouldn't be me, would it?"

"You're insane, but at least you're interesting. I'll give you that."

Taylor and Patrick had been friends since high school, witnessing both the best and worst of each other with endurance. After eight years of school, women, and the in-betweens they'd become more like brothers. Now in their fourth and final year in college, the pair was opening up their special club to one more person – a much needed third roommate for their apartment. They had spent all summer searching without success and with school almost upon them, they were running out of time to secure one. Out of sheer desperation, Taylor agreed to give the spot to a transfer student that had contacted him online.

"I hope this guy is normal." Patrick said. "The last guy we met with was a mouth breather who collected action figures." He cringed, recalling the awkward memory. "So what's this guy's name again?"

"Harry." Taylor answered.

Patrick raised his eyebrow. "What kind of name is Harry? Is this kid a wizard or something?"

"Physics major, actually." Taylor answered.

_So basically the same thing_, Patrick thought. "When is he meeting us?" he asked Taylor.

"About ten minutes ago." he said, looking at his watch.

"Cool." Patrick said. "So, while we wait, tell me how things are going with you and Maggie."

Taylor laughed. "Why are you always so interested? You're like a chick!"

"Hey! Take that back." Patrick defended himself. "I just like to revel in my victory. If that's not manly, I don't know what is. After all, I was the one to introduce you two freshman year."

"Yeah, and you won't let me forget it." Taylor commented.

"You two are cute. Remember to name your first born after me." Patrick joked.

Taylor's ears turned ever-so-slightly red at his friend's words. "Hey, that sounds better than becoming an eternal bachelor like you."

"You say 'bachelor' like it's a bad thing!" cried a surprised Patrick over the noise.

"Excuse me? Are you two Patrick and Taylor?"

The two friends whipped around and came face to face with their new roommate, Harry. If Patrick Woodhouse was _that guy_, Harry Smith definitely wasn't. Standing in the crowded, loud bar, he looked pretty insecure and small, which was an accomplishment considering he was so tall. He had a thin frame without much muscle and, on a Friday night, made the bold and unsuccessful choice of wearing a plaid button down shirt to a college bar.

The boys greeted him with enthusiasm. It didn't take more than five minutes to discover that Harry was a genuinely nice person. That alone set him apart from the rest of their poor roommate prospects. Patrick and Taylor's anxiety about living with a stranger started to dissolve.

"So Harry, when are you moving in?" Taylor asked

"Well, Friday I guess. If that's ok with you, that is..." he answered.

"Sure thing!" Patrick said, handing him another drink. "I'm not doing anything, so I'll help you."

"Wow, that would be really great!" Poor Harry seemed astonished that anyone would be so ready and willing to help him.

"Don't mention it. What are roommates for?" Patrick asked. His pocket started vibrating. The screen of his phone flashed **ZOE KNIGHTLEY**. He smiled "Excuse me guys, but I have to take this."

Patrick stepped outside the bar for a second and flipped open his phone. "What's up, Knightley?"

"I have a flat tire and I'm pretty sure my little sister used my spare to make a swing in our back yard." the familiar voice said quickly on the other end.

"What do you want me to do about it?"

"Patrick!"

"I'm kidding, I'm kidding!" he assured her. "Where are you? I'll come pick you up."

"I'm at the sketchy gas station on the corner of 5th and Madison." Zoe said.

Patrick winced. "Ok then, I'll make sure to hurry."

"What's all that noise in the background?" she asked.

"Oh...that. I'm outside of O'Grady's right now." he explained.

"Wait! Patrick, you haven't been drinking have you?"

"I've had one beer. I'm fine to drive. I promise." he said. One could always count on Zoe to be cautious and over protective.

He heard her sigh with relief. "Ok, good. See you soon."

"On my way." he hung up the phone and went back inside to his roommates.

"Hey guys, I have to split. Zoe has a flat tire. Can you two get home ok?" he asked.

"Sure." Taylor said.

"Who's Zoe?" Harry asked curiously.

"Oh. She's just my brother's fiancé's sister." Patrick explained with a nonchalant smirk.

Taylor laughed at Harry's confused expression. "Do you really have to explain it that way every time? After all, you and Zoe knew each other before your siblings started dating. Would it kill you to just say 'friends'?"

"No," Patrick smiled mischievously, tossing his keys in the air and catching them. "but my way is more fun."


	2. Chapter 2 : Why are we Friends?

**Chapter 2: Why are we friends again?**

"Get out of bed, Patrick!"

"No!"

"I brought you coffee."

"I don't care! Let me sleep."

Suddenly the covers were thrown off of his body and a cold blast hit him. He saw a familiar red head hovering above him with her hands on her hips.

"Jesus, Zoe! What if I'd been naked?" Patrick asked his friend, finally sitting up in his bed.

"Oh please, that's not your style." she said casually, opening his blinds. Patrick winced at the sudden outpouring of light into his messy room. She smirked. "Nice boxers by the way. The pink cupcake print is very flattering."

Patrick got up and reached for his jeans and started to put them on. "Are you insulting my mother's taste, Knightley? She bought these for me last year."

Zoe did her best to hide her amusement. "No, no. I'm complimenting them. Speaking of your mother, remind me to ask for a babysitting wage next time I see her. I'm tired of looking after you for charity. I should at least get some community service hours or something."

"Hey, what are friends for?" Patrick said, slipping on the blue polo shirt Zoe handed him.

"Speaking of that, why are we friends again?" Zoe asked.

"Well, I change your flat tires and you bring me coffee..."

"...and wake you up for important appointments." she finished for him.

"What important appointment?" Patrick asked.

Zoe sighed in frustration. "A certain couple we know is getting married soon, Pat. Your brother...my sister. We have a fitting today, remember?"

"But that's at 2pm, isn't it? Why'd you wake me up so early?" he asked

Zoe rolled her eyes and held up her left wrist. Patrick grabbed her watch hand and looked at the time. He raised his eyebrows.

"Wow." he said, slightly embarrassed. "It's 1:30..."

"You're welcome." Zoe said smugly, handing him a cup of coffee.

"Who even let you in to the apartment? Did Taylor or Harry let you in?" Patrick asked.

She shook her head. "Used my key." she replied nonchalantly.

"Key?! When did you get a key?"

"The time you gave me one..."

"Oh, right."

"Ok, let's hurry." Zoe urged. "We have twenty-seven minutes to travel to a shop thirty minutes away. Now's not the time to pamper!"

After dragging a still groggy Patrick out the door and into her car, Zoe sped off to their fitting. Patrick had been dreading this all week. The last way he wanted to spend his Saturday afternoon was dressing up like a penguin for his brother. The only thing that comforted him was that there was a good chance Zoe's sister would force her into a comical bridesmaid's dress. That was sure to cheer him up. Still, he'd rather be sleeping or in the library pretending to study.

"How long will this take?" he asked.

"An hour or two, maybe." replied Zoe.

He moaned. "Seriously?"

She rolled her eyes. "Oh come on, Patrick. What would you be doing otherwise? Pretending to study? Sleeping all afternoon?"

_Wow, she was good._

"Yeah, yeah." he mumbled.

When they got to the boutique, Zoe's sister, Sarah was waiting impatiently for them. She practically pushed them both into dressing rooms the minute of their arrival.

"Sarah?" Zoe asked from behind her door thirty minutes later. "Is all of this tulle really necessary?"

"Just come on out, sweetie!" her sister called. "We're all waiting to see you."

Patrick and his brother had their tuxes fitted without any problems. Now all that was left was to see the maid of honor's gown which Sarah had picked for her little sister.

When Zoe stepped slowly out of her cave, Patrick snorted with laughter. His brother Kyle, the supportive groom, hit him in the back of the head. It didn't matter. Patrick was storing this image of Zoe in his head for safe-keeping. It was too good to be true.

Her skirt was so large and pink, Patrick had to practically bite his hand to refrain from making Glenda the Good Witch jokes. There was so much tulle in the dress that it made noise with each movement. By the look on Zoe's face, Patrick could tell she was experiencing a mixture of embarrassment and shock.

"Aw, Honey!" Sarah gushed. "You look so adorable-"

"Are you blind?" Zoe interrupted. "I look like one of the cupcakes on Patrick's boxers."

"Wait, what- " Kyle started.

"Too complicated to explain." she said desperately. "Sarah, you can't be serious! Are you really going to make a girl with flaming red hair wear the pinkest dress in history? Don't I have some pull as maid of honor?"

"Oh, sorry, Zoe." Patrick said. "We can't hear you. Your dress is too loud."

She shot him a death stare. "It's so unfair that all men look good in tuxes." she mumbled, retreating back into the dressing room.

"Well," Patrick said happily as Zoe drove them back to campus. "I think that went smashingly, don't you? I'm so glad you woke me up for this."

"Do you ever get tired of torturing me?" she asked.

"Do you never get tired of telling me what to do?" he countered.

"No."

"Same." Patrick smiled and sat back. All in all, it had been a fairly productive Saturday.


	3. Chapter 3 : Manly Bonding

**Chapter 3: Manly Bonding**

"You O.K. there, Harry?"

Patrick only heard huffing and puffing in response to his question.

"Just another quarter mile or so. You're doing great, man! Keep it up."

Earlier that day Taylor had convinced Patrick to take Harry out for a nice run – "manly bonding," if you will. This seemed like a brilliant idea and Patrick was glad to spend some quality time with his friend, but after watching his new roommate try and keep up with his confident stride, he started to regret the decision. After a few more minutes, they finished hard and stopped to stretch near the edges of the campus practice fields.

"Whose idea was this again?" Harry asked between breaths, hands on his knees.

"Put your arms over your head to open up your lungs." Patrick said, demonstrating. "And it was Taylor's idea, by the way."

"Remind me to kill Taylor." Harry said, copying Patrick's stance. "Wow, this actually feels better. Did you used to run?"

"Yeah, in high school," he answered. "but I gave it up in college."

"Could've had me fooled." Harry laughed.

"So how have your first few weeks of school been?"

Harry shrugged. "Classes have been great, I guess. I haven't really met anyone except for you, Zoe and Taylor though."

Patrick sighed. He'd been afraid of this. Contrary to popular believe, guys like Patrick weren't completely insensitive to the plights of the socially underprivileged. In fact, for some inexplicable reason, Patrick found himself more and more eager to help his new friend adjust to life at the university. Harry was a nice guy – a good old fashioned, innocent, underrated nice guy – and he deserved a good things.

"Well, Harry" Patrick started, holding himself up proudly. "I can help you with that. Stick with me, and you'll go places."

"Ball! Ball!"

A female voice caught their attention just before a small lacrosse ball catapulted in the direction of Harry's head. He jumped in surprise while Patrick caught it with his left hand.

"Here you go," he said, tossing it back into the girl's stick.

"Thanks." she smiled sweetly at them. Her long blonde hair was swept up into a messy bun atop her head. She had a tall, slim figure and a perfectly white smile. As she ran back to her game, Patrick noticed that she not-so-subtly glanced back at them for a second look. He thought he heard Harry gulp.

"I definitely haven't met girls like her." he confessed, staring back at her as she ran away.

Patrick chuckled. "Harry, you could have someone like her easily."

Harry looked skeptical. "Patrick, I know you just met me and all, but I thought that by now you would've realized that I'm pretty geeky."

"You're smart! So what? Girls love that!" Patrick said. "Plus, it's all about the way you present yourself. You have to believe to can score a girl like that before you actually can."

"Well, she's gone now, so I guess that was the shortest relationship in history." Harry said.

"You're forgetting something, grasshopper." Patrick said, helping him off the ground. "We are close friends with the captain of the lacrosse team. If we want to know that girl's name and number, that information is just a holler away."

"We do?" Harry started, confused. "Who do we know that's - ?"

"KNIGHTELY!" Patrick practically screamed across the field. "ZOE KNIGHTEY!"

From a distance, Harry squinted and could barely make out a red head emerge from the huddle of girls and start jogging over to them. He hadn't known Zoe had been playing over there, let alone that she was their captain.

"Geeze Woodhouse. Embarrass me, why don't you?" she said when she got there. She leaned on her stick casually as she spoke to them. "Hi Harry," she said with a pleasanter air. "It's good to see you out and about."

"Thanks." he said self consciously. "We're not keeping you from practice are we?" he asked.

"Oh no!" she assured him. "Our scrimmage just ended, so I'm free."

"I can tell." Patrick piped in. "You're just a tad sweaty there, Knightley." he teased.

She rolled her eyes. "Yes, Patrick. Girls do sweat. That sometimes happens. Now, did you need me for something or did you have the sudden desire to belt out my name to the entire campus?"

"Who's that girl over there?" Patrick asked, pointing. "The one with the long blonde hair wearing the blue shorts."

"Jenna?" Zoe asked. "What about her?"

"Could you bring her over here please?"

"Why?" she asked, looking suspicious.

"Because you love me."

"Try again, Patrick."

"Because Harry wants to ask her something." he offered lamely.

"O.K..." she said. "I'll be right back."

As she jogged back to the herd of females on the other side of the field, Harry grabbed his friend's arm in panic.

"What do you mean I 'want to ask her something'?!" his voice cracked. "I don't want to ask her anything! I don't want to talk to her!"

"Why not?"

"Because the longer I don't talk to her, the longer she doesn't see me completely freak out!"

"Hold on there, buddy." Patrick said, patting him on the back. Patrick had never witnessed the symptoms for a panic attack first hand, but he was guessing they were similar, if not identical to Harry's actions at that moment. "Just breathe, ok? Breeeeaathe."

Harry inhaled deeply and seemed to calm, but he looked up again and saw Zoe running back over with Jenna.

"Holy shit! What do I say?" he asked desperately.

Let me do that talking, ok?" Patrick said. "Just stand there and try to look pretty. Can you do that?"

"No!" he cried.

_Too late._

"Hey guys, this is Jenna Elton." Zoe said as they stopped in front of the boys once more.

"Harry, did you have something to say?" she asked him.

While Harry fought the urge to scamper like Bambi, Patrick stepped in.

"Harry here just wanted to invite you ladies out with us later tonight. If you're free that is." he said to Jenna.

She beamed. "Oh yeah. I'd love to go out with y'all." her southern twang coated her words like molasses. "That's so nice of you to invite me, Harry and..."

"Oh, that's my friend Patrick." Zoe offered.

"Patrick." Jenna repeated, smiling at him.

"Great!" he cried. He heard a sigh of relief come out of Harry next to him.

"Ok," Jenna said. "Well, I'm gonna drive home now. It was really nice meeting both of you."

"You're driving?" Patrick asked before she could escape.

"Yeah." she said, flipping her long blonde mane over her shoulder.

"Well," Patrick said as the wheels in his mind turned. "We ran all the way over here and Harry's shin splits came back. I mean, he beat me here by a long shot. I had to sprint to keep up with the guy, but I guess his speed has taken its toll. Do you think he could catch a ride with you?"

Patrick saw Zoe narrow her eyes at him. No doubt she'd picked up on his ulterior motives.

"Sure!" Jenna said. "I've had shin splints before, so I know what you're going through." she said to Harry.

"Uh...thanks?" Harry said awkwardly.

"Do you want a ride too, Patrick?" Jenna asked hopefully.

She shook his head. "I'm good. Actually Zoe promised me she'd run home with me."

"Funny, because I don't remember saying that." Zoe chimed in.

Patrick laughed and gritted his teeth. "Good thing I remembered for you!"

"OK, well you kids have fun." Jenna said. "Come on, Harry."

The couple walked away to Jenna's car. When they were a safe distance away, Zoe turned to Patrick. With her arms folded and mouth somber, he could tell she meant business.

"What?" he asked defensively. "Can't a guy help his buddy out every now and then? Since when has generosity been considered a sin?

"Since now!" Zoe cried. "Pat, you chose Jenna Elton for a guy like Harry? Really?"

"Hey!" he said. "Harry's amazing. You don't think he can charm Jenna?"

Zoe sighed. "That's not what I'm saying...it's just. She's not..."

"She seemed sweet." he offered.

"Let's just say that not everything that's sweet is...good for you."

"Meaning...?"

"I guess we'll all find out, won't we?" she asked.

Patrick smiled. "I'm totally calling your bluff, Knightley and I'm going to enjoy it when I'm right and you're wrong!"

She raised her eyebrow. "Pat, when does that ever happen?"

"Hey! There's a first time for everything!"

"You know what the worst part of this whole thing is?" Zoe asked.

"What?"

"Because of your stupid story I lost my ride and now I have to run home with you after practice. You suck." she said, folding her arms again in a huff.

"Well..." Patrick said, casually walking behind her. "Maybe I'll just have to carry your ailing body home..."

"What? You wouldn't even- AHHH!" Zoe yelped as her friend swung her over his shoulder.

"I caught one! I caught one!" he cried triumphantly, bouncing up and down.

"Put me down!" Zoe yelled, half laughing. He placed her down carefully and she recovered from her temporary escape from gravity.

"Why don't we just race home like civilized human beings?" she asked slyly, bending over in the runner's position.

"I'm game." Patrick said. "You know me, I'm always game.

"Ready, set...go!"


	4. Chapter 4 : I Told You So!

**Chapter 4 : I Told You So! **

"I still don't understand why I have to be here..." Zoe whispered through a fake smile at dinner.

"Because," Patrick answered quietly. "I can't get those two together when we have an odd number."

"Patrick, I can't tell you how flattered I am to be your fake date."

"I know it's been a dream of yours since you met me, darling." he joked back.

"So, Patrick." Jenna said, capturing his attention from his conversation with Zoe. "Harry just told me you ran track in high school. I think that's fantastic."

"Thanks." he said. "I guess..."

Confusion was starting to fall over the usually collected Patrick Woodhouse. This girl he'd hand picked out for his friend certainly looked the part. Saying she was gorgeous was an understatement. Still, he noticed that for most of the meal she'd tried to talk to him and not Harry.

The waiter brought them all refills on their drinks a few minutes later. Jenna took a sip of hers, and called the waiter back with a snap of her fingers. Zoe raised her eyebrows at her fake date.

"Excuse me," Jenna said. "but this isn't diet."

"It's not going to kill you, Jenna." Zoe said.

Jenna chose to ignore that statement. "Just being a diet out...oh and a slice of lime would be great."

Patrick knew Zoe well enough to read her body language. When he looked over and saw she had her jaw clenched and she was twisting her cloth napkin in her lap, it meant 't_his girl is driving me nut_s.'

"I'm going to go to the little girls' room." Jenna said, getting up from her chair. Harry got up awkwardly too, probably wondering if he needed to formally stand when a lady left the table. Luckily, he managed to pretend like he was adjusting his chair.

Patrick caught Zoe's gaze and he widened his eyes. He needed a moment alone with Harry. Apparently, she could read his looks as well as he could read her body language, because a second later she said, "Why don't I come with you, Jenna?"

And with that, the two females exited gracefully from the table, leaving the two gentlemen to have a sophisticated, serious conversation.

"Jesus Christ! What am I doing?" Harry burst out.

"You're doing perfectly, Harry. I have to admit, there's something a little off with her." he confessed.

"Is it something I did?" Harry asked. "Should I have pushed in her chair for her? Should I have taken her coat? I knew it!"

"Don't worry so much." Patrick said. "Be cool and everything will fall into place."

Harry nodded.

"So, are you having fun?" Patrick asked hopefully.

Harry's facial expression looked doubtful. Patrick sighed. Honestly, he didn't blame the kid much. He looked positively sick. Actually...he looked genuinely sick.

"Hey Harry, are you felling alright, buddy?" Patrick asked.

"I – I don't know." Harry said, his face turning slightly green. "I feel kind of... sort of..."

Suddenly, he pushed out his chair and sprinted to the restroom. Patrick could only guess what he was going.

Ten minutes later, the girls were still in the bathroom and Harry had already left for home. Patrick felt like a failure for the most part. He was at least comforted that women took so long in the bathroom and as a result his friend avoided an embarrassing scene.

"Where's Harry?" Jenna asked when they came back out.

"Emergency...tutoring session." Patrick lied horribly. "Someone really needed help with their physics homework so good ole Harry sprung into action. He's a good friend like that."

Zoe rolled her eyes.

The three sat there in awkward silence for a long time until Zoe's phone beeped.

"Ah geeze." she said, looking concerned.

"What is it?" Patrick asked.

"A text from one of my teammates." she said. "It just says '**911 teammate injured**'."

"You should go! It sounds urgent." Jenna said looking overly concerned.

"Do you want to come too?" Zoe asked her.

"No!" she said a little too quickly. "I'll stay here and keep Patrick company. It's the polite thing to do."

"Ok..." Zoe said.

"Here! You can borrow my car." Jenna threw Zoe her keys and she caught them mid-air. Turning to Patrick she said sweetly, "You don't mind taking me home tonight, do you Patrick?"

"Uh..." he started. "I guess not."

"Alright, well I better go now." Zoe rushed outside into the rain.

About five seconds after her departure, Patrick noticed Jenna switched seats. Now she was sitting next to him. In fact, she seemed to be inching her seat closer to him...too close.

"Thank God they're gone." she whispered to him, touching his arm.

_What?_

"I thought they'd never leave us alone..."

"You mean...our dates?" Patrick asked.

She nodded. "I had to get one of my girlfriends to text Zoe to get her out of here."

"Excuse me?" Patrick asked, his eyes practically popping out of their sockets.

Jenna giggled. "Patrick, I've figured you out. You don't have to pretend anymore!"

"Oh really?" he asked. "And what's that exactly?"

"Oh Patrick...Patrick, Patrick, Patrick." she reached up and twirled one of his curls with her finger. "I know you set this whole thing up as a cover, but you know, you could've just asked me out."

_What?_

"Uh..." Patrick moved his chair over a bit, trying to put some distance between them. "No, I really just wanted you to go out with my friend. You know, Harry? Remember him?" She only laughed at that. Patrick was trying to decide whether, at that particular moment, he was more disturbed or offended. "And remember, I came with another girl." he pointed out.

"Oh come on!" Jenna cried. "Everyone knows that you and Zoe are totally platonic. You can't fool me, Patrick Woodhouse. Nice try."

And with that, she grabbed his face and smashed it against her own. This was Patrick's most uncomfortable kiss for a number of reasons. Firstly, the corner of the table was pushed up against his rib cage. Secondly, it was with his friend's date. Thirdly, it was with her. He resisted the impolite urge to wipe his mouth when he pulled back.

"Uh..." was the only thing coming out of his mouth.

"I think that said it all, didn't it?" she asked, winking at him.

"Jenna, how do I explain this...mmm." he started. He stood as he talked, putting on his jacket. "I'm not the type of guy to play games with girls so, this fabrication you made up about me isn't true. Also, I don't steal other guy's dates."

Her mouth was hanging open. "Did you really think that Harry and I made a good couple?" she asked incredulously. "I mean..._seriously_?"

"Unfortunately I did. Now, I think he can do better." he threw some money down on the table. "I don't think I can drive you home tonight. I'm sorry, but here's some money for a cab."

Patrick Woodhouse left a beautiful girl alone in a restaurant, something he thought he'd never have to do. It was safe to say that this date did not go as planned for anyone involved. Now, all he could picture was Harry suffering from the flu back at their apartment and Zoe, who was most likely waiting in the ER for no one.

When he got back home his phone rang. He didn't even look at the ID. He knew who it was.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" he cried.

"I told you so!" Zoe's voice was clear over the other line.

"I know you did!" said Patrick. "I really need to listen to you more often."

"That's what you always say!" she cried. "Did you know that no one on my team was injured tonight! No one!"

"I know!" Patrick said, his guilt mounting. "Jenna said she got someone to text you."

He heard Zoe groan on the other line.

"Where are you?" he asked.

"My apartment." she said. "And on top of it all, I have no idea what to do with Jenna's car!"

"That's right I forgot you had that." Patrick paused for a moment. "The least we could do is empty her gas tank for her. Want to go out for ice cream in the next county over?"

"I'll pick you up in five minutes."


	5. Chapter 5 : Hot Cousins and Stuttering

**Chapter 5: Hot Cousins and Stuttering**

"You know how lucky you are, man?" Taylor asked Patrick later that weekend.

He nodded. "Oh yeah. I know."

"If I were Harry I'd probably punch you in the face or something."

"Hey!" Patrick said. "It's not like I asked for Jenna to come on to me. Besides, I don't think Harry is capable of violence."

"Jenna Elton is insane and high maintenance. Everyone knows that." Taylor said befuddled.

"Yeah, everyone except for me apparently." said Patrick.

"Well, that just proves that you should listen to Zoe."

"Yeah, yeah. Everyone seems to be pointing that out to me these days."

The two were lounging on the couch in their apartment, avoiding work at all costs. Harry had just left for his weekly study group. Patrick and Taylor took advantage of this time alone to talk about the previous night's events and catch up on their lazy time in front of the television. Patrick grabbed the remote and started flipping through the channels at a leisurely pace. Images of cartoons, cola advertisements, and music videos flashed over the screen. He paused at a corny skin commercial.

"My skin used to be so dry," the enthusiastic young actress said, touching her face and flipping her shinny black hair over her shoulder. "But after using Clarity Products, it's smooth and silky!" A cheesy montage of her walking her dog, shopping with her girlfriends, and running on the beach followed.

"She's hot." Patrick commented, flipping the channel again.

"Yeah..." Taylor said awkwardly. "That was my cousin."

"What?!" Patrick cried, turning the channel back and catching the tail end of the advertisement. "Since when are you related to hot model slash actresses? If you were, how have you not shared this very important information with me earlier?"

Taylor raised his eyebrow. "First of all, can you stop calling her hot? She's my cousin and that's slightly creepy. Second of all, not only have I talked about her a lot, but you've met her."

Patrick crossed his arms. "I think I would've remembered meeting her, Taylor."

"Remember when I took you to my family reunion a few summers ago?" he asked.

"Sure." Patrick said.

"Remember my cousin Vanessa?" Taylor asked. Patrick's face was blank. "You know, the one who wore a lot of black?"

"Are you _serious_?!" he asked. "That was her?"

"Yup."

Patrick thought for a moment. "So," he said slowly. "when you were talking about your cousin who was starting school here this year you were talking about... her?"

"Yup." Taylor said casually.

"That hot girl in the commercial is your ex-emo cousin who is now a freshman at this university?" Patrick asked again just to make sure.

"Yup." Taylor repeated.

"Wow." Patrick sat back, astounded. "I learn something new everyday."

"Thank God for that." Taylor stole the remote from his friend.

"So when do I get to meet her?" Patrick asked, throwing Taylor a friendly punch. His roommate just glared at him, his expression clearly spelling out '_Don't even go there, Casanova.'_

Banging on their apartment door interrupted their lazy festivities. Patrick reluctantly got up from his position on the couch to look through the view hole.

"_Shit_!" he whispered, backing away from the door again. The banging continued.

"What?" Taylor asked form the couch.

"It's Ben Bates." Patrick said in a low, ominous tone. "I don't feel like dealing with him now."

"What does he want?"

Patrick shrugged, but could hear Ben start talking from the other side of their door.

"Hey guys!" he called with his slightly high-pitched voice. "Hey- I was- uh, uh...I wanted to...uh. Are you there? Hello?"

Patrick groaned loudly, but Taylor shh'd him.

"Hello?" Ben continued to plead outside. "I think I heard something- heard something in there. Are you there? Well, I-I-I guess I just wanted to tell you that I'm having a little uh, how do you say... a get together at my house next week. My friend is coming over and I- I...uh... well, you should come! Yeah..."

Ben Bates, their new neighbor was a friendly guy. No one could deny that fact. Still the friendliness came with a price. Not only did it take Ben about five years to get one sentence out of his mouth (something that bugged Patrick to no end), but his stalkerish qualities, though well-intended, were now on the brink of uncomfortable.

Just when Patrick thought they were off the hook, he heard another voice from behind his door...a more familiar one.

"Hi Ben! What are you doing out here?" he heard Zoe ask

"I- I-I..."

"If you want to talk with Patrick or Taylor, they're both home right now. I got off the phone with Patrick just a few minutes ago."

Damn it, Patrick cursed himself. Why must he always be in contact with his moral agent?

He heard keys jiggle and the door knob started moving. Taylor looked at Patrick and mouthed, '_She has a key? Seriously_?'

Before Patrick could run and hide, Zoe and Ben made their grand entrance into the apartment.

"Wow!" Patrick said in fake surprise. "Look who's here, Taylor! Were you guys knocking? I guess the T.V. was too loud."

"Sure..." Zoe said, placing down a pizza box. "I come bearing gifts. You can have some too, Ben."

"Gee- th-thanks." he sputtered, gawking at Zoe. Ben pushed his glasses back up his nose. They tended to slip down about every five seconds, and he was constantly adjusting them.

"No problem." she said. "I've been friends with guys long enough to know that keeping men fed is half the battle."

"So," Ben asked between sloppy mouthfuls. "Did you guys hear me out there? My fr-friend is coming in from out of t-town next week, if you want to..uh meet him."

"Thank sounds very nice, Ben." Zoe said sweetly.

"OK, well..." Ben said, backing away toward the door. "Guess I'll go now. B-bye."

After his usual awkward exit, Zoe turned back at Patrick and Taylor.

"OK," she said. "I'm officially ashamed of both of you."

"Hey, it was all Patrick, I swear." Taylor said, with his hands in the air.

"Traitor." Patrick mumbled. "But seriously, Zoe. You don't have to live in the same building with the guy. You don't understand."

"How hard is it to treat people with a basic level of respect and dignity?" she asked, crossing her arms.

"Must you always lecture me?"

"Must you always make me?"

Patrick shrugged, smiling. To be honest, there was always something entertaining about making Zoe mad. He could never quite put his finger on it. Maybe it was the way she tilted her head, or rolled her eyes at him. It could've been the way she furrowed her brow when she preached to him. Nevertheless, Patrick was constantly comforted by the fact that there was one person in the world who knew all of his faults, yet still managed to be friends with him without question. That was definitely something to be grateful for.


	6. Chapter 6 : Meet Jake Dias

**Chapter 6: Meet Jake Dias**

One of the benefits of attending a small school is the tight knit community. Of course, one of the downfalls of attending a small school is also the tight knit community. News travels so quickly that often times other people know more about your social life than you do at any given time. The environment takes getting used to; it was like an acquired taste. Harry, however, had not gotten used to it at all.

"People are staring at me."

"They're not staring at you, Harry."

"Do I have a neon rejection sign on my forehead?" he asked Patrick and Taylor, half panicked. "I feel like a leper."

Taylor patted him on the back. "Trust me, not many people know about you and Jenna. It's all in your head." Taylor sealed his well delivered white lie with a smile. He looked over at Patrick and gave him a not-so-subtle cue to say something encouraging too.

"Uh…" Patrick started, trying to think on his feet. "I mean, more than likely someone will do something really stupid here that will preoccupy everyone by tomorrow. Your gossip has a shelf life, my friend."

Taylor sighed. This was not what he had in mind. It was just too bad that people like Patrick Woodhouse were incapable of empathizing with insecurity.

The three boys were standing in the corner of Ben Bate's apartment. After much grumbling, they trudged their way to the top floor of their building. It nearly took the Jaws of Life to tear Patrick away from the video game he was playing. Harry was even less eager if that was possible. Going to a party meant being around people. Being around people meant facing the inevitable and painful drama follow-up from his disastrous date with Jenna again, calling Ben Bate's gathering a party might have been misleading. There was classical music playing faintly in the background with cheese and grape trays laid out neatly on the table. Everyone was drinking wine (Patrick made a face and stole some coke instead) and there was not a keg in sight. This was not unusual for Ben Bates. Patrick used to joke that his geekiness was because he was an engineering student, but Taylor (also an engineering student) seemed to take offense in the stereotype. In the end, the real reason was a mystery to all.

Harry straightened his plaid shirt , which Patrick noticed this was a staple in his wardrobe. He shoved his hands in his pockets nervously. Honestly, his shaking was causing more staring than anything.

"Dude, calm down." Patrick said, trying to be supportive. He grabbed a toothpick and shoved it in his face. "Here. Eat a piece of cheese. It will make you feel better."

Harry took it, but by his expression it was obvious that his appetite was dead.

"How much longer do you think we have to stay here?" Patrick leaned over and asked Taylor through gritted teeth.

"Pat, we've been here for like ten minutes." He answered.

"Really? I could've sworn it was longer." He mumbled.

"Who is the party for again? Ben's friend right?" Harry asked curiously.

Patrick rolled his eyes and opened his mouth to commence an impulsive rant.

"Don't get him started." Taylor chimed in, glaring at his friend. "Patrick has 'issues' with Jake Dias. He won't shut up about him. It's kind of annoying really…"

"Hey!" Patrick cried in his defense. "I don't hate him. I just…don't love him."

"Where is this guy?" Harry asked.

Patrick subtly motioned to the other side of the room where the man in question stood talking to an over excited Ben Bates. He was tall and muscular with pronounced features over his caramel skin. He was laughing at something Ben said, which seemed shocking to any average person who knew Ben Bates. Jake had very animated eyes. In the middle of his laughter his gaze traveled over to the three roommates. Patrick, Taylor, and Harry quickly averted their stares elsewhere in attempts to appear casual. Unfortunately, this guise failed miserably. A minute later, both Ben and Jake had traveled across the room.

"H-Hey you guys." Ben said with a steadier voice than usual. "This is, uh, Jake."

Jake smiled and shook each of their hands. To Patrick's dismay, his grip was just as strong as he remembered.

"Hey." Patrick said with as much friendliness as he could muster. "We've met before."

"Yeah." Jake said, pleased he remembered.

"Well, it's hard to forget you. Ben talks about you all the time." Taylor said.

"Do you go to school here?" Harry asked.

Jake shook his head, but before he got the chance to explain himself, Ben piped in. "Jake's j-just came back from a year in, uh Honduras."

Harry raised his eyebrows. "Wow, that's really something." Patrick secretly wanted to scowl at his friend's high praise.

"It was nothing." Jake said timidly.

Patrick grinned and put his arm around Jake, though it pained him to do so. "Aw, come on Jake. Don't be so modest." He gave him a good pat on the back, but it came out more like a harsh thud. Jake didn't seem to notice the subtle hostility in the gesture.

"It's very rewarding." He assured them. "Sometimes I feel I get more out of it than the students do."

"Students?" Taylor asked.

He nodded. "I teach English to high school age students in impoverished areas."

"He b-builds house too!" Ben beamed.

Jake's ears turned pink. "Yeah.." he admitted. "but it's great being home and seeing everyone again. Ben is letting me stay with him for a few months while I work."

For Patrick, Jake Dias was like that stomach ache he used to get late at night on Halloween after inhaling bags of candy. He was just too sweet to take in large portions. It was as if the guy left a bad aftertaste with you.

"Sooo…" Harry said to Patrick after the two left to speak to other guests. "That's the guy you hate?"

"Hate is a strong word." Patrick commented absentmindedly.

"What don't you like about him?"

"Umm…" That was a good question. "He's just so…_nice_." Patrick said the last word like it was cursed.

Taylor laughed. 'What's wrong with being nice?"

Patrick shrugged "Perfection is boring."

In truth, Jake was everything Patrick wasn't. He was patient, overly considerate, and idealistic. Patrick had mental images of Jake Dias saving puppies in rain-soaked boxes and helping old ladies with grocery bags. He didn't seem like a real person - more like a character from a Disney movie. Only someone so understanding and tolerant could live with Ben. Patrick's eyes defocused as he wondered to himself exactly how long Jake Dias would live two floors above him.

Patrick was snapped out of his reverie by his best friend's girlfriend.

"Hey boys!" Maggie's short dark curls bounced as she skipped over to Taylor's side and took his arm.

"Hey Maggie." Harry and Patrick said together.

Taylor gave her a quick peck as Patrick wolf whistled. Without warning, someone smacked him in the back of the head.

"You're so immature."

"Hi Zoe." He said without even turning around. She's smacked him in the back of the head enough times for him to interpret their meanings. That amount of force was playful. Patrick was grateful, for he was sure that if she wanted to Zoe could do some serious damage.

She walked up and took a place in the circle between Harry and Patrick, giving the first a friendly punch.

"Nice to see you out and about, Harry." She said.

Patrick was thankful when he smiled back genuinely. "You know what? The night's gone pretty well so far." He confessed, finally loosening up.

After Harry was at ease, everyone else followed suit. Much to Patrick's surprise, the night was fairly enjoyable. Ben and Jake came over and spoke to them again as they made the rounds to all of their guests. Zoe was perfectly polite, as usual. Patrick noticed that his friend tended to be the perfect picture of composure and civility in any social situation.

"So I hear you're in the education school." Jake said, turning to her and smiling warmly.

She nodded and brushed some red hair off her face gracefully. "Yeah. I'm doing secondary education."

"Do you know what subject?"

"History." She said. "Definitely history."

"That's fascinating." Jake said, leaning in closer to her. "I think high school is a great age group to teach."

"Zoe's sure got the bossy part down." Patrick joked.

Zoe pretended not to hear her friend, but Jake just chuckled.

"You have to be bossy to gain respect. Trust me." He said.

Patrick was starting to feel awkward. He felt caught between the two conversations between Jake and Zoe and the other group. He stood there, tapping his cup for a few minutes before escaping. Patrick Woodhouse wasn't used to feeling awkward.

"I'm going to get some wine." He announced to no one in particular. Honestly, he just wanted an excuse to move.

He strode over to the kitchen by himself and stared at the different bottles with disgust. He eventually decided on simple tap water. After filling his cup, he turned and saw a familiar face staring at him with an eyebrow raised.

"Sup Knightley." He said, taking a sip.

"Honestly," she said. "You're so disturbed by Jake's company that you'd rather be a loner in the kitchen?"

"I was thirsty!"

She laughed. "Pat, you hate wine." She pointed to the clear liquid in his cup.

Sometimes he really hated that she knew him so well. "Yeah, yeah."

"It wouldn't kill you, you know." She said, leaning against the counter.

"What?"

"Being nice to Jake Dias."

Honestly, that item was not on Patrick Woodhouse's to do list, but he complied anyway. In his experience, Zoe Knightley tended to be right. It was rather annoying.

"Can I still make fun of him on special occasions?" he asked with his classic grin.

Zoe sighed but smiled. "Oh Patrick…" was all she said. She refilled her cup and started to exit the kitchen. At the last minute she stopped and turned around. "By the way, you can pick me up at three-thirty tomorrow afternoon."

"What for?"

"Cake tasting, of course!"

The last thing Zoe saw before leaving the room was Patrick's face lit up like a small child on Christmas Day. Tomorrow was going to be very interesting.


	7. Chapter 7 : Cake Tasting

**Chapter 7: Cake Tasting  
**

Picking cake is a serious business. There are flavors, textures, consistency, and decorating to take into account. The decision should never be taken lightly – especially for a wedding. This, at least, was Patrick Woodhouse's life philosophy. As the best man, he felt it was only fair to give his brother an extra set of taste buds on this special day.

"We're early." Zoe said when they strolled into the caterer's with thirty minutes to spare.

"But I want cake!" he cried, staring at the display cases with a twinkle in his eye. "This is going to be an amazing day…"

"We have to wait for our siblings, Pat." She reminded him. "Practice some restraint, please."

He smiled his usual crooked smile – the one that tended to make his best friend nervous. Patrick walked over to the welcome desk and leaned over it casually. When the receptionist got off the phone she gave him a very business-like look.

"How may I help you?" she asked tartly, chewing her gum and surveying the young man in front of her with scrutiny.

"I'm Mr. Woodhouse and this is my fiancé. We're here for our tasting today." He said smoothly.

She narrowed her eyes. "You're here early."

"I'm very punctual." He said. "Right sweetie?"

Zoe looked at him with eyebrows raised. "Who said I was marrying you?"

The receptionist chuckled at that, reading Zoe's statement as sarcasm. "I like you, sweetie!" she said to her. "You've got spunk."

Patrick pulled Zoe into his side. Draping his long arm over her shoulders, he puckered his lips and smacked them against her cheek. "She sure is." He beamed.

Zoe turned a shade of red that was very close to her hair. She mumbled something inaudible.

Still laughing, the receptionist got up and led the 'happy couple' into the dining room.

Patrick pulled out Zoe's chair for her. "_Madam_…"

"_Sir_…" she said, sitting down daintily.

"Am I a genius or what?" he asked, smirking.

Zoe folded her arms across her chest. "If I recall, Mr. Woodhouse, I'm the one who softened her up."

"Sure, sure you did something."

Their conversation was abruptly interrupted when a female waiter came in with a tray of plates, each decorated with a slice of cake. Patrick's eyes practically popped out of his head. Mouth watering, his eyes rolled over the different flavors: chocolate, white chocolate, Italian cream, Irish cream….

"It's so unfair." Zoe said five minutes later.

Somehow between massive mouthfuls, Patrick managed to answer her. So preoccupied with the task at hand, he'd almost forgotten he had company at the table. "What's unfair?"

"You can eat your weight in cake and nothing happens to you! Boys make me sick."

"Eat up, darling." He said, pointing to a white cake with butter cream frosting. "Boys like girls with meat on their bones."

"You're supposed to take small bites." She reminded him.

Patrick conveniently employed his selective hearing as he devoured another piece of cake.

"Hey," he asked, a moment later. "Which flavor do you think Jake Dias would like?"

"How am I supposed to know that?" she asked desperately.

"Just guess."

"I don't know…lemon?" She answered, picking a random flavor.

He made a face at the cake he was eating. "I _hate_ lemon cake. What bad taste that man has." He said, pushing the yellow piece of cake toward her place setting.

"Wow…" the waitress said when she came out again to check on them. With wide eyes she looked at the empty plates she'd brought out only minutes before. "Wow."

Patrick made an innocent puppy sort of face. Zoe scowled. She knew exactly what Patrick was about to do. She'd seen it enough times to pick up on his technique.

"Are you impressed?" he joked, looking up at her.

The waitress was older than them, but she couldn't have been more than twenty-five. When Patrick looked at her she blushed slightly and cleared her throat.

_Here we go_, Zoe thought.

"I am." The waitress said. "I hope you and your …fiancé… found a favorite." She gave Zoe a sort of once-over. It's a common, yet effective move for the competitive female.

Patrick chuckled. "Oh her?" he asked, giving his friend a playful punch. "She's not the bride. She's my sister! We're meeting our brother for a taste test, but he's late."

"You two don't look alike." She commented.

"_Thank God for that_." Zoe mumbled.

"But you're right about one thing," Patrick said, leaning toward the waitress. She smiled and looked down at him. "We haven't found a favorite yet. They were all just so good. I hate to ask, but would it be possible for-"

"I'll come out with more samples." She said, anticipating his question.

Patrick beamed. "That would be lovely."

She winked at him and gathered the empty plates. Once she had exited the dining room, Zoe stepped on his foot hard under the table.

"Ow!" he cried. "Zoe, I'm beginning to think we have an abusive relationship."

"You're disguising." She said, half laughing. "Do you realize that?"

"Kind of." He admitted.

Zoe sat back in her chair. "I should be offended, you know. One minute we're getting married and the next you're flirting with someone right in front of me."

"You'll forgive me." He said confidently.

"Yeah, probably." She confessed.

All of a sudden, Zoe's face was possessed with a mischievous expression. In front of her place setting was the rest of the lemon piece of cake Patrick had pushed in front of her. She lifted her hands nonchalantly from her lap.

"Hey Patrick, there's something else we didn't think about as far as cake judgment goes. It's very important to the whole wedding ceremony."

"What?" he challenged. "That's impossible. I've done my research and I'm totally experienced in all things concerning baked goods."

Zoe swiped a dab of white frosting with her pointer finer and stared at it. "It needs to have proper stickiness and staying power." she said seriously.

"Stickiness? What are you – HEY!"

Not giving him a chance to escape, Zoe smashed the lemony goodness in Patrick's face with her bare hands. She rubbed it in for good measure, too.

"Ew!" he cried. "I have Jake Dias cake on me!"

"_What are you DOING?_"

Zoe stopped laughing abruptly. To see what was going on, Patrick wiped the white goo from his face and found himself staring into the cold hard eyes of the real bride to be.

"Hi Sarah." Zoe said feebly.

"Explain." She said, putting her hands on her hips. Patrick's brother Kyle was standing next to his fiancé, not saying anything. Still, Patrick was willing to bet he was more amused than his future wife, but was very skilled at hiding it.

"Uh…" Patrick started. "We were testing the flavors and we got carried away."

"I see that."

"Maybe you two should clean yourselves up." Kyle chimed in. "Sarah and I will take it from here."

Zoe and Patrick took that as their cue to slip out to the restrooms. They'd both learned over the past few months of planning that for safety reasons, it was best not to mess around with Sarah. This bride meant business.

"Whatever you do, don't get the lemon!" Patrick called behind his shoulder before they left the dining room. "It's pretty nasty."


	8. Chapter 8 : Harry's Education

**Harry's Education **

After a weekend of minimal studying and maximum cake intake, Patrick Woodhouse was ready to get back in the game and pour all of his efforts into a charitable project: Harry Smith. Harry was lovable, awkward, and tragically unnoticed by every female on earth (expect for his mother, who Patrick noted called about twice a day). No, something had to be done and Patrick Woodhouse was the person to do it. He had the skills and experience to impart to this less fortunate lad. After all, with a job already secure and his grades miraculously steady, he didn't have anything else to do these days except to better mankind.

That is exactly what Patrick intended to do at 9pm that night at O'Grady's. Then again, since the ripe age of eight Patrick Woodhouse had embraced tardiness. Most of his acquaintance knew this, but apparently Harry hadn't grown used to it. Patrick's protégé was left waiting for a good ten minutes. It was a sad site, really. The poor boy had his back to the bar counter in an attempt to look casual, though his eyes were darting back and forth from both entrances to see if Patrick had finally arrived. There was something about Harry – it could've been in height or the way he constantly bit his lip – but he had a nervous air about him. In defeat, he leaned backwards against the counter, but his arm knocked a glass to the floor. Typical. He was always breaking things.

"Don't worry, I've got it!" the bartender cried, rushing over before Harry could jump over and help.

"Ah gosh – I'm so sorry!" It was then that Harry spotted a broom leaning against the opposite wall. He hurried over and grabbed it in an attempt to be helpful. "Here!" he said thrusting it forward.

The bartenred straightened up and Harry gulped. How had he not realized she was a girl? Usually, Harry could spot those basics. She smiled very nicely at him and took the broom.

"Thank you…"

"Harry." He finished. "That's me. I'm Harry."

Her smiled widened. He didn't know whether she was laughing with or at him. Still, something about the smile was kind. By appearance alone, she was certainly an interesting girl. She had thick framed glassed and very blue eyes. Her mousy brown hair was swept out of her face and highlighted by a very bright headband. Her small diamond nose ring also caught his eye.

"How about that! My name is Mary, so that will be easy for you to remember." She said, extending her hand. "Break glasses often?"

"No! I mean, I can pay for it if you like!" He insisted.

She laughed. "No worries, Harry. This happens all the time. It's really no big deal."

"I seem to leave a path of death and destruction everywhere I go." He mumbled. Mary must have heard him because she started giggling.

Harry cleared his throat. Rarely did he make someone of the opposite sex laugh when it didn't involve embarrassment on his part. This was refreshing.

"You waiting for someone, Harry?" she asked, scooping up the rest of the glass.

"Yeah, just a friend."

"Really? What's her name? Maybe I know her."

"Oh!"Harry said. "No, it's my friend Patrick. He's a guy."

"That makes sense." She said, amused. Mary threw the glass pieces in the trash. "Can I get you a drink while you wait for your buddy?"

"If it's not too much trouble." He said.

"I am a bartender." Mary pointed out. "It would be my pleasure."

Harry grinned and his eyes averted down. "Your hand is bleeding!" he cried, gazing at the small cut on her finger.

"Wow- I didn't even notice!" Marry said.

Before she could excuse herself, Harry pulled out his wallet and took out a band aid. Mary, unnoticed by him, raised her eyebrows in pleasant surprise. It wasn't everyday you met a boy who carried band aids in his wallet.

"Uh –" he started, figuring an explanation was in order. "Like I said, I get in scrapes a lot."

"Well, it's best to be prepared." Mary said playfully. "Thank you."

Harry opened the bandage and carefully wrapped in around her finer. Concentrating on the task at hand, he didn't see his subject blush lightly when he touched her.

"Harry!"

The two whipped their heads around to see the very reason for this interlude. The very tardy, very suave Patric strolled into the bar and spotted his friend.

"Hey, Pat!" Harry called back, turning away from Mary.

"Sorry I'm late." He said. "Were you waiting long?"

"Uh – no."

"Good, good." He spotted Mary standing in front of them. "Could we get two Millers please? Thanks."

Patrick swiveled his chair and turned his back to her. Mary paused for a minute and looked back at Harry but it was obvious that she no longer held his attention. She cleared her throat.

"Coming right up." She said in defeat, grabbing some glasses.

"Alright," Patrick said to Harry. "Tonight it all begins."

"What begins?"

"I've decided to help you."

"Uh.." Harry was still not following. "Help me with what exactly?"

"Life!"

Harry blinked. That was a rather broad category.

"Women, specifically." Patrick explained, taking one of the beers Mary had set down in front of them.

"What makes you think I need help with women?" Harry challenged. "I mean, you don't have a girlfriend and you're just fine."

"Ah, but that's different." Patrick explained. "See, I don't want a girlfriend."

Harry looked skeptical. "Seriously?"

"Dead serious. Girlfriends want commitment. Girlfriends want cuddling, talking, and fighting. Girlfriends want you to tell them how skinny they are and they want to take you home to their folks. I am not that guy. _You_ are that guy."

"I am that guy?"

"Hell yeah!" Patrick said. "Girls just don't see it. They're blind to your charms."

"My charms?"

"Sure!" he said. "You're smart, nice, and dependable. You just need to express your confidence. This is where I will come in. The first step will be getting you comfortable talking to women."

"I can talk to women!" Harry defended. "I talk to Zoe all the time."

Patrick rolled his eyes. "Zoe doesn't count. She's not a real woman."

"That's news to me!"

"No, I mean…" Patrick paused. "She's just different."

Harry sighed and took his glass. "I guess I could work on some conversational skills."

Patrick smiled and patted him on the back. "See? This won't be so bad."

Harry wasn't so sure of that. In fact, a part of his brain was predicting things would go very, very badly.

"Well," said Patrick. "Tomorrow Zoe and I will take you shopping."

Harry nearly spit out his drink. "Shopping? What for?"

"Well," he started carefully. "Harry, it's not that I don't love the whole small-town-flannel-shirt-thing you've got going on. I just thought it might be good to…broaden your horizons."

The two finished their beers and talked strategy. Well, Patrick talked strategy and Harry mostly listened. When they left, Harry couldn't find Mary to say goodbye so he made sure to throw an extra couple of dollars in the tip jar. It was the least he could do.

* * *

"Guys, are you sure about this leather? It's very…uh…_thick_."

At present, Harry was barricaded in a dressing room at the mall. Zoe and Patrick kept throwing items over his door for him the try on. After about an hour he'd accumulated enough collared shirts, sports coats, polos, and slacks to clothe an entire fraternity. The avalanche just kept coming.

"Trust me, Harry. You'll look great in it!" Patrick called from the other side of his door. For the past few minutes he'd been switching back and forth between reassuring Harry and arguing with Zoe.

"I can't believe you dragged me here." She mumbled, grabbing more hangers around her. There was something every focused about Zoe when she shopped. It never ceased to amaze Patrick how efficiently she could walk through a store and grab just the right pieces within a matter of minutes. He got up from his chair and started to follow and as she made another round for Harry.

"I just thought your input would be valuable." He pointed out, still on her heels.

She turned sharply. "No, I get that. What I don't get is why you're doing this in the first place. The last time I checked Harry was happily clothed."

"Yes, but I'm helping him realize his full potential with the opposite sex."

She scowled. "Patrick, what does that even mean? What makes you think you could 'improve' Harry? Why can't you just leave him alone?"

"No offense to you and your sex, Zoe, but I've noticed that girls don't really go for the nice guys in the hand-me-downs, if you get my drift."

"Oh come on!" she cried. "OK, some girls are shallow. Jenna Elton, for example, is as shallow as a baby pool. Still, has it ever occurred to you that Harry might find a great girl on his own – without your help and without my fashion sense?"

Patrick paused. That hadn't occurred to him.

"Look," Zoe continued, trying to balance her pile. Patrick grabbed it from her and she nodded in thanks. "Patrick, I'm not saying that you don't have good intentions, because you do. I just think that you might be doing some harm by changing him."

"Just trust me on this one, Zoe. OK?"

She sighed and put her hands on her hips. "Fine. I'll trust you. _For now_."

He smiled broadly at her acceptance. "Excellent."

He walked over to the dressing room door and threw the last pile over it. He heard a soft yelp from the other side.

"You OK, man?" he asked.

"Yes!" Harry said.

"Do you want to come out?" Zoe asked.

There was a pause.

"Oh come on, Harry! Let's see it!" Patrick said, banging on the door impatiently.

The doorknob quivered and he finally emerged from the cave. Patrick's smile widened and Zoe's eye brows rose.

Say what you will about Patrick Woodhouse. He might have been devious, arrogant, and overly confident, but he could certainly follow through. Harry looked very polished and put together on the outside. He was still biting his lip, but nothing could be done about that. He was sporting a white collared shirt and slacks with a pair of shoes Zoe had picked out. For the first time, his height seemed to be working with and not against him. His shoulders seemed broader too. All in all, the transformation was impressive.

Patrick smirked in Zoe's direction and leaned in to her. "I hate to say _I told you _so but…"

She punched him in the arm before he could finish gloating.


	9. Chapter 9 : Meet Cousin Vanessa

**Meet Cousin Vanessa**

Contrary to all the stereotypes normally attached to adorable and charming young men, Patrick Woodhouse was actually very intelligent. Long ago he decided to keep this detail private. It wasn't difficult. People tended to assume his looks and charisma compensated for an average (or below average) brain size. Then again, these people didn't know he was double majoring in Economics and Philosophy with a solid GPA of 3.94. In fact, when he drove Zoe crazy (which was often) she would threaten to publicize his real SAT score. That usually shut him up.

Also, contrary to popular belief, Patrick Woodhouse did attend class. Sure, he skips every so often, but what self respecting senior doesn't? It was his right – no, his duty. In fact, he would've skipped class that very day if Taylor hadn't thrown his covers off and opened his blinds a few minutes before class.

"Why do people insist on waking me up this way? First Zoe, then you…can't a guy have an ounce of privacy?" he asked, trudging into the living room of their apartment after he'd thrown on some clothes.

"I thought you might need a nudge in the right direction." Taylor answered.

"And what direction would that be?"

"Towards class."

Patrick ruffled his curly hair into its usual stylish messiness. One blessing men take for granted everyday is their ability to look decent in under ten minutes.

"I guess I might as well." He said. "I _am_ awake."

When Patrick rolled through the doorway for his 10am political theory seminar, there was a noticeable look of surprise on his professor's face.

"Good morning Mr. Woodhouse. It's been quite a while." she said with her hands on her hips.

"I just couldn't stay away!" He offered her one of his signature smiles. It seemed to thaw her, but only a bit.

He took the only empty seat left in the front row. Usually, Patrick would avoid such a hot spot, but he didn't really have a choice. One good thing about this situation was the girl sitting to his right. He casually glanced in her direction. Something about her seemed familiar. Her dark eyes turned toward him and the corners of her pink mouth turned up. She looked back down at her book while gathering her long black hair into a silky ponytail, exposing her pale, creamy skin. Patrick cleared his throat and tried to remember why he didn't come to class more often.

"Mr. Woodhouse? Hello?"

He straightened up and looked forward again. His professor was obviously displeased.

"I'm sorry. I missed that." He said sheepishly.

"Mr. Woodhouse." She said crisply. "I asked which of Walter Lippmann's points struck you most in your reading for today."

"_Reading for today_?"

"Yes, Mr. Woodhouse. You looked like you had an opinion."

He hesitated and glanced to his right again. Now was not the time to look stupid. "I do have an opinion! I'm so glad you asked!" He exclaimed.

"Excellent." She said, still skeptical. "What is it?"

"Right. Well…" he racked his brain. Lippmann…Lippmann…after over three years of skimming and speed reading the name sounded every familiar. He could almost feel the answer on the tip of his tongue.

"Mr. Woodhouse, we're waiting." She said.

It was as if a bell dinged inside his head. He looked around and smiled before answering. "To be honest," Patrick started in a confident voice. "I was struck by his pessimistic view of the public in the democratic system. Lippmann seemed to imply that there is a sense of inevitability concerning the pollution of political communication in this country. It reminded me of Plato's _allegory of the cave._ We, as average citizens, are doomed to judge from and act on mere shadows of truth and not reality itself. One point I'd like to bring up is whether this pessimism still stands in our new media environment. With political information available through an active, infinite, and participatory medium like the internet to supplement the 'shadows' we take in, have we perhaps created the tools to see beyond them?"

Silence covered the classroom for a few seconds.

"Was that what you were look for?" he asked the professor.

Her eyes widened and she spoke to the whole class. "Patrick brings up a good point." She said, though her sentence rang with surprise. "Would anyone like to elaborate?"

Patrick spoke when he felt like it or when no one else knew the answer. The rest of his forty eight minutes of class time was spent doodling geometric shapes on his paper pad.

"Mr. Woodhouse." His professor called out to him as he packed up. "You did well today."

"Thanks!" he said. He couldn't help but be a little proud.

"You know what this means, don't you?" she asked slyly.

"No."

"Now that I know what you're capable of, I will expect this kind of participation and attendance every week."

_Great._

"Good class today." He said, trying not to groan. "See you next week."

Swinging his backpack over his shoulder, he strutted out of the room with his usual confidence. As he walked down the hall another voice caught his attention.

"You seem to know a lot for someone who never comes to class."

He turned around and came face to face with the desk neighbor which had captured his attention earlier.

"I usually sit in the back." He explained, smiling warmly at her.

"Liar!" she teased. "I rarely see you and when you come you're half dead."

"It's early!"

"Not that early." She insisted.

"I'm Patrick, by the way." He said, holding out his hand.

She took it confidently and returned his grip. "I know."

"You know?"

"Yeah." Her dark eyes sparkled. "You're Taylor's roommate. I'm his cousin."

Patrick stood dumbstruck. Of course! How had he not seen it? The black hair, smile, and perfect skin! He'd seen her on television for god's sake. Patrick Woodhouse never forgot a pretty face.

"Then you're Vanessa!" he cried. "Taylor and I saw your ad the other day."

Two rosy spots appeared on her perfect face. "Gosh, it's so embarrassing. You have no idea."

"No way, it was great! In fact, I rushed out and bought some cleanser right after. You can ask Taylor. You were inspiring."

She laughed and hugged her books to her chest. "Well thanks!"

"Hey, how come you haven't come to visit us yet?" Patrick said, opening the door for her. The two ventured outside the building and into the sunshine. He couldn't help but notice the way it made her long hair shine perfectly.

"I've been pretty busy." She said. "Lately I've been traveling into the city on weekends for different photo shoots, but I did my last one this past Saturday. I should have more free time the rest of the semester."

"Excellent." Patrick said. "You can start tonight! It's Taylor's birthday so a couple of friends are coming over to the apartment to celebrate."

"Are you sure it's OK?" she asked. She looked up at him through her long eyelashes. "He didn't exactly invite me. I wouldn't want to impose"

"You're family!" Patrick cried. "I bet he meant to. I swear, that roommate of mine can be so scatterbrained!"

"Who else do you think will be there?" she asked casually.

"Some of Maggie's friends, our roommate Harry, and a few other people who live in our building. You should totally come! Bringing you can be my birthday gift. See, now I don't have to buy him anything!"

Vanessa smiled again. "OK, I think I'll come. I do love surprising people."

Inside, Patrick was doing a happy dance. It took a lot for a girl to catch his eye these days. Usually, they all looked the same to him. They wear the same clothes, get the same haircuts, buy the same coveted handbags, talk the same way, and even whine the same way. It's cliché. It's boring. Then again, there was something about Vanessa that wasn't boring at all. Every year Patrick's expectations seemed to get higher and higher and no one seemed to fit them. Now a gorgeous model slash actress was smiling coyly up at him. _Life was good._

"So, where do you live?" she asked.

Patrick thought on his feet. "Well…our apartment is hard to find. Why don't I pick you up from your dorm and drive you?"

"How sweet." She said, touching his arm. "I live in Harrison Dormitory."

He winked at her. "I'll remember."

Patrick Woodhouse felt very pleased with himself as he walked away from Vanessa. It was a beautiful day. He had gotten up before noon. He'd even participated in class. On top of it all, he met a very interesting girl. This had been an unusually productive morning.

He went to the library and, following his routine, let his mind wander to nonacademic subjects. Patrick couldn't help but think that if he was ready for monogamous commitment – _which he wasn't _– someone like Vanessa would fit the bill very nicely. She was beautiful, petite, confident, and playful. What more could he ask for? Of course, being the classy guy he was, he would never ever make a move on his best friend's younger cousin without some sort of blessing. Patrick was bold but not stupid. Still, it didn't mean he couldn't think about, right?

Right?


	10. Chapter 10 : Surprises All Around

**Chapter 10: Surprises All Around**

Across campus Taylor and Harry were engrossed in their Friday afternoon video game ritual. Harry's thumbs were moving at lightening speed, eyes calm and focused. Taylor was a more physical gamer – often jumping up in victory or giving the occasional angry throw at the T.V. screen.

"They're such animals." Maggie mumbled, half amused.

"Yes, it's miraculous what the opposable thumb has led to." Zoe remarked, bending down to pick a dirty sock off the floor.

The two girls were working around the boys, going through the apartment, setting up decorations and clearing away rubble in preparation for Taylor's birthday party that night. It wasn't until the vacuum turned on that Taylor and Harry noticed their presence.

"Hey look!" Taylor said with pleasant surprise. "They're cleaning!"

"Don't get used to it!" Maggie warned her boyfriend over the roaring of the machine.

Taylor chucked and sat back in his chair. "I love my birthday."

Just a few hours later the apartment was transformed. The stains were gone, the soda can rings were erased, and the general boy smell had been successfully masked. The furniture had been pushed against the walls to accommodate the huge crowd that was now roaming about the boys' apartment.

"I didn't know I had this many friends!" Taylor said smiling, basking in all the attention.

Maggie went on tip-toe to kiss him on the cheek. "Happy Birthday." She said warmly, squeezing his arm.

"Aren't you two just adorable?" Zoe said from behind them.

The couple whipped around to see their mutual friend emerge from Patrick's room wearing a strapless black dress.

Maggie's eyebrow went up an inch. "Woah, sweetheart. Who are you trying to impress?"

Zoe blushed deeply and shrugged. "I don't always have to be wearing a jersey and kilt, do I? Can't a girl dress up once and a while?"

Maggie gave Taylor a secretive, knowing look but didn't say another word.

The friends split up, making the rounds among the guests. Some, of course, were more sober than others but luckily the girls had thought ahead and protected the breakables and electronics. All in all the party was going very well. The music was good, the drama minimal, and the energy high. At this point very few things could have dented Taylor's birthday experience. Unfortunately, this was a false sense of security. His bubble was popped by an unexpected appearance.

"Vanessa?!" his cry was overshadowed by the background song. Only Zoe, who had been standing right near him, heard Taylor. "Oh my god!"

_Yes_, there was Patrick Woodhouse – swaggering in with a petite, raven-haired model on his arm. Taylor, of course, was more concerned with the fact that this model was his eighteen-year-old cousin.

"Hey, Taylor! Happy birthday!" Patrick strode over and hugged his friend. Taylor's jaw was down and no words were coming out of his mouth. Zoe stared silently at the awkwardness and not helping herself, glanced over that this mysterious girl clinging to her best friend's arm.

"Hi Taylor!" Vanessa said, hugging her cousin as soon as Patrick was done. "I bet you're surprised to see me, uh?"

"You bet." He croaked out.

"Can you believe it?" Patrick asked, patting his friend's back. "She hadn't heard about the party. I thought I'd invite her and introduce this freshman to the real scene at this school."

The proclamation of this girl's age caused Zoe Knightley's eyes to widen unpleasantly. Patrick's grin began to fade once he spotted her expression. He didn't quite know why, but a wave of guilt sweept over him and the realization of what he had just sprung on his best friend set in.

"Uh – " he said nervously. "Why don't we get you a drink – an non alcoholic drink!" he corrected quickly. He grabbed Vanessa's hand and led her quickly to the kitchen. Knowing Taylor, he'd need time to process.

He handed his guest a cup of diet coke. She smiled sweetly at him and tossed her hair over her shoulder.

"Thanks. That wasn't too awkward, was it?" she asked mischievously.

Patrick sighed. "Give him a few minutes. I guess he feels guilty for exposing you to all this."

Vanessa chuckled and stepped closer to Patrick. "Patrick, I work in New York most of the time. Do you and Taylor really think I'm completely innocent?"

Her dark eyes flashed at him and Patrick felt like squirming. There was something about the way she spoke in her graceful, direct style that made confidence ooze out with every word.

"So," she continued, moving her glance around the room nonchalantly. "Who's here? Give me the low down on the room."

Patrick gave her the highlights, pointing out Maggie, Harry, and some other people in their circle of friends. He even pointed out Ben Bates from across the room. Ho stood out awkwardly against the crowd, making sweeping hand gestures and odd dance movements.

"Who is that – next to Ben?" Vanessa asked casually.

"Oh." Patrick said shortly. "That's just Jake." Oh yes, Jake Dias was there. Patrick rolled his eyes like a bad habit.

Vanessa caught this and laughed. "Boring or uptight?" she asked.

"Both, in my opinion. The man's a saint."

"Oh really." Her eyes sparkled. "What makes you say that? Does he travel the world, teaching and preaching to make it a better place?"

"Yeah, that's pretty much it."

"And who is that girl next to him?" she asked.

Patrick strained his neck. "Which one?"

"That pretty red-haired one. She's talking to Jake now."

Patrick squinted and finally saw who Vanessa meant. "Ohhhhhh!" he said laughing. "That's just Zoe!"

Across the room Zoe was absorbed in conversation. She was probably talking about something extremely important and serious. What else could you talk about with Jake?

After about an hour at the party, Vanessa excused herself to go meet some new people. Patrick let her go off on her own. It gave him an opportunity to sink down in his favorite chair and think about how he could patch things up with Taylor. He felt the weight shift on the chair and caught a glimpse of red hair out of the corner of his eye. He had a visitor.

"Well?" he asked, just waiting for the bomb to be dropped.

"What?" Zoe asked, sipping a glass of wine.

"Aren't you going to yell at me?"

He heard her laugh. "I'm not saying anything, Patrick."

He crossed his arms and let his head fall back. "Yeah. I guess you didn't have to."

Zoe hid a small smile of satisfaction and decided to walk away form her friend and let him marinate in guilt. Patrick Woodhouse may lack tact, but with some time and encouragement he made things right in his own way. She had every confidence that Taylor would be getting an extra special birthday breakfast the next day.

* * *

The morning light hit Taylor's eyelids like a jet stream. He cried out in pain and threw his covers over his face.

"What's happening?" he groaned beneath his sheets.

"Rise and shine, Buddy!" a familiar voice called out. Patrick had run in to Taylor's room and flung his curtains open with a level of enthusiasm that his friend could not meet.

"Is it early or am I hung over?" he asked.

"Both!"

Taylor blinked and sat up slowly. His senses were beginning to register a change. "Do I smell…bacon?"

"Yes!" Patrick said happily. "Bacon, biscuits, scrambled eggs, fresh fruit and those little cinnamon rolls you love so much."

"Whoa…"

The thing about Patrick Woodhouse – which Taylor had learned ever since their first major disagreement in middle school – was that he was a peacemaker. His unfortunate attraction to mistakes also came with the convenient gift of fixing things. This breakfast was yet another display of that talent.

Patrick led his drowsy friend to the kitchen and poured him a glass of freshly squeezed orange juice. Harry was already sitting at the table, fully dressed and reading the paper at 8 a.m. on a Saturday. Basically, he was a freak of nature.

"Did you have fun last night?" Harry asked Taylor.

"I did!" he said, now staring at the full plate of food Patrick had just placed in front of him. "This food should help with the headache."

"Anything for you, Taylor!" Patrick cried. Taylor just noticed his "Kiss the chef" apron and snorted into his juice. Clearly, Patrick was experiencing some seriously guilt.

"Patrick…." Taylor said between mouthfuls. "I've decided to forgive you. You can take the apron off and come eat with me."

Patrick looked up from the stove and smiled with relief.

"I really am sorry, Taylor." he said. "I shouldn't have brought Vanessa. I have no idea what I was thinking…"

Harry raised his eyebrows. Even he could venture a guess as to what Patrick had been thinking.

"It's ok." Taylor assured his friend. "I was being overprotective. Plus, I hadn't seen her in a while. In a way, I should be thanking you."

That last sentence made Patrick Woodhouse beam. All was well in the world. He was at peace with Taylor and his scrambled eggs were perfectly cooked.

"BUT –" Taylor cried, spotting his friend's satisfaction. "You absolutely are NOT allowed to date her." He pointed his fork at Patrick as a warning before stabbing a strawberry on his plate.

Patrick's arms were raised in defense. "You have my word as a gentleman, Taylor."

"Yeah…that's what I'm worried about."

Taking Taylor out for an afternoon at the driving range was the cherry on top of Patrick's orchestrated apology. Harry had to pass because of job hunting, but it gave Patrick and Taylor time to catch-up. Between Maggie, Patrick's new interest in Harry's life, and school quality time had been hard to come by during senior year.

As usual, Taylor displayed perfect form at the driving range. Patrick was usually a hit or miss golf player, not willing to invest the same amount of time into the game as his friend.

"So I'm guessing from the massive party she threw you last night that things between you and Maggie are good." Patrick said, setting up his shot.

"Oh yeah." Taylor said. "Never better." He adjusted his stance and followed through perfectly. Patrick watched with a twinge of jealousy. "Zoe helped too, you know."

"Oh yeah."

"She looked nice last night."

"Who?" Patrick asked.

"Zoe!"

"Oh. Ok, sure. I didn't notice. She always looks that way."

Taylor smiled. "Maggie has a theory."

"A philosophical theory?" Patrick asked.

"No. She thinks that someone has _finally_ caught Zoe's eye."

Patrick rolled his eyes. Everyone knew that Zoe was not boy crazy. She refreshing in that way. "What on earth are you talking about?" he asked, starting to swing his club back.

"Jake Dias."

Patrick's club missed and hit the astroturf square hard. He felt the metal driver vibrate violently in his hands.

"Excuse me?" he asked calmly.

"Jake Dias." Taylor said again.

After getting over the initial shock, Patrick started to laugh uncontrollably. To him, this whole concept was hysterical.

"Tell Maggie she's nuts!" he said, grabbing his side.

"I don't think she's that crazy. It's not any of my business and I really don't care that much, but the facts are there – Zoe Knightley doesn't wear a dress for no reason."

Patrick stopped laughing. The man had a point.


	11. Chapter 11 : Ice Cream Flirting

**Chapter 11: Ice Cream Flirting**

Patrick Woodhouse was weak like most men, but he stayed true to his word. He refrained from entering into any casual or formal romantic situation with his friend's cousin. Vanessa did not make this easy, however. Ever since the party she began hanging in their apartment building. She would stop by for casual visits in the evening and tag around Patrick after their class. It also didn't help that she wore tight-fitting clothing and short hemlines. Sometimes Patrick would catch Zoe rolling her eyes at Vanessa's appearance when she joined their circle of friends for outings. This amused him, but he didn't comment on it out loud. After a few months Vanessa found a comfortable place amongst her cousin's friends. She even spent some time with Ben and Jake.

Now that his misunderstanding with Taylor was behind them, Patrick could refocus his energy on Harry. He happily noticed female heads turn from his friend's new look. Now that the car was waxed, it was time to fix the engine.

"When you meet a girl, don't let her know you're interested right away." he explained to his friend over lunch at the dining hall. "You have to let her come to you. It's like fishing – lay out the bait and let her bite."

"Wait – I'm confused. What's the bait?"

"You."

"Oh." Harry groaned. This theory did not sound applicable. Harry was grateful to Patrick for relaying his wisdom, but he sometimes felt like the world's worst student.

Harry decided that some ice cream from the soft serve machine might cheer him up, so he left Patrick at their table and walked across the room for his prize. While in line he felt someone tap him on the shoulder.

"Hello."

He turned around and came face to face with a familiar smile.

"You probably don't remember me, but I'm Mary from the bar. We met a while ago so –"

"No!" Harry assured her. "No, I remember you. It's good to see you again."

His hand extended awkwardly between them as if it had a mind of its own. Thankfully Mary found his gesture charming. She laughed and shook it with a firm grip.

"It's nice to see you again too!"

"I'm glad that your cut is better…" he turned her hand over his palm and saw the faint scar from his broken glass. With his head down he couldn't see her cheeks turn pink.

He released her hand when the person behind them cleared their throat. It seems that their reunion that bottlenecked the ever-important ice cream line.

Harry grabbed a cone and handed it chivalrously to Mary who smiled and proceeded to make the most beautiful ice cream swirl he had ever seen.

"Oh my gosh. That's beautiful!" he said much louder than he realized.

Mary laughed and handed him a cone. "Why don't you give it a try?"

Harry shrugged and attempted a graceful ice cream swirl.

"Not bad…" Mary said. "Any ice cream parlor would be happy to have you."

He sighed and took a lick from his cone. "I wish. I've been trying to find a part time job for the past three weeks. No luck…"

Mary hesitated and pushed her glasses up her nose nervously. "You know, I could get you a job at O'Grady's if you wanted. We need some bus boys and the manager totally trusts me. You could stop by my shift tonight to meet him."

Harry's face lit up. "Seriously? Oh my gosh, this is excellent news. I love you!"

At this point, Patrick was beginning to notice the abnormal amount of time it was taking for Harry to get an ice cream cone. When he glanced over and saw the awkward, but pleased looking couple and he understood the delay. Their body language was clear – Harry was being his normal, unaware (now better dressed) self and this girl was either incredibly shy or attracted to him. It was hard to tell.

"You'll never guess what just happened!" Harry beamed as he took his seat next to Patrick a few minutes later.

'What?"

"I think I finally have a job – and at your favorite bar! How cool is that?"

Patrick thought for a moment and then it dawned on him. "That girl over there, she is a bartender at McGrady's isn't she?"

"Yeah! Her name is Mary and she's super nice!"

Patrick cringed internally. Men should never say the phrase "super nice."

"Congratulations." Patrick said. "That's great."

As Harry happily finished his dessert, Patrick sat back in silence and contemplated the situation. He wanted the best for his friend. Harry was a piece of work, but he was a good guy that cleaned up very nicely. The last thing he wanted was for him to settle for the first girl he tripped over. No, that wouldn't do at all. Patrick Woodhouse wanted to broaden Harry's horizons and he would not rest until he succeeded.

* * *

"I'll have a bacon cheeseburger with everything on it, a side of onion rings, and a coke. Oh – and can I have extra pickles?"

Patrick Woodhouse loved to watch servers' reactions when Zoe ordered food – especially when they were female. Usually eating out with girls meant the same paranoid habits: water or diet coke as the staple beverage choice along with some sort of salad for the main course. If the girl was really pathetic it would be a side salad. Girls never finished the food on their plate and if faced with a communal object like chips or bread, they never under any circumstances would touch the last piece. Patrick had been on enough dates to notice this. He had also been to enough dinners with Zoe to counter balance the stereotype.

Patrick and Zoe always had dinner on Sundays. Sometimes they would stay in and cook and other times, like in this instance, they would go out. It wasn't a scheduled activity and neither outwardly acknowledged the routine; they just seemed to gravitate habitually toward each other during this particular time slot.

"Are you sure that's all?" Patrick asked, smiling and looking at the slightly uncomfortable waitress serving them.

"I'm sure…" Zoe was unaware that Patrick took so much amusement in her eating habits.

"I'll have what she's having – minus the pickles." Patrick told the waitress.

While they waited for their food, Zoe filled Patrick in on her week. She updated him on her student teaching and lacrosse practice. You might suspect Patrick Woodhouse to be the type that doesn't listen very well. Most self-absorbed people are poor at this activity. Patrick was an exception to this rule. Though he sometimes looked distracted, Zoe continued on with full confidence that he was taking it all in.

"Do you think the team has forgiven Jenna Elton for her antics?" he asked her when she finished.

Zoe scrunched up her face. "I am so over that girl."

"I was never in to that girl." Patrick countered.

"Yes, I've noticed your preference lies with another."

Patrick's eyes narrowed. "If you're referring to who I think you're referring to, then all I can say is that I swore Taylor it would never happen. Period."

Zoe didn't look convinced, but Patrick didn't feel like arguing.

"She's a very determined girl. I bet she's used to getting she wants…"

"What's that supposed to mean?" Patrick asked suspiciously.

Zoe shrugged. "I didn't say anything. Unlike some people, I don't like to butt into personal matters."

"Meaning…?"

"Coached any single, socially challenged physics majors lately?"

Patrick frowned and wondered if it was even possible to keep a secret from Zoe Knightley. "Look," he explained. "I'm contributing my services to better mankind. Besides, Harry is making progress. He was flirting with a girl in the dining hall the other day."

"Really? How exciting! Who was it?"

Patrick shrugged. "Some bartender from O'Grady's."

"Aw! Mary? I love that girl. She's so sweet."

"I don't know…" Patrick said skeptically. "She doesn't seem right for him."

Zoe's smile melted off her face quickly. "What, was she not hot enough for your standards, Pat? How would you know if she's not right for him? You thought Jenna Elton would be good option just a few weeks ago! Let's face it, your romantic judgment is questionable."

"Hey! I brought together Maggie and Taylor. Don't forget that big win."

Zoe laughed. "You talk about love like it's a soccer game, Pat. Why don't you just leave it alone and let Harry decide what girl is right for him?"

_What an innovative idea._


	12. Chapter 12 : The Handyman

**Chapter 12: The Handyman**

Patrick Woodhouse knew Zoe Knightley in and out. He knew her favorite color (teal) and her favorite snack (dried cranberries). He even knew her preferred tampon brand and her dress size (neither of these frightened him, by the way). Yes, Patrick Woodhouse _knew_ Zoe very well, but he didn't _see _her very well. To him, she has always been that odd, spunky girl he met in his dorm on move-in day, laying on her common room couch with a blue face mask and lacrosse stick. To the world, she was a triple threat: pretty, kind, and talented. Though not conventionally beautiful, her red hair, lightly freckled skin and distinct features made her different in a flattering way. She treated everyone with respect, which also made her stand out amongst her more caddy female peers. Her athletic ability and smarts didn't hurt her either and though several men had tried, she was perfectly content living the single life in college. Unfortunately, Patrick often forgot to put his friend in perspective.

"I'm going to Zoe's for a sec." Patrick announced to his apartment on his way out. He needed to stop by and return some things she had left at their apartment. Every few weeks Patrick collected the random bits of make-up, clothing, and personal items that were littered around and returned them to their rightful owner.

"Wait!" Taylor said, jumping up form the couch. "I'm bored. I want to come."

Patrick shrugged. "OK"

They walked three blocks west to the house she lived in with several of her lacrosse teammates. It was a nice place and Patrick usually ran into at least one girl in her underwear or in a towel when he came by. At first it made him very excited, but after about one hundred visits, he became desensitized to the whole thing.

When they knocked on the door an unfortunate site appeared before them.

"Oh." Jenna Elton scowled when she saw Patrick. She opened the door reluctantly and let the boys in. "Zoe's somewhere around here." She said dismissively, walking away in a huff.

"Gee, thanks." Taylor mumbled.

"Zoe!" Patrick called out. The two began circulating around the ground floor of the house. "Zoe! Come out and get your stuff so I can go home!"

They entered the kitchen and only saw a man laying half hidden under the sink cabinet. The sound of clinking pipes led them to believe that he was fixing the girls' perpetually broken garbage disposal.

"Hello?" Patrick asked him. "Have you seen a feisty, bossy red head anywhere around here?"

When Jake Dias unexpectedly appeared from under the sink, Patrick had to remind himself to keep a pleasant facial expression.

"Jake!" he said. "_What are you doing here_…?"

"Zoe asked me to come by and fix some things. She's upstairs, but she'll be down soon."

"Zoe asked you to come by and fix things?" Taylor asked, subtly elbowing his friend. Patrick rolled his eyes.

"Yup, that's right."

"Interesting."

"Whatever." Patrick grumbled.

"Hey boys!" Zoe strode into the room. "is that my stuff? Thank God!"

Patrick smiled and offered her the box sweetly as if to prove that he too could be chivalrous. "I just thought I would come by and give you all your things."

"Uh, thanks." She said to his odd behavior. He glanced over that the sink. "Hey Jake – I heard the disposal running from upstairs. It seems to be working!"

"What are you guys up to today?" Patrick interjected.

"Zoe and I were going to play some basketball out front after this." Jake answered. "She promised to whip me back in shape."

"Great!" Patrick said impulsively. "I love basketful."

Taylor was fairly certain that Patrick had never played basketball, but he kept that to himself.

Unfortunately, Patrick had not anticipated this physical activity so he was dressed in jeans and a button-down shirt. In an attempt to seem manly he took it off and threw it aside before playing. Zoe groaned when it landed on her head.

"Smooth, Woodhouse." She said, folding it up and placing it on the ground.

Jake took off his shirt too and Patrick tried not to notice that guy had about twenty more pounds of muscle than he did.

"You in, Taylor?" Jake asked, tossing the ball to him.

Taylor barely caught it and chuckled. "I don't think so."

"Oh come on!" said Zoe. "We need an even number."

"Why don't Jake and I play one and one first?" Patrick said smiling. "Sound good Dias? You ready?"

"Sure." His opponent answered casually.

Patrick's confidence ended after the first check. A few points after starting, he was beginning to regret playing at all.

"Go Jake!" Zoe cried.

Patrick glared at her.

"Aaaaand Patrick!" she corrected, clapping her hands.

"What's going on?"

Vanessa had been walking by and stopped to observe the traditional display of the male ego. Unfortunately, just as Patrick turned his head to the sound of her voice, Jake's pass hit him in the side of the face.

Things went a little fizzy for a moment and Patrick stumbled. Luckily Taylor caught him before he could fall. He couldn't hear or see well for a few seconds, but Patrick could faintly register Jake apologizing over and over again.

"Oh my gosh!" Vanessa cried, rushing forward and cradling Patrick's head. "Are you ok?"

He blinked a few times and stared up into her big dark eyes. "Yeah….I'm good." He tried to say casually. He didn't care much for his assaulter, but the female sympathy wasn't so bad.

Zoe bent down over him and assessed the damage. "Walk it off, soldier."

She gave him a hand up and everyone agreed it might be best to move on to another activity.

"Look on the bright side, Patrick." Taylor said. "I think you're gonna get a pretty sweet black eye out of this."

Patrick felt like dying. The last thing he wanted to sport on his face was evidence of Jake Dias' strength.

Before leaving the house, Patrick managed to pull Zoe into a private room. Zoe deduced his mood by the scowl underneath the icepack strapped to his face.

"What's wrong, Pat? I know something's bothering you and it's not the black eye."

"You're right! It's you!" he said.

_"Me?"_

"Yes, you! You asked Jake Dias to fix stuff around the house. I could totally do that! I used to do that!"

Zoe sighed. "Patrick, I recall making very long to-do lists for you and never having them accomplished. Besides, we're paying Jake. I heard he was looking for some work."

"I could do it for free!"

"We don't mind paying for consistency." Zoe countered. "I was just trying to help him out."

_"You sure about that?_"

Zoe paused and raised her eyebrow. "What are you implying?"

Patrick gulped and wondered whether mentioning this would be a bad idea. "Taylor and Maggie have noticed your sudden interest in Jake Dias."

Zoe looked like she was trying to keep a straight face. "Um, this must be extremely sudden considering I don't even know about it yet."

"Oh."

Patrick's face felt very hot, which was interesting considering it was covered in ice.

"So that's why you're mad?" Zoe asked. "Because you assumed that me asking Jake Dias to fix my sink meant I loved him?"

"I – I'm not mad." He corrected.

"Ok…"

"I just wanted to prove Taylor and Maggie wrong."

"Ok…"

The two stood in silence for a bit. Zoe let the awkwardness flow because she knew that it was making him squirm. He needed a sufficient punishment for his actions anyway.

"You know, Jake Dias is a good guy." She finally said after a while.

"I know." Patrick said regretfully.

"He doesn't have many friends here besides Ben. Maybe you could hang out with him sometime?" she suggested.

Patrick looked appalled, as though his friend was suggesting he improvise brain surgery or birth a child. "W-Why?"

She looked him square in the eye. "Because even though you hide it well, you are a good guy too. Just think about it, ok?

"Ok." He said seriously.

Zoe smiled in satisfaction. "There's a party here tonight, you know."

"You know me. I love a good party." Patrick winked.

"Yeah, this should be interesting." Zoe joked. "I don't know if I like the combination of hard liquor and Jenna's new boyfriend." She made a face.

"Is he a dud?"

"More like a douche bag, actually." She corrected.

Well," Patrick draped his arm around his friend and escorted her back to the hallway. "It looks like I will have to bring reinforcements."


	13. Chapter 13 : The Sleepover

**Chapter 13: The Sleepove****r**

"Are you sure you're going to skip tonight? Zoe said it would be fun!"

Patrick Woodhouse was lying on Taylor's bed at the apartment, tossing a bouncy ball in the air. The trick was to get it as close to the ceiling as possible without hitting it. Years of boredom had cultivated great skill in this area. Taylor was standing in front of his mirror, trying to fix his tie.

"It's my three year anniversary! " he said. "You and Harry will just have to have fun without me."

"How unfortunate." He said. "Are you taking Maggie somewhere expensive and romantic?"

"I am, actually." Said Taylor.

"You are so whipped…"

"Just you wait, Patrick. One day some girl is going to get you on a leash and when that happens I will be the first person to point and laugh."

Patrick smiled and sat up. "So you never miss it, then?"

"What?"

"Being single! Wearing the same shirt two days in a row, flirting with any girl you want, not have to call someone every night…"

Taylor hesitated but then said confidently, "No."

"No?"

"No."

That was interesting. Patrick had always harbored this secret idea that he was luckier than Taylor – that maybe Taylor even lived vicariously through him. Patrick was completely free and always took comfort in the fact that he wasn't one of those tied-down guys holding someone's bag or buying someone flowers. The fact that these tied-down guys were actually happy was oddly unsettling.

"You know, Patrick I think you'll understand someday."

Patrick eventually got up and trudged back to his room. Before leaving, however, he could have sworn he saw something on Taylor's nightstand – something very surprising.

* * *

"Hey babe! Grab me a beer, will you?"

Patrick Woodhouse sincerely hoped that his disgust was not visible. Upon arriving at the small gathering that night and meeting the new faces in the room, he was unfortunately acquainted with Graham, Jenna's new boyfriend from Boston. Zoe's dislike for him was not uncalled for. It usually took a lot for Zoe to dislike anybody. She had not exaggerated at all. Graham was a conceited, oblivious human being. From his frat boy side part to his leather shoes he was dripping with elitism and everyone knew it but him.

"Babe!" Graham called out again. "Did you hear me?"

Jenna pranced over to her boyfriend on the couch and diligently handed him a bottle. Patrick made a mental note never, under any circumstance, to call a female "babe."

He and Harry were seated opposite of Jenna and Graham, a position that Patrick now regretted. He could also sense Harry's discomfort. With each display of affection and crude joke (courtesy of Graham's fifth grade sense of humor) Harry cleared his throat.

Zoe was circulating around the room, talking to everyone and having a nice time. Perhaps she was doing this to avoid Jenna's significant other. _Genius_, thought Patrick.

Jenna was now nibbling on Graham's ear. Harry had a coughing spasm.

"Hey Woodhouse!" Graham said. This was surprising on many levels. First, that he felt it was appropriate to engage in conversations while his girlfriend was so – busy – and second, that he felt comfortable enough to call him "Woodhouse."

"Yeah?" Patrick asked.

"Jenna told me you're a runner. We should hit the trails sometime. I used to do cross country in my prep school days."

Patrick snorted into his solo cup. "_Oh really_?"

"You bet."

"Did Jenna tell you anything else about me?" Patrick asked with a wide smile. Jenna surfaced and narrowed her eyes at him.

"No, no really…"

"Anything about my good friend, Harry here?" Patrick asked, slapping his friend on the back. Harry coughed and sat up straighter.

"Just that he was prone to sickness." Jenna said curtly.

Patrick blinked. Did she seriously just say that?

"Ohhhhh" Graham said, turning to Jenna. "Is this the friend you were telling me about? The one who threw up on a big date? Or was that someone else? Damn, that's got to be rough. "

Harry was staring at his shoes now, undoubtedly trying to be invisible.

"So what's the word, Harry?" Graham asked. "You landed one yet or is the gag reflex in the way?"

_"I certainly hope he's not taken."_

The four of them switched their attention to Zoe Knightley who had just swooped on the painful conversation like a superhero. She towered above her sitting guests nursing a wine glass in her hand like the calm and classy hostess she was.

"What do you mean?" Jenna asked her curiously.

"Oh, well I was just hoping that Harry would be my escort for my sister's wedding." She said, smiling sweetly at her teammate. "It would have been so complicated having to ask permission if he was dating someone, wouldn't it?" Without breaking eye contact with Jenna she took another sip of wine and blinked slowly. Patrick was amazed by this display of female dominance and passive aggressiveness. It was like watching cougars circling each other on the Discovery Channel.

Harry's relieved facial expression was priceless. "I would love to go to your sibling's wedding. That would be amazing!"

Zoe walked over and hugged Harry. "I'm so glad." She said sincerely.

Jenna opened her mouth like she was about to say something, but then stopped. Here was Zoe Knightley, her captain and superior, proudly asking a now very attractive man that she had tossed aside to be her formal date. She didn't know what to make of it at all.

"Zoe," Patrick said, his eyes sparkling. "Can I help you with anything at the bar or in the kitchen?"

She tilted her head and smiled at his hint. "Sure, Pat. That would be great."

All three sane individuals then left the vicinity. Harry went over to talk to a classmate of his and Patrick and Zoe went to her kitchen, leaving Jenna and Graham quite alone – just the way everyone preferred it.

Once in the kitchen Patrick grabbed Zoe and spun her around. "When I grow up I want to be just like you!" he cried.

She laughed hard at his childish, but welcome gesture. "Whatever! I was going to ask him anyway. I just thought the timing was convenient."

"Such poise! Such grace! Such ruthlessness!" he knelt down and kissed her hand. "This calls for a shot!"

"No, Patrick!" she cried, still laughing. "You know what happens when I drink tequila!"

"Let's make it vodka, then!" he said, winking. "And we'll pace ourselves. I promise!" They toasted their glasses together and downed the clear liquid. Zoe squirmed.

This would be the beginning of a very long night.

* * *

Patrick had witnessed a drunken Zoe exactly twice before this night. The first was freshmen year when they were both young and naïve. The second was her twenty-first birthday the year before. This time, however, brought her to an entirely new level.

"Oh my gosh, Patrick!" she cried with astonishment. "I can't believe the bottle is empty. Where did you put it all?"

This was probably the third time Zoe had commented on the empty bottle in the past half hour. She was now holding it up in front of her face and looking at Patrick through the glass. Zoe was sitting on the counter, hair a bit wild and feet swaying back and forth. Patrick felt slightly guilty about her current state. Maybe he shouldn't have pushed those shots on her earlier. Then again, she hadn't resisted. Like most endeavors Zoe Knightley took on, she had given the evening 110% of her effort. Patrick noticed she adopted the same attitude in both the classroom and on the field. It was no surprise at all that she matched him shot for shot and was now showing the full effects of it.

Too bad Harry had left a few hours ago, adhering to a more appropriate bedtime than his two friends. He might have been amused by the spectacle.

"Your strap is off your shoulder, Zoe." Patrick said, stepping forward to adjust her dress and preserve the modesty he knew sober Zoe would subscribe to.

"Thanks!" she said, placing the bottle down. "You're such a good friend."

"You should tell me more often!"

"But that's bad for you!" she said with wide eyes. "You get enough flattery. It's my job to retain the natural balance of the universe."

"That sounds like a tough job…" Patrick said.

"You have no idea…."

Zoe yawned and swayed on the spot. Patrick grabbed her shoulders and steadied her.

'Pat, I'm sleepy." Zoe said, nodding off. She slumped over and Patrick was alert enough to catch her. Due to his gender and weight, Patrick was far less drunk than his friend. The least he could do at this point was to get her safely in bed.

"Come on, Knightley." He said, picking her up. Zoe instinctively locked her arms around his neck. "I'm taking you upstairs."

"Ok…" she said, her head resting comfortably against his shoulder.

He set her down at her door upstairs. She was about to open it, when Patrick suddenly stopped her.

"Hold it!" he cried.

"What's gives?" she whined back.

Patrick pointed to a sock on her doorknob. The two were silent for a moment and heard some suspicious sounds coming from the other side of the wall.

"Oh sweet Jesus, you've got to be kidding me!" Zoe banged her head against the wall.

Patrick quickly stopped her. "It's cool, it's cool." He assured her. "Can you sleep on the couch downstairs?"

"I'm pretty sure it's occupied…" she said sadly. "Patrick, my roommate has sexiled me and now I'm homeless. What do I do?" She then proceeded made the most pathetic puppy face he had ever seen.

Patrick Woodhouse did what any good friend and gentleman would do.

Ten minutes later the two were standing in Patrick's bedroom.

"Is this where I'm sleeping?" she asked groggily.

"Yup!" Patrick said, silently thanking his lucky stars that his sheets were clean.

She grabbed hold of him and gave him a giant hug. "Thank you!"

He patted her head. "Anytime, Knightley. I'm going to step outside while you change, ok?"

"Sounds like a plan!"

He tossed her an oversized tee shirt and left the room for a few minutes. He decided to bring Zoe a glass of water. When he returned, however, she was already curled up under the covers. He set the glass down on the nightstand and tried to exit quietly.

"Pat…" he heard her moan.

"Yeah?"

"Are you sleeping on the couch?" she asked, her eyes still closed.

"Yeah."

"Whatever, just sleep next to me." She said. "I don't have cooties."

He snickered. "I'm not so sure!"

"Heeeey!"

"I'm good on the couch." He assured her.

She moaned again. "No…" she said. "I don't want to be alone in your room at night. Please…." There was something so girlish about her when her inhibitions were down. It was rather endearing.

Patrick folded under her persuasion. "Ok…it it's fine with you…"

Zoe rolled over and made room for him and Patrick climbed in. The bed was already warm.

She was curled up facing outward and Patrick was lying on his back, staring at the ceiling. Something was on his mind.

"Hey, Zoe?" he asked.

"Hmmmm…" she made a noise, but he wasn't sure whether it was a real response.

"Something has really been bothering me and I need to tell someone. Seeing as you probably won't remember it, could I confide in you?" He asked.

"Hmmmm……"

He paused and then finally got it out. "I think saw an engagement ring in Taylor's room tonight."

He didn't get an answer to this. Then again, he didn't expect to. Either Zoe was shocked or she was asleep.

Patrick rolled over curled a pillow under his head. Now still, he could feel Zoe's steady breathing from the other side of the bed. Is this what Taylor wanted? To go home every night and feel someone breathing next to him? Patrick thought about it as he drifted off to sleep…


	14. Chapter 14 : Platonic is a Funny Word

**Chapter 14: Platonic is a Funny Word**

Sarah Knightley insisted that she was not a Bridezilla. She preferred to call her behavior "high standards" or "good taste." For instance, taking her dress back three times after the final alterations wasn't overboard at all - just a celebration of perfection. One can count the number of saintly individuals capable of tolerating this on one hand. Fortunately for Sarah, her little sister was one of them.

The bride-to-be was sitting in the living room of Zoe's house bright and early, flipping through a fashion magazine and shaking her foot impatiently. By the look of the room, it was obvious that the girls had thrown a party the night before. She had to clear some solo cups and empty bottles before sitting down. She didn't care much about that, but she wanted to make sure that her maid of honor was fully alert and sober for their long day of errands.

The front door slammed. Sarah thought it was rather odd since she had expected her sister to descend the staircase and not come in through the front door.

"Why hello, sunshine." Sarah said merrily.

Zoe turned and cringed. "Hi Sarah."

Sarah looked her sister up and down, noting the wrinkled party dress, high heels in hand, and large tee shirt.

"Walk of shame?" she asked, clearly amused.

"No! Of course not!"

"Sure looks like one!" Sarah grabbed the tee shirt her sister was holding and stared at the logo. It had Patrick's high school name on it.

Her jaw dropped. "Well, well, well…"

"It's not what it looks like." Zoe said quickly. "You know how platonic Pat and I are."

Sarah laughed, but didn't say anything.

"What?" Zoe asked annoyed.

Her sister held her hands up. "I didn't say anything. You're the one who mentioned Patrick."

Zoe scowled and started up the stairs to her room.

"Isn't platonic such a funny word?" Sarah teased up at her

Zoe turned. "Meaning?"

"It's always such a defensive adjective. It's not as if anyone could go up to a stranger and introduce someone as their "platonic acquaintance." People only resort to it when deflecting suspicion. _Platonic_ is therefore suspicious by nature."

"You are such an English major!" Zoe's head was starting to hurt, though this was mostly due to last night's alcohol. "I really don't see your point."

Sarah smiled. "Exactly."

"Exactly what?"

"You're _defensive_!"

"Of course I am!" cried Zoe. "I play defense in lacrosse and I'm good at it! Can we just go run some errands?"

Sarah sighed, picking up on the obvious fact that her sister did not want to talk about anything remotely substantive. "Sure. Go shower first."

Zoe trudged upstairs, still confused by her Sarah's comment. Halfway there she turned around and clarified, "By the way, one of my roommates took over the bedroom last night, so Patrick let me crash at his place. Period. That's it. You know, in case you were wondering."

"Whatever you say, little sister…"

* * *

Patrick had slept very well the night before and was ready to tackle a new day. First he needed to clarify a few things to set his mind at ease. The primary object on his agenda was to confront Taylor about his secret. The second was to find out if Zoe was alive. He slept through her morning exit, but he remembered that she stayed the night. In fact, his pillow now smelled like her shampoo. To accomplish his first priority, Patrick invited Taylor to Sunday brunch at O'Grady with Kyle. Harry also happened to be working that shift.

"It's painful to watch." Kyle said through a fake smile.

"Just roll with it." Patrick said, waving at Harry from across the restaurant.

It was Harry's first weekend at O'Grady's. He was attempting to balance several plates of food while waving back at Patrick and his brother. It was not a pretty site.

"Five bucks says the poor guy gets my order wrong." Kyle said. "Pity too – I was looking forward to eating a cheeseburger. Sarah always makes vegetarian dishes at home."

"Well, give him a good tip anyway. He needs the encouragement." Patrick said.

Out of the corner of his eye, Patrick saw Mary rush over to help Harry. She smiled sweetly and took some of the plates from his hand. Every few minutes it seemed like she swooped in to prevent disaster.

"So," Patrick started, turning back to his brother and friend. "you're not getting cold feet, are you Kyle?"

"Hell no!" he cried. "Look, I might hate this wedding planning stuff, but I am so ready to marry Sarah."

"Some might say you're at the ideal age for marriage." Patrick said strategically. "Do you think anything below twenty-five is too young?"

Kyle shrugged. "Everyone is different. I would consider it young, but it depends on the couple."

Patrick shot a sideways glance at Taylor. He seemed unfazed by their topic of conversation. In fact, he was folding up a paper football with his napkin.

"Do you have an opinion?" Patrick asked pointedly.

Taylor shook his head. "Not really. Should I?"

Patrick marinated in his frustration for the next few minutes. He was determined to crack Taylor if it was the last thing he did. That little black box had a big meaning and if Taylor wasn't going to tell him, Patrick was going to force it out of him. Two cokes and one mistaken order later, Kyle left the table to call Sarah and Patrick was left to confront his friend.

"Fess up, Taylor." He hissed. "I saw the box on your bed stand last night. I can't believe you didn't tell me!"

Taylor's eyes widened. "I didn't know I had to…."

"I'm your best friend, right?" Patrick asked desperately. "I feel like you usually tell your best friend huge pieces of news like this, especially when it involves such a huge purchase."

"It wasn't a problem. I've been saving, so…"

"Hey guys!" Kyle sat back down. "I left a voicemail for Sarah. What's up?"

"I think Taylor has some news for us." Patrick said with his arms crossed.

It was hard to tell what Taylor was thinking. The expression on his face was somewhere between confusion and defensiveness. "I got a job interview."

Patrick's face fell.

"Congrats, man!" Kyle said, patting his back.

"Wait – _what_?" Patrick said.

"That's why I bought the cufflinks you saw." Taylor said.

"Cufflinks? _There were cufflinks in that tiny box?_"

Kyle proceeded to share interview day advice with Taylor while Patrick sat back in shock. He had not been expecting this at all. He had gotten so worked up over what turned out to be nothing. Then again, why should he be mad about Taylor marrying Maggie? After all, he set them up three years ago. They were great together. Patrick felt his stomach sink as the ugly, unexpected truth sunk in; he and his friends and actually reached adulthood. He'd been warned about this post-graduation phase of life; all of his friends would start moving in and getting engaged. It was actually happening and he didn't feel the least bit ready for it. Suddenly Kyle and Sarah started to look less like people and more like giant dominos setting off an undesirable chain of events in his life.

"Hello boys!"

Patrick jumped in his seat and out of his panicked thoughts. Sarah and Zoe, each with an armful of bags sat down at the table with them.

"Sorry I didn't answer the phone, sweetie." Sarah leaned over the table and gave Kyle a cute peck on the lips. "I was trying on some things."

Patrick smiled across the table at Zoe. She still looked a bit disheveled. "Good to see you're alive."

"As usual." She said, grabbing his water and taking a gulp.

"We were so busy this morning, but we accomplished a lot." said Sarah. "Just one more week, you know. Do you guys have your tuxes yet?"

"I'm picking them up on Tuesday afternoon." Patrick said.

"Good." Said Sarah, but with a warning look. "Everything needs to go according to schedule!"

Zoe raised her eyebrows at Patrick and they shared a secret smile.

"So, Zoe's plus one is Harry. Patrick, who are you taking?"

"Uh…."

In the business of life, Patrick had completely forgotten to find a date. He wasn't particularly worried. He'd never had trouble finding one before, but judging by the look on Sarah's face his procrastination was simply unacceptable.

"I can't believe this!" she cried, turning to Kyle. "Do you have someone he can go with?"

"Hey now! I can find someone for myself. Plus, if I went stag would it be the worst thing in the world?"

"Yes!" she said, probably louder than she intended. Taylor, the only one uninvolved with the current crisis was staring at the wall awkwardly, trying to avoid Sarah's wrath. "We have a head table for the reception that HAS to be symmetrical and as the BEST MAN you need to have another guest on your left."

"Ok, ok! I'll find someone." Patrick assured her.

"Who would go with you at this late notice?"

"I'm sure Vanessa would love to come along." Taylor intervened for peace. "Everyone else has an invite."

Patrick smiled. "Works for me."

Sarah took a deep breath and sat back in her seat now content with the world. Kyle draped his arm over his fiancé. Patrick then promised himself that he would never marry someone so high maintenance.

* * *

"Hey Patrick?"

"What?"

Taylor and Patrick were lounging around on their couch later that afternoon, half conscious and half watching television.

"Why did you freak out about the cufflinks earlier?" he asked curiously.

Patrick cringed silently, but decided to tell the truth. "I guess it's because I didn't think they were cufflinks…"

Taylor's eyes widened as he started to understand Patrick's meaning. "Oh my god!"

"I know."

"Oh my god, seriously?" Taylor cried again. "That hasn't even crossed my mind. I mean, I don't even have a job yet. I have no idea where I'll be next year! I am so NOT thinking about that now."

"I can't tell you how relieved I am to hear you say that!" Patrick said. "I'm ready to see my older brother yet married, but I'm not sure if I'm ready to see my best friends get married. I guess it's my commitment phobia talking."

Taylor sat up and stared at his friend. "Commitment phobia? Really?"

"Duh." Patrick said. "Haven't you noticed that I don't really commit to women?"

"Well, yeah but it's not like you play them either. I always thought you were just picky."

He shrugged. "I guess I am. "

"Technically, you are the most committed person I know." Taylor pointed out.

Patrick raised his eyebrows. "How many people do you know again?"

"I'm serious!" Taylor started to list his arguments. "You've known that you've wanted to do since you were little. You're independent. Once you make a friend you tend to keep them for life. Also, you call your mother almost everyday."

"Dude! Don't spread that around please." Patrick said. "_She worries_."

"Whatever." He waved it off. "All I'm saying is, you say you fear commitment, but your actions prove otherwise. Who knows, maybe you'll be the first of us to get married."

Patrick threw a pillow at him. "You're insane.

Taylor laughed. "Maybe I am. I did say you could take Vanessa to the wedding."

"You did!" Patrick said.

"And I better not regret that decision, Woodhouse…"

"You have my word. I will not elope with or seduce your cousin this weekend. Scout's honor."


	15. Chapter 15 : The Wedding part I

**Chapter 15: The Wedding (part I)**

Though the Woodhouse and Knightley clans were very different, they were also complementary. Mrs. Woodhouse - a somewhat clingy single mother of two boys - was comforted by the large, loud group of Knightleys. There were seven children in Zoe and Sarah's family: six girls ranging from the ages of twenty-five to seven and one eleven-year-old boy stuck in the middle. While Mrs. Woodhouse operated off of logic and structure, the Knightley parents were far more hands off and relaxed (though equally loving). Any family that could produce such different children as Zoe and Sarah, couldn't be any other way. Patrick's grandmother noticed the Knightley's brand of loving chaos early in wedding weekend.

"There are children running around everywhere! I feel like I might step on one!" Gram shook her cane, and stared at the Knightley children. The boy, Daniel, was chasing a few of his sisters. "You were never like that when you were younger, Patrick."

Patrick smiled. "Well, not in front of you, Gram."

The families were at a nice Italian restaurant downtown, enjoying the rehearsal dinner before the busy wedding day. Sarah was relatively calm, though Patrick suspected that would change quickly.

"Gram," Patrick said, ushering Vanessa over to her seat at the table. "Have I introduced you to my date yet? This is Vanessa. She's Taylor's cousin and a _model_."

"Hello!" the pretty girl said brightly.

Gram looked her up and down and abruptly handed her a roll from the breadbasket. "Here, sweetie. Eat this."

"Um….thanks." she said, half smiling. Patrick tried not to laugh.

"She's always like that." He whispered.

Vanessa nodded understandingly and took her seat. Before Patrick could do the same he felt a small person jump on his back.

"Patrick! Patrick!" a young girl cried behind him. Her hands were clinging around his neck for dear life. "You're here! Zoe said you would be! Did you miss me? Is this where you're sitting? Is this your date? What are you eating tonight?"

"Hello Sophie." Patrick said without even turning around. He grabbed her knees and secured them to his side so she was now in a safe piggyback position. "Long time no see, uh?"

"I know!" the youngest Knightley child cried from his shoulder. "The last time I saw you was when I visited Zoe to watch her game last season."

"Are you going to play lacrosse like your big sister?" he asked.

"Yup!"

"Sophie, get off Patrick's back." Zoe said, coming up to their group. "Mom won't like it." She grabbed her sister and placed her back on the ground. Sophie ran in front of Patrick now. She had a mass of ginger hair and a huge dose of spunk. She reminded Patrick of a mini, energizer Zoe.

"You've grown!" he said, looking shocked. "Soon you'll be taller than me!"

She giggled. "Can I sit with you?"

"Sure thing!" said Patrick, presenting a chair to her.

"Are you Patrick's date?" Sophie asked Vanessa from across the table.

Vanessa beamed. "Why yes I am!"

"You're pretty." said Sophie bluntly. It sounded more like an observation than a compliment. Gram chuckled, then shifted her attention to Zoe.

"Zoe, dear!" cried Gram. "It's good to see you again. Are you excited about tomorrow?"

"I'm nervous for my speech." She confessed. "But yes, I'm very excited."

"Do you have a date?"

"I do, Gram." Zoe said. She pointed across the room to Harry who was getting drinks for them. He was dressed in one of the suits and Patrick and Zoe had picked out for him. Patrick felt proud over his friend's progress.

"Oh! How handsome!" Gram said. "Patrick, why don't you dress that nicely?"

Patrick was about to point out that he too was wearing a nice suit, but decided on to fight the battle. Zoe caught his eye and smiled warmly.

Gram made room for Zoe and Harry to sit next to her. Patrick was highly amused by this. Sometimes he thought that his Gram loved Zoe more than she loved him. Then again, he couldn't really blame her. Zoe was kind of awesome.

Patrick spent most of the night entertaining Sophie and less of it talking to Vanessa like he expected. Vanessa played along with his silliness, but he knew it wasn't really her style. Patrick was slightly disappointed at first. After all, Vanessa looked gorgeous in her little black dress and he was curiously where this weekend of celebration might take their ambiguous relationship. Still, Sophie turned out to be a pleasant interruption. Patrick was sure that as one of seven children she rarely got this much attention.

"Patrick," she whispered after dessert. "Can I tell you a secret?"

He leaned in seriously. "Absolutely."

Her eyes shifted around to make sure no one was listening. "I like you better than Kyle. I wish Sarah would marry you instead."

It took a lot of control for Patrick not to burst our laughing. "Aww." he said. "Kyle is tons of fun, Sophie. Plus, I think Sarah prefers him."

She sighed. "Even if Kyle and Sarah get married, can you still be my brother?"

Patrick was unexpectedly touched by this. "Sure, Sophie."

"Sophie!" Mrs. Knightley called out at that moment. She seemed to be wrangling up all of her children for the night. Sophie turned into a blur of orange as she ran to her mother.

"Sorry she clung to you all night." Zoe apologized later that night. "You're obviously her favorite."

"It was my pleasure." Patrick said sincerely. "She reminds me a bit of you, actually."

She laughed at his observation. "Is it the hair or the sticky fingers?"

Patrick thought for a moment. "I'd say it's the smile."

* * *

_"Where is my bouquet?"_

The beast had been unleashed. Sarah was freaking out. She looked beautiful doing it, though. Her satin dress was lovely, but at present her face was contorted into an unnatural expression of feminine rage.

"Zoe's getting it!" her mother assured her. Patrick's mother was also straightening her veil. There seemed to be several hands on Sarah, actually.

They were moments away from walking down the aisle. In fact, Patrick could hear Canon in D starting to play in the main church. They were all entering in a very orderly fashion – the parents first, followed by the flower girl and ring bearer. The wedding party came out in pairs, the last of which was Zoe and Patrick as the best man and maid of honor. Kyle was already waiting at the altar. Patrick was grateful that he couldn't see the bride's pre-wedding panic.

"I've got it!" Zoe ran awkwardly in heels into the church link with a bouquet of cream and pink flowers. She practically threw it at her sister and took her place next to Patrick in line.

"Nice timing, Knightley." He whispered.

"Thanks."

The procession began and soon Patrick felt Zoe slip her arm in his. Sarah's final pick for her bridesmaids' dresses was very different than the original one he mocked Zoe in. Sarah had found a shade of dark pink that didn't make Zoe's hair look ridiculous. Also, these ones looked more like cocktail dresses and less like Glinda the Good Which costumes.

"You look nice." He commented quickly before they started walking.

Zoe didn't have time to reply before their entrance, but she did blush slightly.

The church was very elegant. There were flowers everywhere and everyone looked so happy. Clearly, Sarah and Zoe had done an excellent job executing the original wedding vision.

When Sarah entered with her father, Patrick glanced at his brother. Patrick had always liked Sarah and Kyle together, but at in the past he'd had doubts about the pair. Watching his brother watch Sarah walk down the aisle erased all of them. He had never seen Kyle happier. As the wedding party turned to face the altar, Patrick glanced over and saw a tear go down Zoe's cheek. Maybe she had seen Kyle's face too.

There had been a lot of talk about marriage over the past week – most of it with a negative or panicky tone. Still, watching a now calm and happy Sarah beam up at his brother made Patrick warm up more to the institution.


	16. Chapter 16 : The Wedding part II

**Chapter 16: The Wedding (part II)**

Patrick Woodhouse was completely terrified of his best man speech. He sat nervously at the head table, Kyle on his right and Vanessa on his left. He tried his best to bury his worries in the back of his mind and enjoy his fillet, but even beef couldn't comfort him now. He only hoped that his inward panic wasn't visible to those around him.

I wonder if Zoe feels this way too, he thought. She had caught him just before the reception and performed a coin toss between the two of them. Patrick had won and requested to go second in the series of speeches. At first he felt good about this decision, but in the middle of the salad course an awful possibility dawned on him: if Zoe did a good job, he would have an _incredibly _hard act to follow.

"Are you ready?" Vanessa leaned in and asked him during dinner. She placed her hand on his arm and he felt a jolt through his body.

He cleared his throat nonchalantly. "Sure, I got this." His words came out like an adolescent crackle.

Zoe started to tap on her champagne glass lightly and the rest of the room followed. Patrick sat up straighter and looked over at his friend.

"Hello." She said, standing up. She seemed confident, but Patrick could tell by the smaller, more familiar aspects of her body language that she was nervous. "For those of you that don't know me, I'm Sarah's little sister Zoe. I just wanted to say a few things about her and this poor shmuck, Kyle."

Everyone chuckled and Patrick could see Sarah blushing from her seat.

"Well, most of you know how different Sarah and I are. She knows more about make-up and romantic novels and unfortunately, I know more about sports and bad movies. We're so different and everyone has commented on it since we were little. They say were opposites. "Night and day," "black and white" – we've heard all the analogies out there over the years. Sarah, I have a confession to make on your wedding day. " Zoe turned to Sarah and placed her hand on her shoulder. "It might not look like it sometimes, but ever since I was little…I really just wanted to be like you. You're amazing and I love you more than words can say. So, while we still share a last name I wanted to tell you how much I've looked up to you…and still do."

Sarah unceremoniously burst into tears. Kyle patted her on the shoulder and beamed at his new sister-in-law.

"And Kyle!" Zoe choked, trying not to get emotional. "You better treat her right, the way we Knightley girls deserve!" The crowd laughed and Zoe raised her glass. "To Sarah and Kyle Woodhouse!"

Everyone drank from their glasses and Zoe passed the microphone to Patrick. He took it with a shaky hand. She gave him a squeeze before letting go completely. He was grateful for that.

He took a deep breath and dove in without looking back.

"I'm not going to pretend to be as eloquent as Zoe here, so I'll keep this short."

Kyle and Sarah looked up at him and smiled. Patrick sighed and continued with more confidence.

"I don't know if many of you know this, but I introduced Kyle and Sarah a few years ago."

There was a loud cough to his right.

"Oh yeah. Zoe was there too." He said quickly. People chuckled.

"Anyway, I've seen Kyle have crushes on girls before…trust me. Sarah was different from the start, though. She fit into his everyday life so seamlessly. She was like this natural addition to his life – to all our lives actually. These two have really taught me a lot about love in that way. I used to think it was a rollercoaster – crazy, passionate and slightly twisted. Kyle and Sarah are crazy for each other, don't get me wrong, but they are also partners. They're a family. So let's raise our glasses to this new family and wish them all the joy they deserve."

From a distance, Patrick saw his mother tearing up. Everyone sipped champagne as Patrick sat down. He winked at Zoe.

Kyle ushered Sarah on to the floor for their first dance. The crowd silently watched as the two shared their special moment. After a few minutes several couples joined them including Harry and Zoe. Patrick was pleasantly surprised by Harry's behavior. He was confident and – dare he say – _suave_.

"Hey you." Vanessa said sweetly. "Wanna dance?"

"Uh…"

Patrick Woodhouse was good at many things and the things he wasn't good at, he tended to avoid.

"The thing is…" he explained. "I'm not the best dancer."

Vanessa smiled. "Well, I'm good enough for the both of us." She grabbed his hand and led him to the floor. She had been right. Vanessa was very graceful and poised. Patrick didn't mind much. It was hard for him to look bad with a girl like Vanessa on his arm.

"Can I cut in?" Gram came out of nowhere. "I'd like to dance with my only single grandchild."

Vanessa obiliged. "I need to step outside and make a call anyway." She squeezed Patrick's shoulder and waltzed away to the veranda.

Gram whistled and took her place. "That girl's got some tricks up her sleeve."

Patrick laughed. "I guess she does."

"Is she your girlfriend?"

"No, not really."

"Good." Gram said abruptly. "I can't imagine you with a girl like that."

"A gorgeous girl, you mean?"

Gram slapped in arm playfully. "Patrick Woodhouse, there are plenty of pretty _and_ substantial girls out there."

Patrick twirled his grandma around. "Does this mean you have to approve my girlfriends?"

Gram smiled slyly. "What do you think?"

Gram started to lead them in one direction across the dance floor. Patrick let her. Long ago he learned to let Gram have her way. Before he knew it they were dancing along side Zoe and Harry.

"Zoe, dear." Gram said to her. "Why don't we switch partners? I'd like to know this Harry a bit better."

"Does that mean I get stuck with Patrick?" she joked.

"Not for too long."

The couples switched. Harry seemed a bit surprised by the change, but rolled with it. Zoe gave Patrick a knowing look then wrapped her hand around his neck. Patrick took her other hand in his and they started to sway back and forth to the music casually.

"Let's hope she doesn't grill him." Zoe said, nodding over to Gram and Harry.

"He can hold his own." Patrick assured her.

"I know. In fact, I have a compliment to pay you." Her eyes twinkled.

Patrick raised his eyebrows. "Indeed? Well, please say it. I'm always up for a compliment."

"I think you saw potential in Harry that no one else did. He is a really great guy and a very polite escort."

Patrick beamed. "I told you, did I?"

Zoe sighed at his arrogance. "You're so predictable. By the way, your speech was lovely."

"Yours too." Patrick, riding off his procured confidence, attempted to dip his friend.

Zoe let out a yelp and grabbed his shoulders to steady herself. "Please try not to kill me."

He turned slightly pink. "Let's just stick to swaying back and forth, uh?"

Zoe seemed pleased with this minimalism. She leaned in a bit closer and hugged him around the middle while they shifted their weight back and forth together slowly. She was just tall enough for Patrick to lean his chin on the top of her head.

"Can I cut in?"

Patrick opened his eyes. Funny, he hadn't even realized he'd closed them. Little Sophie was tugging on his tuxedo pant.

"You have to ask Zoe." Patrick told her.

"Can I?"

Zoe laughed and stepped aside.

"Yay!"

"You seem to be a hot commodity, Patrick Woodhouse." Zoe said.

"Tell me something I don't know."

She rolled her eyes, but couldn't hide her grin.

Patrick hoisted Sophie up on his shoes and let her dance on his feet like a few of the other children were doing.

Sarah interrupted the dancing a few minutes later with a very important announcement.

"Time for the bouquet toss!"

Suddenly, the women were gathering like excited animals all around him. Patrick scurried to the side to avoid the madness.

"Ready?" Sarah called out to the crowd behind her.

She tossed the pink flowers over the head. And they landed in the middle of the crowd. The bouquet danced around on top of the greedy hands. A few of the flowers became casualties of grabbing and pulling. Finally, one hand emerged from the crowd with a firm grip.

"Zoe?"

Zoe Knightley was laughing very hard and looked highly surprised at her luck. Her hairdo had come undone from the ruckus, so strands of red curls were falling in her face. Sarah took Zoe's arm excitedly and raised it in the air with her own as if she had just won a race.

"Ok, boys." Kyle said, steeping forward. "The garter is next. Get prepared."

The single gentlemen gathered civilly around each other. Patrick was standing next to Harry.

"I wonder which poor guy will – AHH!"

The garter came without notice. It hit Patrick in the face and bounced off into Harry's hand.

"I got it! Wow!" Harry cried, holding up his prize.

Patrick rubbed his cheek. "_Seriously, why do things keep hitting me in the face?_" he mumbled under his breath.

The photography grabbed Zoe and Harry for a picture. Zoe took a seat on Harry's lap and posed with the flowers.

"Isn't that just adorable?" Mrs. Woodhouse said, placing her hand on her son's shoulder.

Patrick shrugged. "Whatever."

She straightened his bow tie for him. "I'm glad you didn't catch it. I wouldn't want to loose you too soon after your brother."

"I don't think you have to worry about that, mom." Patrick said. "Judging my the violence that symbolic garter has for me, I doubt marriage will come my way anytime soon."

"Speaking of girls, where is that date of yours?" she asked.

Patrick surveyed the reception hall. With all these distractions he'd almost forgotten about Vanessa. He couldn't find her anywhere. A few minutes later he grabbed his phone and saw a new message waiting for him. It was an apologetic voicemail from Vanessa saying that something suddenly came up and she had to leave early. That was odd, but Patrick brushed it aside and enjoyed the rest of his brother's wedding with family and friends.


	17. Chapter 17 : The Girl of Harry's Dreams

**Chapter 17: The Girl of Harry's Dreams**

The excitement from the wedding weekend had fizzled out successfully. Kyle and Sarah went on their honeymoon as planned while everyone else retreated back to their normal lives. For Zoe, Patrick, Harry, and Vanessa that meant another few weeks of classes and a last round of finals. Patrick caught back up with Vanessa soon after the wedding just to make sure everything was fine.

"I'm good." she promised. They had just gotten out of class together and Patrick was walking her to lunch. "A friend I knew was having some trouble. Sorry to leave to abruptly. Please apologize to your family for me."

"No, it's fine. I just wanted to make sure you were OK." Patrick said.

Vanessa hugged her books to her chest tighter, but presented a somewhat forced smile to her companion. "Everything is great!"

When they exited the building Jake Dias was sitting on a bench outside. He jumped to his feet as soon as he spotted them. It was funny, but it almost looked like Jake had been waiting for them.

"Hi…." he said, looking back and forth between Patrick and Vanessa. There was an awkward silence.

"Hey Jake." Patrick said, trying his best to be friendly. "It's nice to see you on campus like this. Want to join us for lunch?"

"Uh…" he looked back and forth between them again. "I would…I think."

Patrick smiled pleasantly. "Good! Everyone has to eat. That's what I always say."

They started walking toward the dining hall, but Vanessa stayed put.

"You coming with us?" Patrick asked.

Vanessa shook her head. "I should call my agent. I need to return her voicemails. I've been putting it off all week."

"That can't wait until after lunch?" Jake asked with agitation.

"No." she said firmly. "I'll see you later, Patrick."

The two boys watched her rush off. Patrick was highly confused. Jake just seemed angry. Remembering how he promised Zoe to be nicer, Patrick suggested that he and Jake grab a "man lunch." Jake indifferently accepted the invitation. A few minutes later they were seated in front of platefuls of generic college cuisine. Neither spoke at first. Jake shoveled the food in his mouth and stared out the window.

"Something on your mind?" Patrick asked.

Jake shrugged. "I guess."

"Want to talk about it?"

"Not particularly."

Patrick sighed and picked at his chicken sandwich. "I'm a good listener. I swear."

After another moment Jake set his fork down and stared at his confidant sternly. "Have you ever felt backed against the wall? Like, really trapped by the people around you?"

"Uh…" Patrick was having a hard time with this. He thought that eating with the guy was a big step. Now he was required to unfold the complex thoughts simmering in his brain? Really? "I'm not sure if I've ever felt that way."

"Jake stabbed a carrot on his plate with his fork. "It's like I can't breath sometimes. Everything is out of my control – at least it feels that way."

Patrick had no idea what this guy was talking about, but stuff like that never stopped him from putting in his two cents. "Nothing is out of your control, Jake. You seem like a pretty in-control-guy, to be honest. I'm not sure what the particulars of your situation are, but I'm willing to bet that you can take charge."

Jake sat back and thought. "Maybe."

This was by far the most awkward lunch Patrick had ever had. Somehow he got through ten more minutes of counseling Jake's mysterious frustration. Patrick was thankful to use his next class as an excuse to leave. He usually skipped this afternoon class, but Patrick was more than willing to make an exception to escape this social outing.

* * *

Patrick leaned over the bar at O'Grady's later that week. After five days of consistent class attendance and two successful papers, he felt that a beer was well deserved. Luckily for him, Harry's employment meant a twenty percent discount.

"Can I have another?" Patrick asked.

Harry made a perfect pour at the bar and slid the glass gracefully over to Patrick. His food service and bartending skills had improved exponentially over the past few weeks.

"Thanks!" Patrick said gratefully.

"Your're welcome!"

'Great job, Harry." Mary said, passing him quickly on her way to the kitchen. "here are your tips." She tossed him a wad of cash.

"Nice." Harry sad, placing it in his pocket. "I love this job."

"You've really gotten the hang of it." said Patrick. "Not that you weren't great before…"

Harry smirked. "It's OK. You can say it. I sucked when I started. I really owe it all to Mary. She shadowed me way longer than she should have. She taught me everything she knows."

"Cool…" said Patrick, only half listening. "So did you hear back from that consulting firm?" Harry had been applying for various consulting and engineering jobs around the country. Last week he interviewed with a firm in Washington D.C. Patrick was eager to find out Harry's fate, mostly because he desperately wanted a roommate in that area next year. Patrick long-secured job at a policy think tank was a comfort, but also wanted a friend to join him in the city if he could help it.

Harry placed down the bar glasses and smiled. "It just so happens…they offered me a position!"

"YEAH!" Patrick cried, slamming his glass down. "This calls for a celebration. Can I buy you a beer?"

"I'm working!" Harry laughed. 'Rain check?"

"Fine, fine." Said Patrick. "So, we are rooming together, right? That was never a question, was it?"

"Of course we are!" Harry said. "That would be awesome."

Patrick basked in this news. The small worries he had about completely starting over in a new place were washed away. Secretly, he had felt slightly insecure about moving away and leaving everyone he was close to. Taylor was set to stay in school for his masters degree. Maggie was planning to stay with him. Zoe had already accepted a teaching position in her hometown in New Jersey. The fact that Harry was living with Patrick meant a lot.

"I'll start hunting for two bedrooms in the city." he said.

"Sounds great." Harry said.

"You know, you've seemed really on top of things this week." Patrick observed. "Your bartending is great, your job is in place, and you clearly had an awesome time at the wedding."

"Yeah…" Harry said dreamily. "Things are going very well for me."

Patrick raised his eyebrow and leaned in. "Harry," he whispered. "I've seen that look on guys before. That look means that you have lady friend. Now, are you going to tell me who it is or should I scare it out of you?"

"Oh come on!" Harry said, filling more orders as he talked to his friend. "After the Jenna fiasco last semester, I do not trust you with my love life!"

Patrick held up his hands. "Fine! Point well taken. I'll respect your privacy. I won't ask for details."

"I'll only say this." Harry said happily. "She's way better than any Jenna Elton type on this campus."

"Really?"

"Oh yeah."

Patrick wondered who this mystery woman was and why he hadn't noticed her himself.

* * *

Zoe Knightley's bedroom was organized chaos. Nothing really matched, but everything worked together. Her furniture was all second hand and old-fashioned (she was a cheap antique junkie), but with modern accents everywhere. Patrick's favorite part of the room was Zoe's cushy bedspread. The first thing he always did was run in and jump on her bed like a five-year-old. He wasn't sure her roommate approved of this, but lucky for him she wasn't there right now.

"Will you please get off my bed," she cried, throwing a pillow at him. "I'm trying to study here and you're not helping."

"Can't we take a break?" Patrick asked with a puppy face.

Zoe gathered her mass of red hair into a messy updo and shook her head. "I have to nail this stuff tonight. My test is the day is on Thursday and I have my last game tomorrow. I won't have time to study."

"Are you nervous?" he asked.

"Well, I've been taking pretty good notes all semester so –"

"I meant about the game!"

She smiled. "Oh – that. Yeah…" Forgetting her books, she plopped down on the bed next to Patrick. Both were face up now, staring at the ceiling next to each other. "I'm not sure why I'm freaking out. It's just a game."

"Yeah, but it's your last one…"

She sighed. Patrick could hear the discomfort in her breathing.

"We'll all be there to cheer you on!" he promised, trying to make her feel better. "I've gathered the gang together. You'll have a fan club tomorrow."

She smiled. "Just what I need. Thanks, Patrick." She leaned over and kissed him quickly on the cheek.

"Yeah," he continued, feeling very satisfied with himself. "Taylor, Maggie, and Harry are coming. Jake and Ben might be coming too." The last sentence sounded less excited.

"You better be nice to those two, Woodhouse." She warned him.

"I'm always nice!" he joked. "Oh – I almost forgot – Vanessa wants to come too."

He felt Zoe's body stiffen next to his. "Vanessa?" she asked. "I didn't know she like lacrosse….or sports."

Patrick turned his head toward Zoe and examined her face for a minute. A miscevous grin broke out on his face. "Well, well, well…"

"What?" she asked.

"You don't like Vanessa! I'd never noticed before."

Zoe sat up, looking offended. "I never said that!"

"You didn't have to. I can read you like a book."

"She might not be m favorite person," she admitted. "but it's because we're both so different."

"Is it the girl thing? Is it because she's a model? Because you're pretty too."

Zoe blushed. "It has nothing to do with her looks. She's just….she's been acting weird lately. That's all."

"Actually, you're right." Patrick agreed. "She practically ran away from Jake and I the other day."

Zoe paused. "What is going on between those two?"

Patrick sat up and laughed. "What do you mean?"

"Patrick," Zoe said seriously. "Do you really know how well those two know each other?"

"Zoe," he said slowly. "I've spent enough time with Vanessa to know that she isn't in the Jake Dias fan club."

"So is that what you do when you're together? You gossip? She sounds like a great girl."

Patrick was surprised. Zoe didn't usually talk about other girls like that. Something was up with her, but he couldn't tell what. Maybe it was just her pre-game jitters.

"Close your eyes." Zoe said. "I'm changing into my PJ's."

Patrick did as he was told and sat back on his favorite bed again. He heard her rummage around in her closet and close drawers. "Giving up on studying, then?" he asked, his eyes still shut.

"Yup." He heard her say. "I think I've learned all I can about the Korean War."

When Patrick opened his eyes Zoe was pulling her shirt down over her bare stomach. He looked away quickly and coughed.

"I think I'm gonna head out now and let you sleep."

"OK…" she said. "You can hang around for a bit if you want. I was just getting comfortable."

"It's fine. I'll see you tomorrow."

He gathered up his books and walked home. He had a lot on his mind now. Patrick Woodhouse was usually the guy who knew about everything, but for some reason, he felt in the dark about so many things lately. He could barely tell what was going on with half of his friends. He had no idea who Harry liked. He couldn't pin point the reason for Vanessa's moodiness. Even Zoe was acting strange. He wasn't used to this ignorance at all.


	18. Chapter 18 : A Disappointment

**Chapter 18: A Disappointment**

"GO ZOE!" Patrick cried from the stands. "Wooooo yeah!"

Zoe sprinted by the sidelines after another player. Using her stick she swiftly checked the other girl and stole the ball before she knew what hit her.

"NICE!"

"God, she's so good." Vanessa said. She dug into her purse and grabbed a pair of large, black designer sunglasses.

"Z-z-zoe's amazing." Ben Bates stuttered, agreeing wholeheartedly. He threw his fists up awkwardly into the air in a supportive gesture.

Ben, Vanessa, Maggie, and Taylor were all sitting together for the occasion. Even Jake came along, though he seemed just as bothered as he was earlier in the week.

"You-you know, if I played a sport. I w-would play lacrosse." Ben said to Jake. "It's so f-f-fast placed."

Jake nodded. "It's cool that Zoe works so hard to go to school here. Athletic scholarships are hard to come by. It's refreshing to see someone so independent and driven."

"Just because someone isn't on scholarship or saving the world, doesn't mean they aren't a good person." Vanessa retorted randomly.

"But it is admirable." Taylor argued.

"Whatever, Taylor."

Ben chuckled. "I guess we c-can't all be athletes like Z-Zoe, uh?"

No one said anything. Both Vanessa and Jake were too tense to talk. Maggie, Taylor, and Patrick were too absorbed in the game to keep up regular conversation.

The girls lost that day, but they had played a good game. Zoe looked very disappointed when the buzzer sounded. She didn't have much of a reason to be, though. She'd made half of the team's assists. Patrick smugly noted that Jenna only played about five minutes in total.

"It's just too bad." Maggie said, putting her arm in Taylor's. The group was now waiting in the parking lot for Zoe to emerge from the locker room. "It was Zoe's last game."

"At least we were all here." said Taylor.

"Yeah, it's really important to be there for the ones you care about. Right, Vanessa?" Jake asked.

Vanessa shot him an ugly stare. "Sure it is."

"Do you guys want to grab a bite after this?" Patrick asked.

"Sure!" said Maggie. "We can treat Zoe. She'd like that."

"Great. What are you all in the mood for?"

Ben stepped in excitedly. "Well, there a g-great place on – uh – what's the name of that sstreet? It's – uh – in t-that shopping center w-with the – uh… oh you know! It's name is k-k-kind of p-p-p…"

Patrick's head was reeling. "C-C-Come on, man. We don't have all day. Spit it out already."

The words must have sounded far hasher coming out of his mouth than in his head, because as soon as Patrick finished the whole group went silent. Patrick's stomach dropped and a deep, elementary school embarrassment rushed over him.

"S-sorry…" Ben said softly, trying his best to shake the comment off. His best was not good enough.

"Oh! Zoe's here!" Maggie cried when she noticed the addition to their group. It was hard to tell whether Maggie was really that excited to see Zoe or whether he was just desperate to deflect the horrible awkwardness.

Patrick turned around and came face to face with Zoe. He didn't even need to ask; judging by the stony look on her face, Zoe had heard exactly what he had said to Ben. For the first time in his life, all Patrick wanted to do was blend into the background. If only time machines were real. Patrick Woodhouse would have paid anything to acquire one and prevent this situation – anything to erase the sincere look of disappointment that was plastered over his best friend's face.

The group dispersed into various cars to caravan over to a local diner. Vanessa was the only one who rode in Patrick's car. When they parked Patrick noticed that Ben and Jake hadn't come.

"Where's Ben?" he asked Vanessa.

She shrugged. "I guess he and Jake went home."

"Damn it." Patrick muttled under his breath, kicking his tire.

"What's wrong with you?" she asked. "You didn't say anything horrible. I don't know why you're so upset."

"You don't understand how sensitive that guy is." Patrick said, staring at his now sore foot. "Damn it." He repeated.

Vanessa crossed her arms and headed inside after Harry, Maggie, and Taylor. From the corner of his eye Patrick say a familiar green SUV parking near his spot. He heard a car door slam shut angrily. Patrick was experiencing a fight or flight feeling, and went with flight. He started following Vanessa inside quickly, but a small, strong hand grabbed his arm and whirled him around.

"Patrick." Zoe said, stopping him.

"What?" he asked nonchalantly. "What's wrong?" He was desperately trying to avoid her eyes.

"Seriously?" she asked, sounding sad. "You really don't know what I want to talk about?"

"What do you want me to say?" he cried, breaking down. "Do want me to say I'm a jerk? Fine, I'm a jerk."

"That's not what I want." She said. Her face was still flushed from the game. "Why did you say that Patrick? The guy I know would never stoop so low."

"Maybe you don't know me that well, then."

Zoe grabbed Patrick's face and tried to force eye contact. He turned away form her. "You know that's not true." She said.

"We can't all be perfect like you, Zoe." He said.

She laughed. "You think I'm perfect? Begin polite to others doesn't require perfection. It just requires decency. You know, whether you like it or not you're a leader and people follow you. If you treat Ben like that then other people might – "

"Oh come on!" he cried. "Ben's ridiculous sometimes."

"I don't care!" Zoe said. "I just spoke with Ben. You should have heard him. He was going on and on about how annoying you must think he is and how nice it was for you to put up with him day after day."

She ran her hands through her messy hair in frustration. It looked like she was trying to find a way to say something. Patrick didn't take this as a good sign. It took a lot to make Zoe Knightley speechless. "Look, I don't want to lecture you…."

"_Sure you don't._" Patrick muttered.

"…but, Patrick" she continued "sometimes it feels like you don't even care about being the great person I know you are already. It's like you've lowered the bar on yourself or something."

Patrick was silent. He'd expected her to yell at him. That he could take. He though Zoe was going to pound her fists or slap his wrists. This was so much worse than any of that. He finally caved and met her gaze. There was pure disappointment in those pools of blue – so much worse than anger. He felt physically sick.

"Look," Zoe said after a minute of silence. "Let's just go inside and have dinner, OK? I'm tired of fighting with you."

He watched her walk toward the door. He had a bad feeling, however, that this fight had been different than any other – that somehow he wouldn't be able to joke around and call her later the way he used to. It felt like something changed right then and there in the diner parking lot.

Patrick Woodhouse hated change.

* * *

Shame is a strange thing. It is both demobilizing and mobilizing. For instance, in the days immediantly following the 'incident' at the lacrosse game, Patrick's shame was so strong that he was tripping over himself to make it up to Ben. He visited regularly, bringing beer, pizza, and a good attitude each time. On the other hand, his shame also paralyzed him when it came to Zoe. So many times he started to dial her number or walk toward her apartment to talk, but each time he stopped half-way through. It had been three days since he last spoke to her. That was the longest dry spell in the history of their friendship.

"You look down." Harry observed later that weekend while they were hanging out in their apartment. "Are finals tough?"

Patrick shook his head. He went through his tests indifferently that week. None of them had been too hard so far. He'd been distracted by other things - mostly personal.

"OK…" Harry said at his silence. "Well, at least things with you and Ben are cool now."

"Yeah." Patrick said dryly. "We're speaking at least. I don't know if I would do the same if the roles were reversed."

Harry smiled and gave him a light punch on the arm. "Who could stay mad at you? Come on."

Patrick felt lucky to have a friend like Harry now. Harry's optimistic outlook was really helpful in situations like this.

"I know this is a weird time, but I could actually use some advice." Harry said.

Patrick sighed with relief and sat up straighter on the cough. This is just what he needed – a distraction. Helping Harry always made him feel better.

"Shoot." Said Patrick.

"Great!" Harry said, taking a seat. "So, you know the girl I mentioned earlier?"

"Yeah!"

"So, I've been taking it slow and spending some time with her. I wanted to make sure she felt the same way about me before I made an official move."

Patricked nodded. "Very smart. Sounds good so far."

"Anyway, I could really use your help brainstorming what to do or how to tell her."

"That all depends on the girl." Patrick was mentally unlocking his extensive amount of dating knowledge. "You could get flowers. That never goes wrong. Maybe you could set up a scavenger hunt – OH! You could cook dinner. Well, you could order dinner and put it on plates…."

"That's the thing." Harry said. "She doesn't really seem the type to like the usual fare. She's very down to earth. You know – low maintenance, but sincere."

"Really?" Patricked asked, sounding intrigued. "That's a tough one."

Harry laughed. "See, that's why I asked you. You know her better than anyone. So…how should I get stuff started with Zoe?"

"Zoe who?"

"Zoe Knightley – who else?"

Patrick's face fell.

"Patrick? Patrick?" Harry asked curiously.

"W-What?"

"Nothing," said Harry, eyeing him oddly. "You were just quiet for a minute."

"Oh."

"So what should I do?" he asked again.

"With what?"

"With Zoe!" Harry said.

"Right." Patrick felt slightly dizzy. Maybe it was the breakfast burrito he had earlier that day. "Sorry, I don't feel great."

"Well, do you have any words of wisdom?"

Patrick blinked and attempted to process the situation at hand. He wasn't sure how to proceed.

"And you're sure she likes you back? I mean, you're positive?" he asked curiously.

Harry nodded confidently. "Definitely. It all started before the wedding. I don't know, she'd just always been so flirty and nice. I feel like she treats me differently. I mean, I was really surprised when she asked me to the wedding. I thought she was just being nice, but since then she has just shown interest. Am I crazy?"

It was like Patrick was seeing his friend for the first time. He'd always pictured Harry as this plaid-wearing nice guy. Even after he and Zoe dressed him up, Harry still seemed the same. Now, in this light, Patrick could only see a smooth, confident Casanova. He suddenly looked just like the theoretical 'nice guy' that Zoe always talked about. Patrick suddenly remembered the image of them dancing, of Zoe sitting on Harry's lap with a bouquet of roses, and them laughing over the counter at O'Grady's.

"Oh my god." Patrick said without realizing it.

Harry's smile faded. "You must think I'm really stupid, uh? God, if Jenna is too good for me then Zoe's probably way out of my league."

"No – that's not what I meant." Patrick corrected him. "It's just… are you sure she likes you?"

"Is that so hard to believe?"

Patrick didn't answer fast enough. Harry got up and shook his head.

"Thanks for the advice, Pat." He said sarcastically, striding to his bedroom door and slamming it shut.

Patrick put his face in his hands. Just when he thought he couldn't make one more person made at him, he achieved the impossible.


	19. Chapter 19 : Déjà vu

**Chapter 19: Déjà vu**

_Patrick was in Zoe's bedroom again. Everything was where it usually was – the photo of her family, her secret stuffed animal, and the piles of knickknacks. He was even in his usual spot on the down comforter._

_"Will you please get off my bed?" she cried, throwing a pillow at him. "I'm trying to study here and you're not helping."_

_"Can't we take a break?" Patrick asked with a puppy face._

_She smirked. "You're impossible."_

_Instead of climbing on her bed she took a running start and jumped on the mattress with her full weight. Patrick laughed as he bounced lightly in the air. Zoe nestled next to him. They were both on their backs facing her ceiling._

_"Are you nervous for tomorrow?"_

_"Yeah." Zoe said. "It's my last game."_

_"Well," Patrick said. "Lucky for you, I organized a Zoe Knightley fan club for support."_

_She rolled over on her side and smiled. He turned his head and they locked eyes._

_"Aren't you sweet?" she asked in a soft voice. She leaned in with painful slowness. Patrick didn't move. Her pinks lips came forward but didn't touch his cheek. Instead they brushed his slightly open mouth. They lingered there lightly, their lips the only parts of their body in contact._

_Then, her hand crept up his chest and behind his neck, bringing her faces closer and locking the kiss in like a bolt. An electric shock went through Patrick's body and he leaned in to her hungrily. Soon both her hands were behind his neck and his traveled to the small of her back._

_She broke off the contact and smiled sweetly. Zoe got up from the bed and Patrick watched her move towards the closet._

_"You're giving up on studying, then?"_

_Her blue eyes twinkled. "No, I'm just getting comfortable. You're more than welcome to stay."_

_Patrick showed no sign of moving._

_"I'm just going to change into my PJs." She said casually._

_Patrick watched her, waiting for her to tell him to close his eyes. She never did. Zoe Knightley continued to stare intensely at him. Some fuzzy, forgotten voice in the back of his head gave him the funniest déjà vu._

_Her hands traveled down to the bottom of her tank top and started to pull the fabric upwards over her head…_

"HOLY SHIT!"

Patrick Woodhouse shot up in his bed. This room was pitch black. His entire body was emitting heat.

"What's going on?" a voice cried form the hallway.

Suddenly Taylor burst into his room with a coat hanger in tow. He only saw his friend panting in bed.

"Jesus, Patrick!" he said. "You scared me half to death. I thought someone was killing your or something."

"And you were going to protect me with that coat hanger?" Patrick asked skeptically.

Taylor shrugged. "I grabbed it impulsively."

"Well, thanks."

"Did you have a bad dream or something?" Taylor asked.

Patrick rolled his eyes. The way his friend said "bad dream" made him feel like a five-year-old. He wasn't sure how to answer the questions though. He couldn't really characterize that dream as "bad."

"It was intense." He finally said. "Really intense."

Taylor eyed him suspiciously. "OK…so you're fine?"

"Yeah, go back to sleep."

Taylor was happy to comply. He turned back to him room and left Patrick alone.

Patrick flopped back on his bed and stared at the ceiling with wide eyes. He left like he was drowning in confusion. That dream was not only freakishly real, but also freakishly….nice. He sort of wanted to go back and see what happened next.

_What the hell?_ He muttered at his unexpected thought, getting up and walking to the kitchen for a glass of water. Since when did he dream about Zoe Knightley in that way? He downed the glass of water at once and took a few deep breaths. Then, quite unexpectedly, the most obvious thing in the world (the one you and I knew this entire time) fell on his head like a cartoon piano.

"Oh my God."


	20. Chapter 20 : Honesty is the Best Policy

**Chapter 20: Honesty is the Best Policy**

At breakfast Patrick couldn't stop strumming his fingers against the table obsessively. Harry inhaled his toast at the table then rushed off to study for his last final. He didn't say a word to Taylor and didn't even acknowledge Patrick's existence.

"Between Harry's cold shoulder and your freaky behavior, I have no idea how to live in this apartment anymore." Taylor hissed to Patrick after Harry left.

Patrick groaned and finished his coffee. "I literally got no sleep last night. Zoe's not returning my calls. Harry is ignoring me. Hell, _I don't even_ want to spend time with me these days."

"By the way, you never explained why Harry was mad."

"Yeah…" Patrick massaged his temple. "About that…"

"I mean, it can't be that bad." said Taylor. "You two are still planning to live together next year in D.C., right?"

Patrick winced. He'd completely forgotten about the lease they just signed. _Damn contracts_. At present he really couldn't imagine being in the same room with Harry.

"It's just…Harry told me he has feelings for Zoe." Patrick spit out the sentence like a swear word.

"That's great!" cried Taylor. "Clearly, we all love Zoe. What's so bad about Harry liking her?"

"Nothing!" Patrick said honestly. "Technically, there is nothing wrong with that at all…"

"Zoe's great." Taylor pointed out.

"_I know_." Patrick said through gritted teeth.

There was a knock on the door. Patrick jumped up and opened it without thinking. He was totally unprepared for what he found on the other side.

"Hello." Zoe said.

Patrick cleared his throat. _This must be like getting glasses for the first time_, he though. _You look at something you see everyday, but only now you can see if more clearly._

"Hi." He answered stupidly. Patrick Woodhouse wasn't used to looking stupid.

She stood there for a second staring awkwardly at her. Zoe blinked and rocked back and forth on her heels. Taylor just didn't know what to think of this spectacle. Patrick was experiencing a dream hangover. Standing in the doorway all he could think about was her lips and…other things.

"Can I come in?" she finally asked.

Patrick stepped out of the way.

"Sorry I didn't answer your voicemails." She said, twisting her hands together. "I just needed some time."

He coughed again. "It's fine."

Zoe came forward with her arms outstretched.

"Wait – What are you doing?" Patrick asked stepping back in surprise.

"Uh…I think she wants to hug you, Pat." Taylor said, trying not to laugh.

Zoe looked at Patrick and smirked. She tried again with success, wrapping her arms around his middle and resting her head on his chest. Patrick closed his eyes. How could he have done this hundreds of times before and never felt this way? It was awesome…

"Uh- Patrick?" she asked.

"Yes?"

"Can you let go of me please?"

He jumped back and smiled. "Right, sorry. I don't know what came over me."

"I just wanted to stop by and say goodbye."

"Goodbye? Why goodbye?" he asked, trying not to sound frantic.

"I finished my last test this morning. I want to visit my family before graduation so I'll be gone for a week."

"Oh."

She bit her bottom lip, Patrick could tell she was holding something back.

"I guess I'll be going now." she said, turning to leave.

'Wait a sec." he ran in front of her and blocked the door.

"Yes?" she looked up at him. Her big blue eyes almost made Patrick loose his train of thought.

"Will you be seeing Kyle and Sarah while you're gone?" he asked.

Zoe nodded. "I really needed to talk to my sister." She laughed nervous. "There are some very important life decisions coming up that only she can help me with."

Zoe gave him one last tight hug. Patrick reluctantly stepped out of her way and let her leave. He lingered at the door for a second.

Taylor tapped him on the shoulder.

"Oh hi." said Patrick, turning to face his friend.

Taylor looked highly concerned. "Are you going to tell me what the hell is going on?"

"What do you mean?"

"Patrick, you just were awkward in front of Zoe – the girl who has seen you in cupcake boxer shorts. You've never been awkward in front of her. She's like your sister."

Patrick felt a little ill at Taylor's last sentence. "You know how I had a nightmare last night?"

Taylor nodded. "Yeah, I remember the coat hanger."

Patrick rolled his eyes. "Well, Zoe was in it."

"OK…"

"No, you're not understanding me." Patrick clarified. "Zoe was _in my dream_."

Taylor continued to look confused, then his friend's full meaning swept over him. Patrick watched Taylor's expression change.

"Ohhhhhh." Taylor said. "She was _in your dream_. So what?"

"That's never happened before!" Patrick explained.

Taylor looked surprised. "Really? That doesn't seem probable. She's with you all the time. The thought has never crossed your subconscious?"

"Well, not so explicitly…I mean, it seemed so real. The dream started off completely normal. I was in her bed. She threw a pillow at me. We were just studying together. Then, suddenly…we weren't."

Taylor smirked. "I love how you're freaking out about this. So what? You're attracted to Zoe. She's an attractive girl. It doesn't mean you're in love with her, it just means you had a dream."

"It's not just the dream!" Patrick blurted out. "It was that awkward hug just now and our dance at the wedding and…" his voice faded into incoherent mumbles

Taylor saw his friend's face. It was reminiscent of Bambi or some equally panicked, pathetic fictional character. Taylor's smirk fell as realized what was really going on. "WAIT - do you have real feelings for –?"

"It's impossible!" Patrick declared confidently, shaking off his moment of weakness. He got up and started pacing around the room. "I've thought about this since last night. I couldn't possible like her like that. I mean, we've slept in the same bed together! She's changed with me in the room – and I've never been tempted to peak! I burp in front of her on a regular basis. I've never hit on her and she's never acted the way other girls act around me-"

"Well, that's because Zoe's not like other girls." Taylor pointed out. "Also, you actually respect Zoe, so that might explain all those other things."

Patrick grabbed fistfuls of his curly hair. "It just doesn't make sense."

Taylor stared at his unfortunate friend, wanting more than anything to help him or offer clarity. Sadly, boys were naturally bad that this sort of thing. Taylor decided to channel his wise girlfriend. The wondered what Maggie would do in this situation.

"Patrick," Taylor started again with an idea. "Give me your phone."

Patrick handed it over without question. Taylor started to play around with it. A second later he returned it and sighed.

"Patrick," he said. "Do you realize that your last five dialed numbers have been Zoe?"

"She hasn't been returning my calls after the lacrosse game!" he said defensively.

"But even before then, you called her more than anyone else. Look!" he pointed to the screen. "You call her more than your mother. You call her more than me!"

"Because I have to!" he explained.

"Why?"

"How else am I going to see her?"

"Listen to what you're saying, Pat!" Taylor challenged. "Why do you need to see Zoe constantly? _Why do you need to talk to her everyday?_ Why have you guys been eating Sunday dinners together since freshman year? WHY do you know and love every member of her family and have most of them in your contacts? There are even pictures of her on your phone. Patrick, I'm starting to think your electronics know more about you than you do."

"It is a smart phone..." Patrick said lamely. Patrick didn't know what else to do besides joke in this situation.

Taylor eyed him, trying to get under Patrick's deflective layers of humor.

"So what are you going to do about all of this...confusion?" Taylor asked.

"Nothing." Patrick said bitterly. "She likes Harry. I've missed my chance."

Taylor sighed. "Look, how do you know that she likes Harry?"

"Harry wouldn't make this stuff up." Patrick explained. "She had been spending more time with him. Plus, she's the last girl in the world that would ever play games with a guy. That's what she's probably dying to talk to Sarah about. She needs guy advice. This is a nightmare."

"You never know." Taylor said, trying his best to instill hope in the situation. "You and Zoe are practically a couple already– you just skipped all the way to that last, senior citizen stage of a relationship with close proximity, no sex, and brutal honesty."

Patrick burst out laughing. "I've never though of it that way before."

"I have to say, Patrick" Taylor said, standing up and placing his hands smugly in his pockets. "It's good to finally see you unhinged like this – especially over a girl. "

We should all pause for a moment at the end of this scene and be very proud of these two gentlemen. It's so rare that a boy like Patrick is able to recognize his own emotions so honestly. It's also rare for a boy like Taylor to offer such wise perspective on a friend's romantic problems. For _both _of those things to happen in the _same space_ at the _same time_ is a practically a supernatural occurrence.


	21. Chapter 21 : Irony

**Chapter 21: In Which Patrick Woodhouse Appreciates Irony**

Maggie was feeling great. She had finally finished her tests and had officially put her last year of college behind her. There were no more papers to write, presentations to make, or thick books to buy and pretend to read. She was living in a post academic world and was feeling pretty good about it.

Her last bit of business was to return the stack of library books she'd accumulated over the year. She ventured over to the stacks and waited for a librarian to assist her.

She waited.

…and waited.

After ten minutes of awkwardly balancing a tower of books under her chin, she found a table to set them down on so she could explore the maze of shelves for someone who could help her.

"Hello?" she stage whispered around the deserted library floor. "Can anyone help me?"

Without thinking she opened the door to a small study room. What she found inside would be the shock of her afternoon.

"What the –_ what_?"

There, in a small study room in stacks, was Vanessa and Jake in a semi-compromising position. Maggie's mouth must have been wide open at the site of them. Luckily, all parties were still decent. Vanessa's hair was very messy and her lipstick was currently smeared all over Jake's face. Jake looked positively mortified. Vanessa just looked shocked.

"Don't tell Taylor!" Vanessa yelled instinctively.

Maggie was still speechless. She wasn't entirely sure how this happened.

"You two?" she asked. "Together?"

Jake sighed. "Yeah."

Maggie only nodded and closed the door. She fully intended on abandoning her library book quest to escape the complicated situation. She would have too, if a certain someone hadn't shown up.

Patrick Woodhouse came waltzing into the library stacks at the most inconvenient time imaginable. Hands in his pocket and whistling quietly, he spotted Maggie and smiled. Panicking, she positioned herself between him and the door.

"What's wrong with you?" Patrick asked, observing Maggie's nervous demeanor.

"Oh nothing. What are you doing here? You're never in the library!"

"That's a myth! I hope Taylor hasn't been spreading lies about me." He said. "Anyway, I have to pay my library fines or they won't let me graduate. Have you seen a librarian around?"

"Ahhh no. Let's look in another part of the library far away from here!" she suggested.

Just before Maggie could drag him away, Patrick stopped and turned towards the door.

"Were there voices in there?" he asked.

"No!" Maggie cried, blocking the door again. "There's nothing in there."

"Yeah right." Patrick said. "You're the worst liar ever."

Maggie looked a little sad now. "Please, Patrick. Don't go in. I – I don't think you're going to like what you see."

Now Patrick _really_ wanted to know what was behind that door. He pretended to walk away in defeat, but quickly dodged Maggie and finally turned the knob.

Patrick Woodhouse was silent for a full minute, staring awkwardly at a stunned Jake and Vanessa. Maggie looked at her friend helplessly. She was afraid he might cry or punch Jake. She knew he'd been interested in Vanessa this year and had no idea how Patrick would react. Patrick always got the girl. Well, until now.

Just when Maggie thought all was lost, Patrick Woodhouse burst into laugher.

"Patrick?" she asked, feeling very confused. Maybe this was some sort of hysterical opposite reaction. "Are you OK?"

He couldn't speak, but only raised his hand with a thumbs up sign. He bent over and grabbed his side, trying to suppress his amusement.

Jake looked very embarrassed and very concerned. Vanessa was beet red with what Maggie could only assume was extreme guilt.

"Patrick, I'm really sorry." Vanessa said lamely, straightening her shirt.

Still laughing, Patrick waved her off.

"OK, this is officially weird." said Maggie. "I want to know what is going on. You – " she pointed to Jake. "Speak!"

Jake spilled the beans, explaining everything. He told Maggie and Patrick about how he and Vanessa met in New York after he got back from teaching. They fell last and dated over the summer. It seemed that Jake had followed Vanessa to school under the pretense of living with Ben and working in the area.

Patrick's laughter was fading now. He stood up straight and entered the conversation. "So Jake here has been your secret boyfriend this entire year? And you've made him watch you flirt with other guys for months…because why exactly?"

Jake looked a bit affronted my Patrick's interpretation of events. "Well," he started. "Her parents wouldn't have approved…"

"Why?" Maggie asked. "Who wouldn't love you, Jake?"

Vanessa's cheeks turned even redder. "I just turned eighteen."

Maggie looked scandalized.

"So two two were….before…"

Jake looked at his feet and Vanessa avoided all eye contact.

"Ah man, Taylor is going to freak out!" Patrick said. "No wonder you didn't tell him."

"I'm surprised you're not freaking out!" Maggie said, turning on Patrick. "I mean, we're you two..?" she motioned between Patrick and Vanessa, not really wanting to finish her sentence.

"Jake," Patrick said, wanting to make an important clarification. "I want to assure you that I never touched Vanessa and I have absolutely no romantic feelings for her whatsoever."

"Really?" Vanessa asked a bit too quickly.

Maggie raised her eyebrow. "Don't sound disappointed." she mumbled.

"Anyway," Patrick said. "Maggie and I will do you a favor and let you explain things to Taylor. You expect either one of us to lie to him, but we'll let you tell your story. Deal?"

Vanessa and Jake both looked very sorry that they had picked that study room to fool around in. They reluctantly agreed to Patrick's terms. Later that week Vanessa met up her overprotective cousin and broke the news to him. Needless to say Taylor did not take it well. Patrick and Maggie had to deal with the aftereffects.

"So let me get this straight…" Taylor said, sitting in their living room. Maggie was rubbing his back, trying to calm him down. Patrick was there for moral support. "My barely legal cousin has been having a fling with some guy who is older than us? Really?"

"See, and you were worried about me." Patrick said light heartedly. Maggie just shook her head at him and mouthed "Bad timing."

Taylor was too distracted to care about Patrick's comment. "I can't believe this was happening under my nose all year. Her parents made me swear to look after her."

"Well…" Maggie interjected. "Jake is still a good guy, Taylor. They really seem to care for each other."

Patrick didn't doubt that. He cold still recall the smeared lipstick and make-out hair form the library.

"What really gets me is how she played you, Patrick." Maggie said angrily. "As a female, just let me apologize for my entire sex right now. She was so out of line all year. Imagine that – throwing yourself at a guy in front of the real guy you're dating. I'm surprised you're so cool about it!"

Patrick shrugged. "I can appreciate the irony."

Maggie got up and hugged Patrick like he was a wounded child in denial. "Patrick, don't you have a heart? Just let it out. How can you just laugh that this whole situation? You can Vanessa almost dated."

Patrick let Maggie hug him. Taylor looked up and caught his eye.

"Oh I have my reasons…" Patrick said, patting her on the back. "I'm sure time will _heal my wounds_."

Patrick could've cared less about all this drama. He'd never been emotionally invested in Vanessa or any other girl before now. Upon further thought, he realized that Vanessa wasn't the one for him anyway. Sure, he had wanted her at the beginning of the year, but Patrick's taste had evolved since then. Now he was less concerned about what he _wanted_ and more concerned about what he _needed_. What he needed was someone classy and kind. He needed someone honest. He needed a girl who wasn't afraid to smash lemon cake in his face.

He needed Zoe Knightley.

* * *

The phone rang, and rang, and rang.

"Hello, Knightley residence."

"Oh thank god someone's finally home!" cried Patrick from the other end of the line.

"Can I please speak to Zoe?"

"Patrick – is that you?"

Clearly, it was Sophie on the phone. Usually Patrick loved to talk to her, but at this moment in time, all he wanted to do was speed through their usual small talk and skip to her sister.

"Heya Sophie!" he said pleasantly. "Is Zoe there?" he repeated.

"Lemme see. ZOOOOE!"

Patrick's ears rang, but he didn't care. It was almost graduation and his original plan was to wait for Zoe to return before talking to her, but he was getting restless. He needed to hear her voice at the very least.

"She's in the shower." Sophie said. "May I take a message?"

Patrick sighed. That was _just _what he needed to hear.

"No, I guess not." He said.

"Zoe's been really busy lately." Sophie said. "She's been packing and talking with Sarah a lot."

"What about?" he asked quickly. "Do you know what she's been talking about?"

"Beats me." Said Sophie. "They've been very mysterious about it."

"Hmmm…" For a second Patrick considered using his best friend's little sister as a spy. He judgment, however, got the better of him.

"I guess I'll have to wait to talk to her."

"We're all driving together. We're leaving early in the morning and should get there by tomorrow night!"

Patrick imagined a van filled with noisy Knightley children of various ages. He felt sorry for Zoe already.


	22. Chapter 22: Misunderstandings

**Chapter 22: Misunderstandings**

The next night Harry was working and O'Grady's was an absolute mess. The booths were filled with seniors prematurely celebrating their achievements before graduation and reminiscing over alcohol. Harry wished he could've been one of them, but his duties called. Harry zigzagged through the tables, collecting cups and bottles and wiping down the tables as new groups filtered in.

"Hey Harry." Mary called. "Can you help me with this mopping situation?" She was standing at the doorway near the backroom, signaling for him to follow her.

"Sure!" He rushed over from the bar, thankful to get away from the demanding crowd of customers. Once in the backroom, he gave her a hand with a heavy bucket of soapy water. During the many hours they spent together at work this semester, Harry had learned a lot about Mary. One thing he was sure of was that she had the patience of a saint and the upper body strength of a small child.

"You're a life saver!" she said, smiling up at him.

He laughed.

"What?" she asked.

"You have a -" Harry gently wiped some subs from her right cheek. Her eyes widened slightly behind her glasses, but he didn't notice this.

"Thanks." She said.

"Can you handle it from here?" he asked.

"Sure."

Harry realized his hand was still on the side of her face. "Right," he said, quickly placing it down. "Back to work"

Sadly, he wasn't paying too much attention and about two steps later Harry encountered a wet patch of floor. He didn't have a prayer. In one almost graceful movement, his feet slipped out from under him and he was on his back. Harry groaned, mostly out of embarrassment.

"Thank God no one was there to see that…" he muttered as he lay in a pool of soapy water.

He heard Mary chuckling above him. "Well, I saw it!"

Quite suddenly (and very unexpectedly), Harry pulled Mary down next to him. She landed on her butt with her mouth open in shock.

"I can't believe you just did that!" she cried, still half laughing. She grabbed a pile of subs and smashed it into his hair. Harry retaliated with splashes of water from the bucket. Now they were having a full on water fight in the middle of the back room. All the stress and tension from Harry's week seemed to melt away in this unexpected, soapy bath.

Mary held her hands up after a few minutes. "I give up! Please have mercy on me."

She was completely soaked and Harry imagined he looked the same. The right lens of Mary's glasses was foggy from the steam of the hot water. Her brown hair was hanging longer with the weight of the water, looking darker and more curly than usual. Drops of liquid were still dripping down her face slowly. Harry wasn't sure why, but he was taking note of all these details.

"Harry?" she asked to his vacant expression. She tucked her wet hair behind her ear and waited for him to say something.

Then, without warning and without much forethought, Harry did the first spontaneous thing in his life.

He kissed her.

* * *

After arriving in town for graduation, Gran and Mrs. Woodhouse's first order of business was to visit Patrick's apartment. Patrick had been expecting this and both he and Taylor had spent a good amount of time cleaning the living room. The mess they found under cushions and in corners had been shocking.

"Is it always this neat in here?" Gram asked suspiciously, waving her cane around the room and touching surfaces for dust.

Patrick smirked. "Yes, Gram."

"Hmmmm…"

"Have you checked into your hotel room, Mrs. Woodhouse?" Taylor asked.

"No." she answered. "We just got in. It's been so long since we've seen this place. Patrick hardly ever invites me."

Patrick blushed. "Ah, come on Mom…"

"Where's Zoe?" Mrs. Woodhouse asked, peering around the room as if the girl would jump out from behind the furniture and surprise them all.

"Mom, she's not always here." He explained. "I'll see her tonight. I promised her we would go for a run together."

Earlier that day Patrick had finally gotten a hold of his friend. She answered her phone and blasted him with a symphony of background noise – various Knightley siblings screaming in the car and fighting. He'd heard her yell "Hello," "run," and "tonight" which had been enough for him to deduce the basics of her suggestion.

"And what about that third roommate of yours, Patrick?" asked Gram, turning back to him. "You know – the tall one who went to the wedding with Zoe?"

"Oh. _Him_." Patrick said. "Harry is –"

Just has Patrick was about to awkwardly explain Harry's absence, the man himself walked through the door in the most usual state.

"Oh my goodness…" Gran said, staring at poor Harry.

He shuffled in sadly, damp from head to toe. Each of his steps came with an awkward squishing noise. Patrick spotted some soap in his hair.

"Uh…are you OK?" Patrick asked him.

Harry nodded like he was listening, but he looked like he was in a sort of trance. "I'm fine." He assured them all. "It's been an interesting day…"

"Looks like it!" Gran remarked.

"I think I'll go dry off." He said, sauntering slowly to the bathroom.

Patrick raised his eyebrow skeptically and peered toward Harry's now shut door. Never before had he seen his friend so frazzled. Harry had always been a bit strange, but tonight he seemed positively mad.

After his mother and grandmother left for the night, Patrick pressed his ear to Harry's door.

"Maybe you should leave him alone." Taylor suggested. "He hadn't really been in the mood to talk to you all week."

"He has to talk to somebody." Patrick said. "Something is obviously off with him."

Disregarding his hesitation and the knowledge that Harry hated his guts right now, Patrick confidently entered the room. Taylor followed. What they found inside was beyond shocking.

There was Harry, perched pathetically on his bed still in wet clothes. His eyes were completely zoned out, staring straight ahead at nothing in particular. He obviously had not noticed that his soggy clothes were bleeding onto his bedspread or that his two roommates had entered the room.

"Harry?" Patrick asked slowly approaching him. "Are you OK?"

Harry managed to nod. A tiny smile broke across his face.

"So…why are you wet?" Taylor asked the obvious question.

Harry's smile grew larger, but he didn't answer the question.

Patrick waved his hand in front of Harry's face. "Hello? Are you sure you are –"

"She kissed me." He finally spoke in a dreamy tone.

Taylor's eyes widened and Patrick's hand dropped to his side like a fifty-pound weight.

"W-What?" he asked again, voice cracking.

Harry got up and started to change out of his wet clothing. "I kissed her…and she kissed me back." He repeated. "I can't believe it. It just happened."

"Uh…" Taylor looked back and forth between Patrick and Harry waiting for some sort of bomb to go off. Harry was walking on cloud nine and, judging my the madness in Patrick's eyes, he was in some version of his personal hell.

"_Wow…_" Taylor continued as the only person in the room capable of speech. "That's really something, Harry. That's really…yeah…"

Patrick cleared his throat and shook off his stunned silence. "Congrats, bro." he said plainly. He turned on his heel and quickly left the room. Taylor followed him, leaving their spellbound roommate to replay his moment of glory over and over in his mind.

About fifty thoughts and emotions were running through Patrick's head. He felt like an over charged battery. He quickly changed into his gym shorts and left his room.

"Where are you going?" Taylor asked him.

"I promised Zoe I would go running with her." He answered.

"No!" Taylor cried. Blocking the exit from his friend. "You're nuts. You can't see her right now."

Patrick rolled his eyes. "Why not? I'm fine. I'm not a chick. I won't let me emotions get in the way…"

"You say you're fine, but you aren't. I know you." Taylor explained. "This always happens to you. You get big news and about an hour later you explode. Trust me when I tell you that you don't want to explode about this kiss in front of Zoe. You'll say something stupid."

"_Gee, thanks_." Patrick crossed his arms. "Please get out of my way."

"Yeah right!" Taylor said, holding his ground.

"Look," said Patrick. "It's not like this is a surprise. I knew that Harry liked her and that it was a possibility….It's not like this came out of left field for me. I can be an adult and go running with my best friend. It's the night before graduation, Taylor. Let me go."

Taylor didn't look convinced. "Trust me, Pat. Right now this is the nicest thing I can do for you."

Patrick sighed and feigned defeat. He slowly turned around, then quickly dodged his friend with a two-step shuffle, knocking Taylor out of the doorway and running out of the apartment and down the stairs.

"Damn it!" Taylor cried. How did that always work?

Off went Patrick Woodhouse – sprinting head first into emotional suicide.

* * *

For the first time in his life Patrick Woodhouse was trapped in a lose-lose situation. If he spoke his mind, he would be forced to unravel the complicated emotions that were pulsing through his being. If he held it in (like he should) he would be facing some serious agony.

They met on their usual street corner; a spot he'd grown to know well after years of similar late night runs. She had always preferred to run in the cool evening air, but he'd never let her go alone…not in the four years he'd known her.

Zoe Knightley was stretching when he arrived. She had her red hair pulled up into a messy bun. His stomach did a flip.

"Took you long enough." she said with a smirk. "I got in a few hours ago. I'm so exhausted. I love my family, but sometimes I forget after I've been locked in a car with them all day…"

Here she was chattering away as usual – like nothing was different. Patrick stared down at her with confusion. _How could she just stretch there nonchalantly after kissing one of his friends? How was it possible that she wasn't stuttering and nervous? How could she face him so casually?_

"You're not very talkative…" Zoe observed.

He shrugged, trying not to look as icy as he felt. "I guess I'm tired too. Shall we run?"

He took off before she could answer. He made his strides longer than usual – something he knew was harder for her to match. That didn't stop Zoe. A minute later she was by his side, matching his rhythm against the pavement. He heard their breathing psych up together. They were like a machine - running and curving along sidewalks together, expelling air in and out like some orchestrated duo.

They stayed that way for a while. Patrick tended to forget about time when he ran. Suddenly he looked around and realized that they had reached their usual halfway mark. He slowed and grabbed a nearby lamp post to stretch against.

Zoe also paused to tie her shoe. She then used the bottom of her tee shirt to wipe the sweat from her brow, but suddenly decided to get rid of it all together. Without ceremony she quickly stripped it from her body and swung it over her shoulder.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"

Patrick Woodhouse's breathy voice rang out loudly down the street. Zoe jumped back in surprise.

"Uh – "

"Put your shirt back on NOW!" he cried, averting his eyes.

"You're not wearing a shirt either!" she pointed to his bare chest. "It's 90 degrees outside, Pat!"

"I'm a guy!"

"Oh I know that!" She said, crossing her arms in agitation. "Geeze, I run in a sports bras _all the time_…"

"_Whatever_…" he mumbled, turning away and stretching the other leg now.

"OK, what's the deal? Are you mad about something?" Zoe put her hands on her hips, her face now turning pink either from heat or anger. "Is this about the Vanessa thing? Is that where all of this attitude coming from? She's not worth it, Patrick!"

"What? No!" he assured her, still avoiding direct eye contact (especially since she hadn't put her shirt back on). "No way! I could care less about that."

"Then what is it?" Zoe asked desperately.

"It's – " he started pathetically, but stopped himself.

"WHAT?" she demanded.

"D-Do you have anything to tell me?" he asked pointedly, not helping himself. "I thought you might have a certain important subject on your mind…something you might want to share with me."

Her blue eyes widened in shock and he saw her melt in front of him. They locked gazes and electricity went through both their bodies. Thus began the most intense, misinformed, and misunderstood exchange of their friendship.

"Who told you?" Zoe asked, her voice sounded small and shy – two words not normally associated with her. "Was it Sarah?"

"It doesn't matter. I found out." He said simply, doing a poor job of hiding his internal pain. "I know everything!"

_"E-Everything?" _

"Yes." Patrick said, visions of her and Harry kissing streaking through his mind and irrationally urging him to continue this unwise confrontation. "I know all about your little _romantic_ secret, Zoe. Were you planning on telling me about these _feelings you had_?"

She was breathing hard now and not because of the running. "I – I didn't think I could, Pat. I wanted to, but-"

"But you kept it from me!" he cried. He threw his hands up in the air and ran them through his messy curls. "Geeze, Zoe! Nothing will be the same after this, you realize that don't you? _We'll _never be the same." He motioned between them frantically. "And I find this out the night before our graduation!"

"You don't sound very happy about it." she said numbly, looking down at the sidewalk.

"Of course I'm not happy about it!" Patrick cried. "I mean...I suspected something but you didn't say anything so I thought it might pass-"

"I hoped it would!" she interrupted. "I really did, Pat. You don't think I know how much this complicates things?"

"Well obviously, you didn't think it through." Patrick said.

Zoe's eyes suddenly ignited. "I'm sorry, but I'm not going to apologize for my feelings! It's not like to chose to have them. They were natural and sincere and that doesn't make me a bad person or a weak person. Some people can't help who they fall in love with and I'm one of them!"

Patrick froze. _Did she just say love_? Zoe was sniffling now - something Patrick wasn't used to seeing. It was a heartbreaking sight and he wasn't sure he could stomach it, even though he was also hurting a great deal too.

"Silly me." she croaked. "I thought you'd understand and be nice even if you didn't...even if you didn't..."

Zoe wasn't strong enough to finish her sentence. Lucky for her, a taxi approached them suddenly. Zoe jumped into the street and raised her hand. It halted in front of her. She opened the door.

"You can run back alone!" she cried angrily now, some tears escaping through her eyes though she was obviously fighting them back to the best of her ability. "I thought that our friendship was strong enough to withstand this, but maybe I was wrong."

A flash of red hair. The slamming of a car door. The revving of an engine.

And she was gone.

Patrick stared after the car with his mouth half open, feeling completely shaken. Taylor had been right. He'd been so right.

He should've never opened his big, fat mouth.

* * *

**a/n **- That was for everyone who has reviewed and (rightly) chastised me for neglecting this fic. I'm sorry and I will make it up to you!


	23. Chapter 23: Endings, Beginnings

**Chapter 23: The End, the Beginning**

Patrick Woodhouse woke up the next morning with what can only be described as an emotional hangover.

After his crash-and-burn confrontation with Zoe the night before, he'd numbly returned home and gone to bed before either of his roommates could catch him for a conversation. All Patrick wanted to do was sleep off his bad behavior. Unfortunately, due to his graduation he was forced to rise early the next morning and face the cruel light of day…without his best friend.

"You look sick, Patrick." Gran felt his forehead at breakfast.

"I'm fine, Gran. Honest."

She shook her head with concern. Patrick was sitting at a local diner with his mother, grandmother, Kyle and Sarah. He noticed that Sarah was staring at him with particular distaste. Patrick wondered if she'd had a chance to talk with Zoe in the past few hours…that might explain the passive aggressive animosity.

When the meal ended Kyle tossed Patrick his graduation cap.

"Better get a move on, buddy. You should be lining up for the ceremony soon and we need to find some seats."

After parting with his family, Patrick went to Central Campus and found himself amongst a sea of black togas. Almost as if sleepwalking, he half-heartedly made his way to the center of his peers. Everyone was chattering excitedly. The weather was perfect. In fact, everything seemed perfect. The main stage and neat rows of chairs were set outside the school's main library. The green summer scene was framed with rows of blossomed trees and collegiate marble pillars. If Patrick was in a better mood, he might've appreciated it all.

"We've come a long way, haven't we?" asked a familiar voice.

Patrick looked over and saw that Taylor and Maggie had just found him. They were beaming and holding hands. For the first time that day Patrick smiled. His old friend was right – the two of them had gone on a long, interesting journey together. From elementary school to higher education, their streak had remained unbroken.

Patrick sighed. "I'm really going to miss you guys next year."

Taylor winced at the thought. "Let's say goodbyes later, shall we? Enjoy the moment for now."

"Hey-" Maggie said, looking around. "Where's Zoe? I figured she'd be with you."

Patrick paused. "Uh – she's probably with the lacrosse team…"

Maggie furrowed her brow. "That can't be right. I thought we always said we'd walk together. That was the plan!"

Patrick knew it was neither the time nor the place to explain why Zoe was avoiding him like the plague. The story was too long and complicated to unload minutes before one of the "happiest" moments of their lives. Maggie was right, though. Zoe should've been there. Each time Patrick had imagined this day in his head she had been there beside him. Whether it was rainy, boring, or amazing…his daydreaming always included a certain red-haired someone walking next to him as he graduated.

"Hey everyone!" Harry appeared flustered and disheveled. His cap was crooked on his head and his tie was loosened around his neck. Still, he looked quite pleased with himself.

"What are you doing here?" Patrick asked tentatively, subtly searching around to see if Zoe might be around him.

"Graduating, of course!" Harry answered with a smirk.

Patrick gave Harry a double take. For weeks the pair of them had been so distant, it was strange to see Harry just walk up casually and offer an olive branch. Then again, despite all the jealousy and bitterness brewing in Patrick, he couldn't make himself hate Harry. Harry was a good guy – better than him in most ways – and Patrick couldn't help but admire his good nature and kind instincts. Frankly, Zoe had made a wise decision in picking him.

"Pat –" Harry said, reading the thoughtfulness on Patrick's face. "Can I talk to you for a sec?"

Patrick nodded civilly and followed his friend to the side away from the crowd. Once they were alone, Harry turned to him. There was a confidence in his face that Patrick had never seen before.

"I want to apologize for the way I've been acting." Harry said, one hand firmly on his friend's shoulder. "I asked for your honest opinion and you gave it to me. I don't know why I was so sensitive about it…"

"No." Patrick shook his head sadly. "I'm the one that should be sorry. I need to stop butting into people's lives."

"Yeah, well it all worked in the end!" Harry said happily.

Patrick winced. "Yeah…I guess it did."

"I didn't even get a chance to tell you about it last night!" Harry cried. "I was still in shock from that kiss…"

Patrick held up his hands politely. "I don't need the details, man. I-I'm happy for you." He took a deep breath and swallowed his pride.

"I'm glad." Harry said with relief. "At first I thought you'd be mad at me. After all, she's not really your favorite person on the planet…"

Patrick Woodhouse raised his eyebrow dramatically.

"Uh…she's up there, though." Patrick corrected him. _Had Harry been awake at any point this year? Did he not notice that he and Zoe were close? _"I mean, after my Mom and maybe Bono, she's a pretty solid third –"

"Who –_Mary_?"

A deafening pause ensued in which that name – that short four-letter name – sank in to Patrick's brain like water in a thirsty flowerpot.

"WAIT!" the word exploded from Patrick's mouth. "You kissed Mary last night? _Mary from O'Grady's?_ She's the one you were talking about?"

"Yeah…" Harry said, eyeing his friend with concern.

Patrick's eyes widened. It felt like someone had yanked a chair from under him, displacing his center of gravity. All of a sudden, the events of the past few weeks were sharpening in retrospect – his feelings, Zoe's hints, their painful conversation the night before. The truth of it all was both exciting and terrifying and the mixed, confused reaction was now etched on Patrick Woodhouse's face.

"Uh..Patrick." Harry said, poking his friend to make sure he was still alive. "You don't look too good. Are you OK?"

A silly, boyish grin broke out on Patrick's face. Without explaining himself, he simply turned on his heel and bolted in the opposite direction.

"Where are you going?" Harry called out, but Patrick was long gone.

His old track skills resurrected, Patrick sprinted single-mindedly through a sea of college graduates. He wasn't going to stop until he found the one he was looking for.

* * *

Patrick remembered the first day he met Zoe Knightley – mostly because the unexpectedly humbling experience had struck a chord with him. It had been the first weekend of college, back when Patrick was a cockier, unfiltered version of himself. He and the boys from his floor were hanging out in the freshman quad, basking in the sun and their newfound freedom.

_"What about that one?" Taylor asked the other guys, pointing subtly to a girl playing frisbee._

_One of boys in the crowd smirked. "I don't know…I'd be generous and give her a five…maybe a six after dark."_

_Some of the other guys found this hilarious. Patrick laughed along with them. He sat confidently next to Taylor, leaning back casually on the staircase outside their building. He was the definition of cool, and even though the other guys had just met him, they were already catching on to this fact. Patrick was a natural leader. Even in a new place with strangers (except for Taylor), he effortlessly expelled an influential aura._

_"What do you think, Pat?" one of the guys turned towards Patrick, obviously valuing his opinion._

_He shrugged. "I'd agree with five, but I'd give her friend an eight, though." Patrick said nodded his head toward the other female. "I swear, college is going to be –"_

_"Excuse me!"_

_All the boys turned toward an agitated voice and saw a pale redhead staring at them with her hands on her hips. She had a sweaty face, an ipod and sneakers on, which led Patrick to believe that she had been jogging by when she overheard them. He remembered how appalled she looked…how there was a crinkle in her nose because she was so mad and how her blue eyes practically jumped out at him with judgment._

_"Can we help you?" Patrick asked with attitude, obviously unaware of who he was dealing with._

_She huffed and crossed her arms. "Were you boys just "rating" the female population in the quad?"_

_"Uh…" Taylor began poorly, shifting his gaze to Patrick to see what he would do about this. Patrick seemed unfazed by the girl before him. She was probably just another co-ed with feminist tendencies and her panties in a twist._

_"Yes." Patrick's unabashed, unapologetic answer rang out confidently. The girl's eyes narrowed._

_"That's the sadest thing I've ever heard…" she said, shaking her head._

_"What?" one boy called out. "It's not like we're hurting anyone…"_

_"No." The redhead corrected, eyeing Patrick in particular. She could tell that he was the ring leader. "No, I'm not talking about the girls. I'm talking you all! You're the sad ones! I wonder how secretly insecure and intimidated you little boys must feel on your first week fo college to resort to such low activity on a Saturday afternoon."_

_Patrick's mouth dropped. Were all girls in college like this…so harsh and honest? So direct and powerful? He would soon learn that the answer to that question was no, but for right now he just stared in awe the strange female before him._

_"Why don't you just get up and talk to them?" she continued, rolling her eyes and motioning to the girls. "Sure, it requires actual courage and manliness to truly interact with girls instead of pointlessly heckling them, but if you're not going to start now, then when? You've got only four years to develop solid social skills, so I suggest you begin as soon as possible."_

_One of the boys whistled under his breath. Patrick cleared his throat nervously, attempting to keep his cool exterior._

_The girl merely shook her head at the pathetic display, shoved her headphone back in, and took off._

_Patrick wasn't sure why, but he found himself following her. He made up some lame excuse to leave his friends and started jogging after her curiously._

_"Hey!" he called out. "Hey you!"_

_The redhead slowed down and took out one of her earpieces, but didn't stop. Patrick caught up with her and matched her pace._

_"What do you want?" she asked skeptically through breaths._

_"I want to know your name."_

_"Zoe." She said. "Zoe Knightley."_

_"Cool. I'm Patrick Woodhouse."_

_"I know who you are."_

_He couldn't help it – a silly smirk found its way across his face at those words. Zoe rolled her eyes when she saw it._

_"Whatever – I heard a few of the girls from my hall talking about you. Don't let it get to your head."_

_"Well, what did they say?" he asked, trying not to sound too eager._

_Now it was her turn to smirk. "Wouldn't you like to know…"_

_For some reason he kept following her. Maybe he was enjoying the exercise, but in retrospect Patrick knew he'd done it because for the first time since move-in he'd finally stumbled across someone interesting…you know, besides Taylor._

_"Why are you following me?" she asked. "This is getting rather odd. Usually when I insult someone they don't normally join me for a run."_

_Patrick shrugged. "Well, you were right. We were being lame."_

_Zoe was surprised. In her snap judgment of Patrick Woodhouse (and from the rumors she'd heard from her female peers), she didn't expect him to be a reasonable, person to conceed defeat. Usually boys didn't take criticism so well._

_"Ok…" she said awkwardly, continuing on with him._

_"So, do you run a lot?" Patrick asked her._

_She nodded. "I'm on a sports scholarship, so I have to keep in shape. You?"_

_"Used to be on the track team in high school." He explained. "Do you usually stop during your runs and give harsh life advice to passers-by?"_

_Zoe laughed. "No, but I made an exception for you. Actually, I don't normally run during the day. I prefer night jogs."_

_"You shouldn't run alone at night." Patrick said bluntly – though with more reason than arrogance. This also surprised Zoe. "I'll go with you."_

_She looked to the side and examined this boy next to her, finally giving him a proper look. He was everything that the girls had said he would be: tall, lean, and charming with a nice head of hair. What they hadn't told Zoe was that he was also a decent human being, though it took a while to notice beneath the alpha male show he put on. _

_Zoe sighed and stopped in front of her dorm. Patrick stopped too, suddenly realizing that he'd just run half a mile in khaki shorts._

_"You can come." Zoe said in reference to her nighttime runs. Patrick smiled in satisfaction._

_"…if you can keep up, that is." she finished playfully, raising her eyebrows with attitude and closing the door behind her._

_

* * *

****_


	24. Chapter 24: Finally

**Chapter 24: Finally!**

Patrick was looking for red – any flash of red would do. That would be enough to catch his eye and lead him towards the spunky, bossy (yet endearing) girl of his dreams in this sea of look-alikes.

"_Damn it!_" he muttered, weaving through the lines. "On the one day we're all dressed the same….ZOE! ZOE!"

He had little else to do but call out her name. Patrick knew he was acting nuts, but this level of self-awareness wasn't stopping him from carrying out his antics.

"Has anyone seen a red head?" he called out desperately to the strangers surrounding him.

Then, he saw her standing there. She was surrounded by members of her lacrosse team – girls that Patrick had previous been attracted to and (sometimes) hit on. None of them mattered anymore, though. Now they were just bodies tragically standing between him and her.

And what a sight she was. Somehow Zoe managed to standout, even when everyone else was wearing identical articles of clothing. It wasn't just her hair either; it was her attitude. Patrick had never met a girl like her who – at the tender age of twenty-two – could be so naturally ladylike and youthful at the same time. Her being was effortless and there wasn't a fake bone in her body. The outside of her body wasn't too bad either (as Patrick had been noticing more and more since his surprising dream the other week). Her strawberry curls framed her creamy complexion angelically. The light was touching it, practically making her glow from the inside out. For a second, Patrick lost focus and stared at her. He had to gather his wits and remind himself why he'd run over there in the first place.

"Zoe!" he finally called out and started walking towards her with determination.

Her lovely expression fell when she saw him approach.

"I have to talk to you!" he called out.

"No way!" she cried. Zoe shook her head stubbornly and began walking – more like power walking, actually – down the aisle towards the student seats. All around them ceremonious details were unfolding and here they were, playing cat and mouse as they weaved through the slower, more dignified seniors walking in time to the graduation march. It was hard to miss them. Zoe and Patrick stuck out like sore thumbs.

"You can't run away forever." Patrick pointed out, trying to keep his voice down. "You have to sit down some time!"

Indeed, he was right. Zoe quickly turned into an already occupied row of students, finding one empty seat and sitting down. She thought she was safe there since there were no other open chairs adjacent to her. How wrong she was.

"You there." Patrick said, pointing to the guy directly to Zoe's left. "I'll give you fifty bucks for that seat."

"Deal!"

Zoe groaned and immediately turned away, shielding her vision from Patrick as though the mere sight of him burned her eyes. He plumped down in the seat next to her and touched her shoulder. She only winced and turned away further, cold as ice.

Just then, the music died down and an old, white guy walked up to the podium and started talking in a monotone voice about academics and leadership.

_"What are you doing_?" Zoe hissed angrily at Patrick. "Are you trying to ruin my graduation?"

"Of course not!"

"Then why are you stalking me?"

"Because we need to talk!" Patrick insisted. "I think there was a misunderstand-"

"I don't want to listen to this now!" Zoe's cheeks were turning pink. "I want to listen…to…to whoever is up there now." She turned her head toward the stage stubbornly and stared at the boring speaker with fake interest.

Patrick looked around. It seems the people immediately around Patrick and Zoe were eavesdropping on their conversation since it was obviously more riveting than anything coming out of the microphones.

"Hey!" he hissed loudly to the surrounding students. "Raise your hand if you think she – " he motioned to Zoe – "should listen to what I have to say."

A few curious girls giggled and raised their hands with amusement. Zoe's mouth dropped in shocked offense.

"This isn't a democracy, Patrick and this isn't anyone else's business." She said, eyeing the people around them. "You said what you wanted to say last night and I heard you loud and clear. Why don't you just leave me alone?"

"Because I can't!"

_"Why?"_

"B-Because it's you and me! I can't leave you alone." Patrick sounded like a child, but he didn't care. "I might die…literally. We've always been together…we've always been Patrick and Zoe!"

Zoe was surveying him like he was a mental patient, but he didn't care. Usually Patrick Woodhouse was the definition of smooth. The boy could drop pick-up lines and practically talk his way out of paper bags. For some reason, this was different. For the first time, his heart was in it and his mouth was not. He stuttered as he attempted to express his emotions.

"If you're worried about our friendship or something…" Zoe said, blushing. "don't. I'll get over it, OK? In fact, I can already feel myself getting over you now. In fact, you're making it easy with this spectacle of yours, Patrick!"

"I don't believe you." He said with his usual smugness. "I think you like me more than ever and I can tell because we're fighting."

_"We always fight!"_

"Exactly!" he said triumphantly.

Someone behind him shushed loudly. Patrick turned around and gave them a death glare.

Zoe sighed in confusion. "Pat, you're not making any sense. _Why are you here?_ I'm supposed to be listening to that man up there. I'm supposed to be bored out of my mind right now, not bickering with you! Don't worry…give me some time and I'll come back and we can pretend like none of this ever happened. You'll get your platonic, running buddy back and we can all live happily ever after…"

"That's not what I want."

Patrick Woodhouse's voice was clear now – stronger, determined. His Ben Bates-like stutter had dissolved. Maybe it was the fact that she was completely missing his point. Maybe it was because he was so close to losing her. Whatever it was, he was finally taking control of the situation.

Zoe stopped and stared at him when he said this, blinking a few times as though processing his sentence.

"You heard me right." Patrick said, locking his eyes hers. "You want to know what I think? I think we both have been pretty stupid these past four years. I've done a lot of thinking and I've realized something."

"W-What's that?" Zoe asked slowly, obviously more interested in what he was saying now.

"I know why neither of us has ever dated someone seriously. I know why we were both just perfectly happy watching from the outside as other people have coupled up. It's because we've been a couple all along and we just haven't recognized it. It's because you're the first person I call when something awesome happens and I'm the one you call when you get flat tires. It's because I don't need a girlfriend when I have you to set me straight. It's because you have a freaking key to my apartment and you know I wear cupcake boxer shorts…"

A listening girl nearby raised her eyebrows and glanced at Patrick interestingly. This, however, went unnoticed to both Patrick and Zoe because their eyes were locked together in an unbroken, intense gaze.

"…You're the only girl who stands up to me and I'm the only guy who can force you to lighten up when you get stressed out. And I'm not saying this because we're friends and it's convenient. I'm also NOT saying just because I had that dream about you…"

"Wait –_ what_?" Zoe asked, crinkling her nose.

Patrick shook his head and continued. "I'm saying all of this now…at our graduation…because somehow you make me a better person and for some ungodly reason I will never understand, you have feelings for me!"

Zoe paused and took a deep breath. "Pat, I –I don't want you to do this because you feel bad for me."

"I don't-"

"No," she interrupted. "Seriously, just because you care about me and don't want to lose me, doesn't mean that you have to play along. Love isn't just about admiration, Patrick. It's about passion and chemistry and frankly, we don't even know if we have that because we've never even –"

Without asking, without an introduction, and without any formalities whatsoever, Patrick Woodhouse launched on Zoe Knightley, cradling the sides of her face and smashing his lips to hers.

It's funny, but often in their long friendship Patrick took Zoe's femininity for granted. Now, as he kissed her for the first time, he wondered how he could've been so stupid. Zoe, who had been taken completely off guard by this action, had her mouth open in the middle of her speech (which, by the way, Patrick Woodhouse skillfully took advantage of). Suddenly, she was melting into his touch, closing her eyes and whimpering out of utter relief from the years of silent tension. Patrick fingers were entangled in her red curls as she clung to him, suddenly become completely vulnerable at his cue.

They only broke apart because someone wolf whistled behind them. Zoe took a deep breath, her eyes wide. She was blushing so furiously that her face matched her hair.

"Ok yeah…." She muttered with a shocked look. "We have chemistry."

Patrick smirked at her, taking this opportunity to tuck a curl behind her ear. "Yeah, it's because we're in love, stupid."

Zoe bit her lip and smiled at him, feeling like she might burst with happiness. Her heart was pounding in her chest so furiously that she thought it might pop out. She didn't care, though. If that happened, she'd merely shrug and give it to Patrick.

After all, it did belong to him.

They both looked down and realized that sometime in their quick embrace their hands had found each other. They were still linked by their fingertips.

"Oh my gosh…" a weak, tearful voice whimpered to their right.

Patrick and Zoe leaned over and saw the source of this emotion. Some strange girls – though they looked perfectly nice – were staring at them and dabbing their eyes.

"_That's like the most beautiful thing I've ever seen_." one said, sniffling.

Zoe caught Patrick's eye and burst out laughing. She grabbed the front of his robes, not caring that they'd become the most entertaining part of graduation, and kissed him again. Patrick didn't mind at all. They'd gone this long without kissing, so clearly they had some lost time to make up for.

Little did this newly minted couple know, the graduation jumbo screen was surveying the rows of students, highlighting the bright and eager young faces of tomorrow. The camera panned over their little spectacle, causing quite a few interesting reactions from people around the graduation ceremony.

Maggie shrieked and pointed and the screen. She was tugging on Taylor's robes frantically.

"What is going on?" she cried. "T-That's _Zoe and Patrick._"

"It certainly is." Taylor said, smirking and kissing his girlfriend on the cheek.

Harry smiled and whistled under his breath nearby. "Wow…" he looked up at the giant image of Patrick and Zoe unceremoniously making out in public. "Patrick definitely looks like he knows what he's doing..."

In the family seating, Patrick and Zoe's families were abuzz with this new development. Gran and Sophie were the least surprised out of their respective clans. In fact, Gran waved her finger angrily at the screen as if to reprimand her grandson for procrastination.

"When did this happen?" Kyle asked incredulously, turning to his wife in awe and pointing at the jumbo screen. "I thought they were _platonic_."

Sarah rolled her eyes and patted Kyle's arm. He was obviously out of the loop. "Oh sweetie…don't you know? Most of the time, platonic is just a fancy word for _denial_."

* * *

**a/n: **WOW, I didn't even expect to update that fast, but that scene just flew from my finger tips! I believe that someone requested smooching. I hope you're satisfied. =)

BTW, one more chapter...


	25. Chapter 25: More Cake

**Chapter 25: More Cake**

_Two years later..._

Patrick Woodhouse loosened his blue tie, ruffled his blonde hair, and leaned back in his seat in the metro and tried desperately not to fall asleep. He'd just had a long day at work and felt a headache coming on too. He was also pretty sure that he had a blister on his right heel from his not-yet-broken-in dress shoes. All in all, he was exhausted and he didn't care who knew it.

Unknown to Patrick, a young woman across the car was eyeing him with particular interest. She looked up from her book and smiled. Every few minutes she repeated this ritual until finally (by pure accident) she caught his eye. Patrick nodded and smiled politely. It was a kind, yet dismissive gesture. Her face fell. Being tall, thin, and gorgeous usually got her better reactions than _that_. She was forced to retreat back to her fictional world and forget the handsome man sitting a few feet away from her.

Patrick rarely noticed such things anymore. If he did, then he'd probably note the ego boost with appreciation then promptly forget about it. Generally speaking, he wasn't interested in women like he used to be.

Well, with one important exception.

He exited at his stop downtown and crossed the street, breathing in the brisk twilight air and glancing at the passing business signs. Patrick finally stopped at a small, quaint bakery with an ornate formation of cupcakes in their window sill. He raised his eyebrows with interest and happily entered.

_"You're late!"_

"I'm sorry!"

"You're always late…"

"So you should expect it from me by now, right?" he countered with his usual dose of charm.

Zoe Knightley rolled her eyes, but didn't look truly annoyed. She'd learned along ago – even before they started dating – that some of her boyfriend's habits could not be remedied. Her arms were crossed across her professional outfit. Patrick often teased her about her usual ensemble – cardigan, pencil skirt, button-down shirt, and reading glasses – but secretly he loved it. Zoe looked like the sexy schoolteacher he (unfortunately) never had.

"How was school, _darling_?" he asked her, leaning in to kiss her forehead.

She sighed. "Fine. I had to give a pop quiz."

Patrick gasped. "You're so mean!"

"Feel bad for me! I have to grade them later tonight." she pointed out.

"What a bummer…" Patrick said, smiling slyly. "I had other plans for us tonight."

Zoe's cheeks flushed pink, but she retained her class and pretended that she didn't know what he meant.

After a few minutes of waiting, one of the bakery attendants ushered them into a backroom. Patrick looked like a little boy on Christmas Eve. As soon as Taylor and Maggie had announced their engagement a few months ago, Patrick had graciously volunteered his services to taste test cake flavors. After all, it was Patrick's specialty. As a veteran best man from Kyle's wedding, he was experienced in such matters.

"Where are Maggie and Taylor?" Patrick asked, looking longingly at the slices of cake before him. "_Can we start without them?_"

Zoe laughed. Patrick was so predictable. "They will be late, so yes. We can start without them."

Patrick smiled in satisfaction, grabbing a fork and digging in to a nearby flavor. He held it up to his girlfriend.

"Ladies first."

Zoe leaned forward and took the bite.

"Is it good?" Patrick asked.

Zoe nodded, still chewing the large mouthful. Patrick swopped in and kissed her, licking his lips as he pulled away.

"Ah – Pat" she said, finally swallowing. "That was an ambush…"

"You had icing on your lip and I wanted to see how it tasted." He winked at her.

"Oh really…" Zoe laughed. "and what did you think?"

Patrick shrugged. "I prefer butter cream myself."

The pair continued on like this for a while - Zoe diligently taking notes about what they liked and what they didn't like and Patrick diligently eating whatever was in front of him. They made an excellent team.

"Are you sure that Maggie and Taylor trust us?" Patrick asked, swallowing the mocha crunch chocolate ganache combination. "I mean, they're not even here..."

"Yeah…" Zoe said. Patrick didn't see, but her hands were twisting nervously on her lap. "_I think it should be fine_."

"But what if we botched the order?" Patrick asked. "I don't think I could trust someone else to handle something so _important_ for my wedding. I mean, what if we got something gross like marzipan or…_lemon_."

"But what cake is your favorite?" Zoe interrupted, pressing on with their task.

Patrick shrugged. "I can't decide. I guess they get the final word, right?"

"But if it was…your cake….then which one would you want?"

"I guess it would be –"

Suddenly, Patrick bit down on something hard – something hidden deep in the Italian cream cake he was sampling. He maneuvered the subject around in his mouth, a confused and slightly disgusted look on his face. Zoe was holding her breath.

He spit it out and whipped it off with a napkin. Unexpectedly, a shinny gleam caught his eyes. It was a silver band. Patrick Woodhouse's eyes widened and he looked up with a shocked expression. Zoe's blush had returned and she smiled sheepishly.

"Patrick," Zoe started, laughing nervously and leaning closer to him. "Maggie and Taylor aren't coming. In fact, they've already picked out their cake. I - I was sort of hoping that this tasting could be…for us."

Patrick's was still stunned, his face almost unreadable.

"Uh…Patrick?" she asked again, grabbing his hand with concern. "Did you hear what I just said?"

Patrick looked down in awe at the silver ring in his palm.

"Patrick Woodhouse!" Zoe stood with her hands on her hips, all concern out the window due to impatience. "In all the years I've known you, you've never had trouble opening your mouth and talking so can you please do so now before I go completely nuts! What's on your mind? Say something!"

"Are you…are you proposing?" he asked incredulously.

"Duh!" she cried, feeling more annoyed than she would've liked to at this particular milestone. "And you're required to answer, by the way. That's how these things usually go, Patrick."

"No," he corrected with amusement. "Usually the male – meaning me – plans something cute and elaborate, requiring the female – you – to do the answering."

Zoe stamped her foot. "_Patrick Woodhouse!_ You're ruining this beautiful moment. Can't we do anything normally?"

He swooped in and silenced her with a kiss. In all the time that he'd dated her, Patrick had discovered that this was usually the best way to end a fight, lecture, or silly banter exchange. It was her ultimate weakness. After about five seconds of lip lock, Zoe Knightley tended to melt into his hands like a popsicle in July. Sure enough, he felt her body drain of tension and her hands slip longingly behind his neck as she responded with enthusiasm.

He pulled away, but continued to hold on to her. Her blue eyes were sparking and her lips were swollen from their contact. Patrick grinned.

"Italian cream cake." He said.

"P-Pardon?" Zoe blinked. Clearly, she was still recovering from the spontaneous romantic moment.

"That's the wedding cake we're having." Patrick said raising his eyebrows playfully. "I hope you wrote it down, Knightley."

She smiled beneath him and forced him towards her once more, enjoying the temporary privacy they had in the back room of the shop. It was a few more minutes before Patrick pulled away and sighed deeply in satisfaction.

"You know…it's just too bad you have to grade papers tonight…."

Zoe laughed and punched him playfully in the bicep. She then extracted herself from Patrick's strong arms and smoothed out her blouse. One could always count on Zoe Knightley to stay classy.

"By the way…" Patrick said, catching her eye. "Don't think I'm going to let you off the hook so easily for stealing my thunder."

She returned his gaze with curiosity. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, that if you had just waited a few more days, then Gram's resized vintage ring would've arrived and I could've done all this myself."

Zoe Knightley's face softened into an odd expression. It was like the one Patrick observed on her features when she was watching a particularly touching chick flick or staring at a puppy. She was positively lit up from the inside.

_"Y-You were going to propose to me?"_

"Of course." Patrick said as though it was the most obvious thing in the world. "Who else on earth would crazy enough to marry me? If I didn't propose soon, you might realize you're too good for me and bounce town. I needed to put a ring on that finger ASAP. That is, if you like the ring…"

"I'm sure I'll love it!" Zoe gushed, not caring that he'd just called her crazy. In a way, she was. She recognized this fact but was indifferent to it.

"Do you want me to bake it in something for you -?"

"No!" she interjected, stepping forward and wrapping her arms around him. "No need for any of that."

She went on tip toe and kissed him on the cheek.

You know what, Patrick?" Zoe asked, burying her head in the crook of his neck

"What?"

"Though you often pretend otherwise, you're the biggest softy I know."

Patrick furrowed his brow. "That's a compliment, right?"

She grinned. "You bet."

Patrick held her for a few minutes, enjoying the warmth they created between them. They finally snapped back to reality, eagerly placed their order for a wedding cake, and left the store arm in arm. They didn't know it then, but years later the narrative of their proposal would prove a comical bickering point between the couple. In a true Patrick-and-Zoe fashion, the details of who proposed to whom and which person was more romantic would be challenged. It was all in good fun, however. Essentially what they were fighting about was who loved the other more…and if that's the most recurring argument you have in your marriage, life is not so bad.

**THE END**

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**a/n - **Thank you to everyone for reading and a special thank you for all the people who reviewed. The feedback was awesome for this story and I really appreciated it. I'm so happy this story is complete! I've now completed two Austen fics. Life is good.

PS - virtual high five to everyone who picked up on the "lemon" reference from earlier in the fic


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